5 Magnetic Things People Who Effortlessly Command A Room Do Differently
You can be the person who lights up a room by prioritizing yourself.
bbernard | Shutterstock.com Think of one person with a magnetic aura — the kind of person who can easily command a room with their powerful energy. Can you picture what they do differently from everyone else? What does their aura or energy feel like?
Empowerment expert and creator Melanie Ruan suggests that this commanding aura isn’t something that people are inherently born with, so there are ways to grow into that energy.
From daily practices to more introspective traits, Ruan shared her five principles for cultivating “a commanding aura” powerful enough to impact everyone when you walk into a room.
Here are the five magnetic things people who can effortlessly command a room do differently:
1. They don’t ask other people for their opinions
From outfit choices to advice for navigating a relationship, people who command a room don’t ask other people for their opinions on their lives. Ruan explained, “I’d rather believe in myself, make my own decisions, make mistakes, take accountability, and then learn and grow … rather than rely on other people to make decisions for me.”
When you understand yourself, express what you need, and make decisions for yourself, you start exuding a type of self-confidence that becomes visible to those around you.
“This is not something that I was born with,” Ruan shared. It’s something you learn and work at.
2. They have a strong moral compass and values they live by
Even if it’s just returning the shopping cart at the grocery store, which Ruan said is a touchy subject in her own family, people who can command a room with their energy prioritize their own values, standards, and ethics in their daily lives.
They’re not “pushovers,” to put it bluntly, and they refuse to sacrifice their own morals for the sake of being liked. Because they put themselves first, they appear more secure and less attention-seeking than their insecure counterparts.
“Someone else I know has a very strict ‘no gossip’ rule with her friends,” Ruan said. “As soon as someone else’s name comes up in conversation, she gets right in there and [breaks] it up…You cannot approach this world with shaky energy and expect to have a commanding aura.”
It might be cliche to rely on such an overused saying, but regardless, it’s completely true: You can’t expect people to respect and trust you if you don’t believe in yourself.
3. They don’t idolize everyone they admire
“Don’t put anyone on such a pedestal that you trust their intuition over your own,” Ruan said. “You still need to identify things [they] say that may not resonate with you … Prioritize your own intuition first.”
Whether it’s an influencer, your partner, or a family member, you can’t expect to command a room and express a magnetic aura if you’re constantly living by someone else’s standards, opinions, or advice.
4. They’re not afraid to admit their weaknesses
Of course, the kinds of people who command a room have a special type of self-confidence that allows them to acknowledge and make the most of their strengths.
However, these same people also remain powerfully humble by acknowledging their weaknesses. They’re self-aware enough to recognize their flaws and take the appropriate steps to address them, helping themselves and everyone else in their lives.
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“I accept myself for where I am,” Ruan said. “It’s about looking in the mirror, seeing both sides of the coin, and fully accepting yourself where you are.”
5. They’re stoic
If you want to command a room and cultivate a magnetic aura, you need to have an energetic stoicism. “It’s inner steadiness and calm,” she explained. “Don’t mistake this as you need to be a robot or that you have to suppress your emotions all the time. That’s not the case.”
Instead, focus on building your emotional intelligence by cultivating positive spaces, prioritizing self-care, and practicing healthy communication and coping mechanisms.
Figure out what works for you, whether it’s therapy, a journal, or something entirely different, and commit to learning, prioritizing, and growing with yourself.
Zayda Slabbekoorn is a Staff Writer who focuses on psychology, health & wellness, social policy, and human interest stories