Mom Says Low-Income Kids Don’t Need To Be ‘Grateful’ For Donated Gifts — ‘Children Shouldn’t Have To Pay For The Mistakes Of Their Parents’
Children in need are not less deserving because of their circumstances.
Gutesa | Shutterstock A mom admitted that children who receive gifts through a toy drive shouldn't have to settle for mediocre and low-quality toys because people refuse to spend a bit more money to ensure every child can experience something special during the holidays.
Her thought-provoking opinion caused a bit of a stir, but Annie claimed that as a mom of adopted kids and someone who once lived in a children's group home, better gifts at toy drives could make all the difference.
A mom argued that low-income kids don't need to be 'grateful' for donated gifts.
"I'm going to say this completely out of a place of privilege, and I know that if I said this without the privilege that I have, I would be torn apart even more and considered very ungrateful," Annie began in her TikTok video.
She explained that as we head into the holiday season, and as someone who adopted children from the foster care system who lived in low-income communities, she had inside knowledge about the gifts that come from toy drives.
Annie observed that there is an unfortunate mindset that kids from low-income families should just be grateful and happy with whatever they receive and thankful that they are getting anything at all.
The mom explained that unless you've experienced a holiday reliant on donations, it's hard to understand how much a nice gift can truly mean.
Annie pointed out that if you've never been on the receiving end of crappy donated gifts, then you don't understand the amount of privilege that you have.
Kids who are subjected to toy drives don't have the luxury of a list for Santa even though they deserve it. And if you think it's only a small percentage of the population, think again. According to Census data, in 2023, nearly 10 million children were living below the poverty line. To put that into perspective, that poverty line threshold is $37,482 a year for a family of four with two children.
Low-income kids who get the majority of their gifts from toy drives are usually stuck with a Dollar Tree Barbie doll that will break by the end of the night.
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Annie wisely stated, "Because you're low-income, you have to be thankful; you have to be grateful because it's a gift from someone. That idea is not right. That is about the giver feeling good and not about the receiver. If we're going to buy things for people for Christmas, if we're going to donate to toy drives, if we're going to take that step of empathy and compassion, can we fully consider the people we are purchasing for and what matters to them?"
The mom shared a message from someone who experienced donated Christmas gifts as a child after receiving backlash.
Annie's initial video was met with unwarranted criticism, with some arguing that "beggars can't be choosers" and low-income kids shouldn't feel "entitled" to receiving gifts in the first place.
This type of mindset is extremely harmful and insinuates that just because people are living in low-income communities, they don't deserve to have nice things or want nice things, especially around Christmastime.
In response to the slew of negative comments, Annie shared a message that would hopefully give insight into a first-hand account from an adult who had been in foster care as a child. "It breaks my heart as I listen to the way people speak about children in need," the message stated. "I wish people would understand this... children that just ask for the bare minimum are children that no longer have the ability to dream."
This woman insisted that these kids in foster care systems are not asking hard-working people for money; they're asking miracle workers and imaginary beings that can produce toys magically because that's what they're taught.
She admitted that it broke her heart to think of her own children. They were young and hopeful, as all children are during the holidays. But instead of carefree dreams, they were left wondering what the people who donated gifts thought of them, especially after receiving thoughtless toys and knockoffs.
"Did they complain that these children in this children's home wanted BMX bikes and Cabbage Patch dolls? Did they call our parents names? Did they call us greedy and selfish? I really hope that wasn't the case, but children should never have to pay for the mistakes of their parents."
At the end of the day, if you can't afford to donate something worthwhile to toy drives, it's better to reconsider participating in them in the first place.
All kids deserve to indulge in the magic of the holidays. There's nothing greedy or selfish about it.
Nia Tipton is a staff writer with a bachelor’s degree in creative writing and journalism who covers news and lifestyle topics that focus on psychology, relationships, and the human experience.