Men Who Are Truly Happy In Life Prioritize These 11 Core Values
If men want to lead more fulfilling lives, these core values can make a big difference in how they connect to others and themselves.
Krakenimages.com | Shutterstock A 2023 State of American Men report from Equimundo found that two-thirds of surveyed men between ages 18 and 23 say "no one really knows me," and in a 2021 study by the Survey Center on American Life, since 1990 the share of men who lack a single close friend quintupled to 15%. One in five men report that they have no close friends, and one in every four of those younger than 30 say they have no close friends.
Men are admitting that they feel both lonely and sad. Whether that's because of life circumstances or because they're just not prioritizing their mental health and instead focusing on external factors, there are certain core values men who are truly happy in life prioritize. No matter how successful and abundant these external factors are, they don't replace the value of surrounding yourself with loved ones and practicing certain core values that can bring happiness above anything else.
Here are 11 core values men who are truly happy in life prioritize
1. Companionship
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American men are stuck in what's been dubbed a friendship recession, with 20% of single men now saying they don't have any close friends, and more than half of all men report feeling unsatisfied with the size of their friend groups, according to PBS. It's especially prominent in young Gen Z men, and it doesn't help that in this age of modern dating, relationships and romantic love seem to be taking precedence over platonic love.
However, you can't have that romantic love without first learning that kind of compassion and care through being with friends. It's not a stretch to criticize men who don't know how to have deep conversations with their friends or just prioritize being able to find companionship with other men, because it's only through that will they be able to have a safe space to truly connect with others who might be feeling this same loneliness that they do.
2. Accountability
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Being able to hold your hands up and admit when you're at fault is a rather powerful and important core value to have, especially as a man.
When men are able to take responsibility and accountability for their actions, whether they meant any harm behind it or not, they're practicing how important growth is. Especially during a time when men truly have to look inward and realize how their actions impact those around them, they set the stage for being able to have improved and healthy relationships in their lives.
In his book, "The Accountability Revolution," Mark Samuel insisted that "accountability means people can count on one another to keep performance commitments and communication agreements." According to him, accountability can result in increased synergy, a safe climate for experimentation and change, and improved solutions because people feel supported and trusted.
3. Emotional intelligence
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While there's an argument for how much better women are at navigating their emotions and showing up for the people in their lives with an understanding of their own needs and the needs of others, the same sometimes can't be said for a good majority of men. Not only is emotional intelligence helpful in developing and building bonds, both romantically and platonically, but it also allows them to have a deeper understanding of themselves.
A good way to practice getting better at exhibiting emotional intelligence is by actively and consistently attending therapy or counseling sessions. However, according to research from the American Journal of Men's Health, some men are less likely to seek therapy. But some researchers and therapists believe it's beneficial to use different therapy techniques and approaches when working with male patients.
4. Empathy
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In general, women are better at empathizing with other people than men, according to a study published in the journal PNAS. The researchers, from the University of Cambridge in the UK, said the study is the largest of its kind to date looking at a particular form of empathy, something scientists call "theory of mind" or "cognitive empathy."
It's not that men are incapable of feeling empathy or being able to empathize with people in their lives, but rather, they don't seem to consider it an important aspect of developing their sense of self. Once they start practicing and learning about the power of empathy, they'll realize how quickly the aspects of their life start to change for the better.
5. Discipline
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It can be quite easy to set intentions for yourself when it comes to being disciplined, but it can also be easy to abandon those goals, whether that's because of procrastination or just a lack of motivation. However, having discipline allows you to stay focused on those goals and just make overall better decisions.
For men, being able to cultivate and really hone in on the desires that they want out of life can be a big incentive to practicing discipline, whether that's with their health, the relationships in their lives, or even with their careers. It looks different for everyone but the results are always the same: a renewed sense of purpose and hope for what the future has in store.
6. Forgiveness
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When someone does something that makes you angry, upset, or sad, the last thing on your mind is working to forgive that person. And while some situations don't necessarily need forgiveness to be exhibited, there's power in letting go of someone else's burdens to find peace.
Research, including a study from Current Opinion in Psychology, has shown that people with higher anger (those who tend to perceive situations as hostile and are less capable of controlling their hostile thoughts and feelings) are at greater risk of coronary heart disease.
Just because you've forgiven someone doesn't mean you accept that kind of treatment again; in fact, forgiveness doesn't equate forgetting. But forgiveness is incredibly essential to your own personal growth and just being able to move on without having to sit in the past.
7. Patience
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Being able to practice patience in life is quite difficult and truly requires making a conscious effort in your daily life to have it. However, once you're able to become a patient person and really take time to sit in certain situations, you notice that it's easier to make decisions. Not only that, but you end up making better decisions that truly impact your happiness and overall wellbeing.
According to researcher and author Maggie Wooll, with both dedication and sustained efforts, everyone can develop patience. Wooll emphasized the fact that patience isn't transactional as well, saying, "When you're patient with a person, don't hold onto an expectation that they'll give you something in return. Patience is about sustaining and bettering relationships — not holding your good deed above someone until they do you a favor."
8. Generosity
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Generosity, whether that's through time, actions, resources or even emotional support, can create a huge shift in the dynamics within the relationships in your life, especially for men. By choosing to give selflessly in whatever way that looks, men are nurturing and showing the people they surround themselves with that they want to create lasting bonds and memories.
There are also research-backed benefits to practicing generosity. One study from Health Psychology found that generosity actually reduced blood pressure as much as medicine and exercise. And it's not just blood pressure. Generosity also lowers the risk of dementia, reduces anxiety, depression, and improves chronic pain management.
9. Kindness
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Nowadays, most people would rather practice niceness than actual kindness, and when it comes to fostering genuine connections and relationships, the distinction is quite important.
According to psychology experts Suzie Pileggi Pawelski and James Pawelski, numerous studies over the years have found that kindness can boost our happiness levels. Additionally, receiving kindness from others is associated with lower blood pressure and cortisol, a hormone that is responsible for our stress levels.
Not only are there physical benefits to being a kind person, but you end up living a better life overall, both emotionally and mentally.
10. Humility
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Instead of focusing on gaining validation and attention, men practicing humility and adapting that into their lifestyle can reap benefits that lead to a happier life. Not only are humble men more self-aware, but they also have compassion for others because they're able to navigate their emotions in a healthier way than men who are emotionally immature.
They're more likely to accept the criticism and feedback they receive from others without getting defensive. And to truly grow and accept your flaws, there needs to be a considerable amount of humility to exhibit.
11. Respect
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When men actively make an effort to practice respect and be respectful of the people in their lives and those around them, they'll be able to experience deeper connections that can combat the levels of isolation and emptiness that many of them are feeling.
Once you start giving respect to others, you start to notice how often that gesture is returned to you. Respect is the key component of building trust, and without it, you can find yourself stuck in these unhealthy patterns and relationships.
Nia Tipton is a staff writer with a bachelor's degree in creative writing and journalism who covers news and lifestyle topics that focus on psychology, relationships, and the human experience.