Single Mom Upset With Her Ex For Only Sending Valentine’s Day Flowers To His Daughter And Not His Sons
We all deserve to feel loved on Valentine's Day regardless of gender.
coy_Creek / altanaka / Shutterstock For many people, Valentine’s Day is not just about celebrating your romantic partner. It’s about demonstrating love to all of the important people in your life, whether it be your friends, your parents, your siblings or your children.
It is nothing out of the ordinary for parents to buy a box of chocolates and a bouquet of flowers for their children on Valentine’s Day. However, one mother is expressing her hurt after her children’s father only got their daughter flowers.
The father sent flowers to their daughter on Valentine’s Day, but not their sons.
Casey, who shares three children with her ex-husband, revealed that before Valentine’s Day, her ex reached out telling her that he was going to send flowers to their 8-year-old daughter.
While she could not help but think back for a second on the fact that her ex hardly got her flowers on special occasions, her main concern was for her 11 and 5-year-old sons. When she asked her ex if he would also be sending flowers to their sons, since they were also his children, Casey said that he was speechless.
“You can send our sons flowers,” she told her ex. “They would like that too.”
Still, Casey’s ex only sent their daughter flowers.
“By not thinking of our sons, the message he’s sending is you are not,” Casey said.
Casey believes that her ex’s actions are perpetuating men’s feelings of resentment and inadequacy.
“What’s happening is they’re repeating these cycles of little boys who are made to feel that they shouldn’t feel loved, who are made to feel that they can’t connect with their feelings, who are made to feel that they are not worthy of this love and affection because they’re not getting it from the men in their lives,” Casey explained.
Photo: Anna Shvets / Canva Pro
She also believes that by not showing his boys that they are just as cherished as his daughter, they will fail to learn how to properly treat their partners when they get older.
“As a result, these boys grow up not in touch with their feelings, and because of that they don’t think about how they should show up in romantic relationships,” Casey adds. “They don’t think about how they love on other people.”
Casey is determined to make sure that her sons will always know just how loved and cherished they are.
“He deserves people to love on him and to be loved on and understand how important reciprocating that is in relationships,” she says.
After the flowers arrived for Casey’s daughter, she decided to go out and purchase a second bouquet for her sons and told them that their dad sent all of his children flowers.
Other parents agreed that boys are often overlooked on not only Valentine’s Day but other special occasions too. “My husband and I buy our son flowers. He is 17. He smells them, smiles at them, and feels so special. We have done it for years,” one TikTok user shared.
“I saw a TikTok once that most men never get flowers until their funeral. I bought my dad flowers on that Father's Day. He's never reacted so happily to anything I've ever given him,” another user commented. “My husband buys our son and daughter a bouquet of tulips every year,” another user wrote.
Believe it or not, most men appreciate receiving a bouquet of flowers just as much as women do.
According to the Society of America Florists, 60% of men would love to be gifted flowers. It just doesn't happen that often. The harsh reality is that only 12% of men will actually receive flowers from someone they love.
Photo: altafulla / Shutterstock
Just getting flowers for a daughter and not for a son could inadvertently convey gender stereotypes and inequality in the family dynamic. It could also impact their perception of gender equality and influence their attitudes towards gender norms in society.
“In our household, we don’t subscribe to gender norms,” Casey said in a follow-up video. “Each person in this household is loved equally regardless of their gender.”
She adds that Valentine’s Day is not a gendered holiday, but rather a day to celebrate the love and feelings we have for one another.
While women certainly can expect to be spoiled by the men in their lives who love them on Valentine’s Day, it is time to start giving the same energy back to them. Ladies, who says that your man has to be the one planning an extravagant dinner for the two of you? Who says that you cannot buy him a heart-shaped box of chocolates, a teddy bear, and a bouquet of flowers? Men love being surprised with gifts, date nights, and affirmations of love just as much as we do!
It's essential for not only parents, but for all of us to show equal affection, appreciation, and consideration for all of our loved ones regardless of gender to promote healthy self-esteem and relationships.
Megan Quinn is a writer at YourTango who covers entertainment and news, self, love, and relationships.