Be Strong Enough To Let Go And Smart Enough To Know You Deserve Better
It's time to get real.
Change never seems to come when you are ready for it. That is just how life works. And change like this, change that is so sudden, can affect how we respond to certain situations around us.
The dreaded "we need to talk" hurts even more when it is out of the blue, and can make the whole process of breaking up feel like the end of the world.
But I promise, it is not the end of the world. Because breaking up is the beginning.
While it is tempting to cling on to the happy moments of the past, you will only prolong the inevitable. And you are stronger than that. Give yourself a little credit here.
Whether your significant other just dropped a major earth-shattering truth bomb, or you have been feeling some serious "this needs to end ASAP" vibes, the best thing you can do for yourself — and your happiness — is to go with the flow.
Do not try to control the outcome. Do not try to hold on to something that is ending.
As they say, find the power to accept the things you cannot control. And use that for your benefit.
So, rather than fighting your fate, accept it. And accept it fully.
Recognize it when you feel yourself kicking and screaming for things to stay the same, and instead, take a deep breath and let go.
If you are finding that process a little difficult because up until now you were super-happy and you cannot completely fathom why your relationship is ending, then it is time to get real with yourself.
Were you ever really happy? Was this actually everything you have ever wanted?
Or, have you just been compromising your own happiness for the sake of not wanting to be alone?
So make a list, read a book, talk to your mom — do whatever you need to do to make yourself realize the truth: you are breaking up because your relationship was broken.
Once you have fully accepted that it is over, the next thing you do is remind yourself of your worth.
The period after a breakup is one for personal growth and reconstruction. It is about figuring about what you need from all your relationships, including the one with yourself.
So instead of wallowing in your heartache, break up with the idea that breakups are the end of the world.
Because really, they are just a beginning.
Emily Blackwood is a writer who covers pop culture, true crime, dating, relationships, and everything in between. Follow her on Twitter.