Non-Binary Teacher Demonstrates How Easy It Is To Handle The LGBTQ+ Conversations In Schools That 'People Are So Afraid Of'
They debunked the common argument that children won't be able to handle conversations surrounding sexuality and gender identity in the classroom.
It's no secret that several states have passed legislation in the last few years restricting the amount of information students can learn when it comes to sexual orientation and gender identity, seemingly fearful that these topics are sexualizing children when, in reality, they're part of a crucial component of understanding the diverse world outside of a school building.
Many teachers have spoken out against the restrictions, and joining the masses was a non-binary teacher named Desmond Fambrini, who expertly demonstrated why having conversations with students about orientation and gender identity isn't as hard or invasive as others may think.
Fambrini shared how easy it is to have LGBTQ+ conversations with students in schools.
"I'm a non-binary bisexual learning specialist and teacher," Fambrini began in their TikTok video. "These are the conversations that you're very afraid of."
Demonstrating the types of questions they most likely get from their students, Fambrini answered things like: "Are you a boy or a girl?" with an honest reply while also ensuring that they were diverting the students back to learning the lessons. "I was born a boy," Fambrini answered, adding that it was a "good question" to further encourage their students to ask more if they needed to.
"Why do you wear makeup?" was another hypothetical yet easy question to answer. Fambrini replied that they wore makeup because they enjoyed how it looked on them, which was similar to the reason why other people often wore makeup as well. If a student proceeded to ask if they were allowed to wear makeup, Fambrini gently explained that such a discussion was to be between them and their parents, and as a teacher, they didn't have the authority to give out makeup.
For the more invasive questions, like if Fambrini is in a relationship or if they were married, they did a good job of politely declining to answer the question, telling students that it was personal information and not appropriate to be discussed in the classroom. "Do I call you Mister or Miss?" was another common and simple question to answer, and in response, Fambrini replied, "You can just call me Desmond. But in the end, I can't control what you call me."
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"The conversations that you're so worried about are very easy and very fast. Kids are not as confused as you think they are. Here's the kicker, kids don't care about sexuality, they're not actually gonna ask, and if they do, pretty simple to tell them that they've overstepped, and that's a personal matter that doesn't have anything to do with school," Fambrini continued.
Children are much more perceptive and aware than adults give them credit for, and are naturally curious about the world around them, as demonstrated by Fambrini's video.
These conversations surrounding sexual orientation and gender identity can be approached with openness, honesty, and sensitivity, without causing confusion or discomfort among students. It doesn't need to be some convoluted and awkward ordeal; instead, it can be straightforward.
In states like Florida, teaching students about LGBTQ+ topics is banned.
In 2023, 17 states enacted more than 30 new LGBTQ-related education laws, which will all be in effect for the 2023-24 school year unless they are blocked in court, according to NBC News. In addition to places like Florida having these laws in place — dubbed the "Don't Say Gay" legislation — five states, Arkansas, Indiana, Iowa, Kentucky, and North Carolina, enacted restrictions this year on LGBTQ-related instruction in schools.
Currently, 11 states have laws censoring discussions of LGBTQ people or issues in schools, and several additional states have laws requiring parental notification of LGBTQ-inclusive curricula. The argument for why students shouldn't be learning LGBTQ+ topics comes from this outdated notion that learning about it is harmful to minors and they'll be "indoctrinated," which mostly comes from conservatives who even go as far as to say children are being "groomed" by this content, despite how this perpetuates the past moral panic that surrounds Queer people.
LGBTQ+ communities exist all around us and are an important part of our society. To refuse to acknowledge their existence and discuss their experiences is to deny the full spectrum of human diversity.
Living in ignorance that there are people who don't conform to the heteronormative and binary traditions that dominate our societal narratives is not only limiting, it's dangerous.
Teachers like Fambrini are challenging the traditional norms of education by advocating for open discussions about LGBTQ+ topics and proving that not all questions need to be answered with college-level detail, but students should be provided with an environment that enriches and satisfies their curiosity.
Nia Tipton is a Chicago-based entertainment, news, and lifestyle writer whose work delves into modern-day issues and experiences.