Mom On A Budget Invited 11 Kids To Her Kid’s Birthday Party — Was ‘Embarrassed’ When 8 Additional Siblings Showed Up
She questioned what she should do in the future to prevent this from happening again.
Ground Picture / Shutterstock A mom is wondering what she should do in the future to prevent additional people from showing up to her child's birthday party, especially since she doesn't have enough money to throw large events.
Posting to the subreddit "r/Parenting," she revealed that during the birthday celebration for one of her children, the event was disrupted by people showing up that she wasn't expecting to be there.
She invited 11 kids to the birthday party but was 'embarrassed' after 8 additional siblings showed up that she couldn't afford.
In her Reddit post, she explained that she'd thrown a birthday party for her youngest child, which was held at a venue specifically targeted for children. She had only planned for the kids who had RSVP'd, along with two extra in case someone who didn't respond made a surprise appearance.
She estimated that her daughter's party would have 11 people in attendance and gave the venue the final head count beforehand. The number of people coming also contributed to the cost of food, cake, and goodie bags. However, things didn't quite go as planned after more people came than she anticipated.
Photo: Vlada Karpovich / Canva Pro
"The day of, several parents showed up with siblings. The kids just all started joining in with the rest of everybody. Our total headcount ended up at 19. Which threw off everything, especially the final price," she recalled, adding that she felt even worse for the party venue, which hadn't been prepared for the influx of extra guests.
She and her husband both didn't want to be rude and tell the extra kids that they weren't allowed to play or join in on the festivities since it wasn't their fault, but rather their parents who'd brought them without notifying anyone. The final price for the party ended up being higher than she anticipated and budgeted for.
"I've never had this happen with so many siblings just showing up and parents expecting them to join in. Is this normal now? We don't want this to happen next year. How do you handle it when extra kids just show?" she questioned.
It wasn't as if this party had been thrown at the last minute without planning. Both she and her husband made sure to create invitations so parents would be able to RSVP, and unfortunately, those who didn't let her know in advance that they were coming shouldn't have even been allowed in the door.
The mother's frustration and embarrassment over unexpected guests showing up was more than understandable, and in the future, she shouldn't be scared to be more assertive with the other parents.
If unexpected guests do arrive on the day of the party, politely but firmly explain the situation to their parents. Let them know that you had planned for a specific number of attendees and may not have enough resources to accommodate additional guests. Stress the importance of responding to the RSVP on the invitation when they are initially sent out, and make it clear that there will be no extra guests allowed either.
People offered alternative suggestions for this mother to use if she ever found herself in this situation again.
"We had a similar situation where our venue would only accept 20 people total. We were very clear in the invitation and even requested only one parent per child because we wanted to have as many kids as possible," one Reddit user shared.
"But since it was so small, we communicated with the parents individually, and in the invitation, about the situation, and everyone was happy to accommodate. Thankfully, it all went well. I think for us it only worked out because we emphasized how unique the venue requirements were."
Photo: Chau Nguyen Thi Hong / Canva Pro
Another user added, "Sorry, but you have to shut that down in the moment. Many entitled parents will take advantage of people’s fear of confrontation. On the invitation, you can say something like due to space limitations, additional siblings will not be provided for in the party package, but parents are welcome to pay for their attendance."
While being polite and accommodating is important, parents shouldn't hesitate to enforce their guest limits if uninvited guests arrive. Politely but firmly explain the situation to the parents and reiterate your RSVP policy.
Nia Tipton is a Chicago-based entertainment, news, and lifestyle writer whose work delves into modern-day issues and experiences.