Psychology Says If You Can Master These 15 Thoughts, You'll Remain Stress-Free Into Your 80s
The only person who can manage your stress is you, but these thoughts can give you a boost.
Odua Images | Canva Rates of stress are seemingly going up for large numbers of people at an alarming rate. But what is stress — really? It’s a label. Beneath the label, what are we looking at? Is my stress the same as your stress? How would we know?
Stress can be felt as a negative experience, and it can and does have physical and health implications that can follow you into old age. But at the heart of it all, we’re still dealing with our relationship with thoughts. It may not seem like it, but stress is always emphasized at the level of perception. But if you can master these thoughts, you'll remain stress-free in your old age.
If you can master these thoughts, you'll remain stress-free well into your 80s:
1. Stress is the feeling of tightness experienced in response to a stressful thought
Stress is not anything that happens ‘out there’ in your environment. It's not just the external event itself but your interpretation and reaction to that event that creates stress. Even if a situation seems objectively minor, if you perceive it as threatening, it can trigger a stress response.
2. Things that happen in your reality are all neutral concepts before we apply meaning to them
Whether it be a difficult family member or a frightening deadline. A 2021 study found that our perception creates the emotional weight, not the event itself. By consciously observing our thoughts and challenging negative interpretations, we can learn to perceive events more neutrally and manage our emotional responses better.
3. We experience less stress when we see things exactly for what they are
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By not labeling situations, we can reduce our stress levels. We are more readily accepting of the present moment without adding unnecessary negative connotations or anxieties associated with those labels. We can gain a more balanced perspective and reduce the intensity of that emotion.
4. Our thoughts directly influence our emotional experience
An article published by the University of West Alabama explained how we interpret and think about a situation, significantly impacting how we feel about it. Joyous thoughts lead to positive emotions, and negative thoughts lead to negative emotions. The cognitive appraisal theory explains that our emotions are primarily based on our interpretation of events, shaped by our thoughts and beliefs.
5. If we direct our thoughts away from things that create a feeling of stress, we will have less stress
Regardless of what's going on in our lives, how we interpret situations and thoughts about them directly impacts our emotional response. By consciously shifting our focus away from stressful thoughts, we can experience less stress. While directing your thoughts away from stress is a powerful tool, it can be challenging to practice consistently, especially when facing significant stressors.
6. We are less stressed when we see the benefit of life’s challenges instead of the ‘pain’
We tend to experience less stress and feel more empowered to navigate difficult situations. By actively looking for the positive aspects of a challenge, we can shift our perspective away from negative feelings and toward a more constructive mindset.
Research published in the Stanford Report recommended techniques like meditation can help us become more aware of our thoughts and actively shift our perspective toward a more positive outlook.
7. Other people are only difficult when we believe them to be difficult
Our perception of someone as difficult can significantly influence how we interact with them. This often leads to more conflict and makes them seem even more challenging, even if their behavior isn't inherently problematic. Our preconceived notions can create the very difficulty we experience with them.
8. Feeling overwhelmed results from entertaining many worries in our minds
To feel calm is to instead focus on what’s right in front of you in the real world. To achieve calmness, we must actively shift our attention to the immediate surroundings and current experiences, effectively grounding ourselves in reality.
Research published by Frontiers in Psychology found that this concept is closely linked to mindfulness meditation, which encourages conscious awareness of the present moment to manage stress and anxiety.
9. We are more likely to worry and feel stressed when our bodies are out of balance
A diet high in processed foods and a lack of regular physical activity can significantly contribute to feelings of stress and anxiety by disrupting the body's natural balance and impacting hormone levels. This can make individuals more prone to worry and feeling overwhelmed. Regular physical activity is well-known to reduce stress by releasing endorphins, natural mood boosters, and improving overall well-being.
10. Daily walks will solve so many of your problems
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Walking can significantly enhance problem-solving abilities by promoting divergent thinking and exploring multiple perspectives and possibilities. A study from Stanford University showed that walking can increase creative output by as much as 60% compared to sitting still. Their findings suggest that even short walking breaks can spark new ideas and help overcome mental blocks when facing challenges.
11. Accepting things for what they are, instead of wishing things were different will make you more relaxed
When you're more relaxed, you're more creative and resourceful. A Behaviour Research and Therapy study explained how this would generally lead to a more relaxed state of mind.
It reduces the internal struggle against reality and allows one to let go of unnecessary stress and anxiety associated with trying to change the unchangeable. Letting go of the need to control everything and accepting reality can contribute to a greater sense of inner peace and contentment.
12. Most of our stress comes from being overly self-conscious
This means your ‘cure’ for stress is to be outwardly focused. A significant portion of your stress originates from an excessive focus on how others perceive you. This often leads to negative self-talk and anxiety about your actions and appearance in social situations.
Mindfulness techniques like meditation can help you become more aware of your thoughts and feelings, allowing you to manage negative self-talk more effectively.
13. Putting your attention on making other people feel calm will bring you immediate relief
Making others feel calm can benefit both the person providing comfort and the recipient by fostering stronger relationships, reducing stress levels for both parties, boosting feelings of connection and belonging, and creating a more positive environment overall.
Research published by the University of Liverpool concluded that a calm demeanor can be contagious, influencing others around you to feel more relaxed and at ease. People who think peaceful are likelier to engage in open and constructive conversations.
14. Few people realize the astonishing wealth of insight and intelligence that exists beneath our thoughts
When we let go, our minds still. This is often attributed to reduced conscious processing, allowing unconscious connections and patterns to surface. This leads to a sudden understanding or solution to a problem, sometimes described as a eureka moment.
15. To tap into our inner wisdom, we must be willing to stop forcing thought
We must be okay with uncertainty. Seek support from trusted people and remember that human connection is essential. Other ways to deal with uncertainty are to reflect on your successes, develop new skills, limit your exposure to news, make a gratitude list, and enjoy the simple things.
That is when we are rewarded with the peace and effortless resourcefulness we have been looking for all along.
Alex Mathers is a writer and coach who helps you build a money-making personal brand with your knowledge and skills while staying mentally resilient. He's the author of the Mastery Den newsletter, which helps people triple their productivity.