Man Who Was Tight On Money Given The Silent Treatment After Skipping His Friend’s Expensive Birthday Dinner
He felt like he made a decent compromise.
Icons8 Photos, Aywan88 / CanvaPro Birthdays are a time of celebration, whether it include dancing the night away, having a cozy night in with friends or spending time with family. Oftentimes, it’s a night when everything else in the world goes away. Reality shifts to focus and celebrate the birthday person for a few hours, wherever that may be.
Sean Lans, known as @seanlans on TikTok, described his friend’s choice for a perfect birthday night, complete with an expensive New York City dinner and a ticketed after-party full of dancing and drinking. The catch, however, was that each invitee was expected to pay their own way through the night.
While this felt reasonable for many friends, including some with well-paying full-time jobs, Lans just couldn’t make the expensive commitment, instead making a compromise with his friend to ensure he’d still be around for the birthday celebration.
After seeing how expensive his friend’s birthday dinner was, this man decided to skip it but attend the cheaper after-party.
“I think it’s unfair when someone chooses a really expensive restaurant for a birthday dinner. It’s causing this disagreement with a friend right now — for his birthday, he chose a restaurant where the cheapest entree was $41,“ Lans admits. “Restaurants in New York City are expensive in general, it’s actually crazy.”
In the beginning of the video, he breaks down the context for the disagreement he was navigating with his friend, shocked by the response he had after deciding to skip the birthday dinner. Being tight on money, this man found it reasonable for him to just attend the after-party, instead of wasting ‘grocery money’ on an overpriced meal.
“I’m a little broke right now as it is,” he admits. “I thought it was a reasonable compromise.”
Especially considering the current financial landscape of New York City, where it’s becoming increasingly difficult to survive, Lans admits he wasn’t feeling guilty for deciding to save his grocery money.
When he arrived at the party, he realized his friend was giving him ‘the silent treatment,’ angry that he didn’t attend the birthday dinner.
Things were going well when he arrived at the after-party — everyone seemed to be having a great time, as he wandered around looking for the birthday boy.
When they locked eyes however, he knew something was off, and later found out from a “mutual friend” that he was telling people he “was angry [Lans] didn’t go to the dinner.”
“I don’t really know what to say…I think I made a fair compromise,” he responded. “It’s not like I ditched him, there were plenty of other people who went to the dinner.”
Ultimately, the man thinks expensive birthday dinners ‘are unfair,’ sparking a discussion in the comments about honesty and communication.
“Read the room,” he honestly states in his video. “It’s your birthday, but you should know if your friends are going to be happy at where you choose.”
Ultimately, he was excited to spend time with his friend at the afterparty — a party that was seemingly ruined by his friend’s animosity after skipping the birthday dinner.
“I stand by my decision," Lans said. "Your birthday shouldn’t be about doing the biggest or fanciest things — it should be about having fun with your friends and doing the things that you like.”
Photo: Elina Sazonova / CanvaPro
Comments agree that many people enjoy spending quality time with friends for their birthday, but also support the birthday boy in wanting to go out to a fancy restaurant.
“It’s his birthday — he can choose to do that,” one commenter wrote. “But, you also had the right to choose not to go.”
Others suggest open communication with the friend — and honesty in why he chose not to attend. According to the TikTok man, he did exactly that, letting his friend know he was “tight on money” and would compromise by still seeing him after the dinner.
“It’s weird to expect friends to drop crazy money on your birthday,” another commenter says. “Friends who make you feel bad for being tight on money are not your friends — period.”
Zayda Slabbekoorn is a news and entertainment writer at YourTango focusing on pop culture analysis and human interest stories.