Chef Argues That People Who Wait Until Everyone Has Their Food Before Eating Are Actually ‘Rude’ & More Impolite
Is it rude to eat in front of your hungry friends and family?
Marcos Castillo / Shutterstock.com When it comes to etiquette, you could study for a lifetime and still suffer reproach from the likes of the royal family.
Most of us are content with placing our napkins on our laps before we eat and chewing with our mouths closed. If, however, you follow the popular custom of waiting to eat until everyone at the table has their food, TikToker, Eli Rallo, or rather her dad, a chef and restauranteur, would like to have a word.
A chef’s daughter said that people who wait for everyone to get their food before eating are actually impolite.
“I wanted to bring up a lesson that my dad taught me, and that’s also one of my biggest pet peeves,” Rallo started in a video from Father’s Day. “Do you know how when you go out to eat, especially with Americans, and some people have gotten their food, but others haven’t yet?”
“Everyone just sits and looks at the food, but nobody eats it,” she frustratingly added. “It’s apparently ‘impolite’ to eat it, if not everyone has gotten their food.”
In some cases, it just makes sense. If you ordered a cold salad and someone else is waiting on a hot dish, it doesn’t seem like the end of the world to wait until everyone can eat together.
Some might even argue that eating before everyone has their food messes up the entire “vibe” of a shared meal — everyone is on different timelines, finishing early or late, and it’s relatively unpleasant.
But let’s be real. Are we thinking about that with our closest friends while sitting in a booth at Red Lobster?
While traditional etiquette suggests people should wait for everyone to be served before eating, this chef said it’s ‘rude’ to cooks.
“My dad is a chef and a restaurant owner,” Rallo said, “and he says that it’s complete and total [expletive], and he comes from a family of chefs and restaurateurs. He says that it’s actually more impolite to not eat the food the minute it gets to the table regardless if everyone else has their food.”
Not only did she say it’s “rude” to the chefs who made the food, as they intend for the food they make to be eaten as it’s served, but it’s also a custom she’s always found to be relatively strange.
“I’m so sorry. No offense, but I don’t really care that you don’t have your food,” Rallo asserted. ”In a lot of places, like in Europe, they let courses come out as they please … So, what? I’m supposed to sit for 20 minutes while we wait for everyone? No, that’s ridiculous.”
In the company of close friends, you shouldn’t feel ashamed when you eat your food right away. It’s just not that serious — a tagline that Rallo isn’t shy about using — just enjoy your food and company whether that’s seated in a beachside cafe in Italy or at the corner dive bar with friends.
Chefs intend for food to be eaten as it’s served, meaning it’s ‘rude’ to wait in the name of ‘table manners.’
“I just want to remind you that when your food comes to the table, it doesn’t matter if anybody else has their food. You should eat it,” Rallo reiterated. “If you ever go out with me, I’m so used to it I don’t even say ‘sorry.’ I’ll just start eating my food.”
Drazen Zigic / Shutterstock.com
Commenters agreed and even appreciated her dad’s sentiment in considering the chefs who’ve spent time cooking the food.
“I was always raised to eat my food while it’s hot,” one person added in the comments. “If the people around you aren’t saying, ‘Please, don’t wait on me,’ that feels more rude than eating.”
So, the next time you’re out to eat, make sure to enjoy that dish while it’s hot — nobody is reading into it as much as you.
If you’re with company that you don’t know very well, maybe just wait for the nod of approval from others before starting. Table manners are ambiguous, rigid, and exclusionary, so do as Rallo does — “Eat that food, girl!”
Zayda Slabbekoorn is a News & Entertainment Writer at YourTango who focuses on health & wellness, social policy, and human interest stories.