If You Relate To These 13 Anxiety Issues, You're Probably An Overthinker
If these signs sound familiar, it's likely that every little thing causes you to overthink.
Nayomiee | Canva Worrying constantly is a bad habit to have, but for some people, it feels inevitable. It's the only way they feel like they have control over things, so they always worry about outcomes and what people think of them.
If someone is constantly anxious about the future or worried about what new people will think about them, they could be chronic overthinkers. If any of these anxiety issues sound relatable to you, you may spend too much time overthinking.
If you relate to any of these anxiety issues, you may be an overthinker:
1. Not handling rejection well
That one time someone rejected us? That one time people left us? It’s the one time we think we’re never going to be good enough.
We go through every memory just to find the reasons why we get shot down. Every memory becomes a slap in our face when we think it’s our fault.
Well, it’s not. Don’t beat yourself up because you think you have to change to be liked — or for people to stay. The right people will stay, I promise.
2. Hyperfocusing on everything people say and do
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The people who come into our lives and accept us wholly do not fit into this equation. But those who give us quite of the cold shoulder and a bit of the once-over, well, that’s where our problem fixates on.
We suddenly rack our brains out with questions like, “Do they know something about me that has offended them? Do some people talk bad things about me and word got out of the street? Do I stare too much or laugh too much?”
Most of the time, they didn’t even notice that they had got your mind into overdrive. For them, it was not a big deal and they were just a little shy. But if it’s because they have heard some ‘bad things’ about you, it’s time to prove them wrong. Shower them with kindness.
This often stems from a combination of factors, including social anxiety, low self-esteem, overthinking, fear of judgment, difficulty with social cues, and sometimes underlying neurodivergence. This can lead to feeling overwhelmed in social situations and struggling to interpret subtle social signals.
A study published in Frontiers in Psychology suggested consulting a therapist or mental health professional can provide tailored strategies and support to manage social anxiety and improve social skills.
3. Noticing slights changes in tone in someone’s voice
I don’t know how we do it, but I think it’s because of how we’re particularly observant with the people around us. We rank people’s voices as to their emotions, and we suddenly feel like if the person we’re talking to raises his/her voice a bit more than usual, he/she is angry.
We then sum it up that we have something to do with the change in tone. But more often, we’re just paranoid.
4. Becoming nervous when people send you one-word replies
We’re not used to our chatty friends indulging themselves in mono-syllabic replies. So when they do, we know that something’s wrong. We begin annoying them with our questions.
Well, half of the time they tell you what’s bugging them, and the other half, they’re just not in the mood. Either way, you end up going home and thinking about it. The only cure is when your friends talk to you ‘normally’ again.
5. Checking to see if someone's unfollowed you on social media
People unfollowing, unfriending, or disliking us is going to make us question everything. “Why’d you have to unfollow? Did I post something offensive?”
We then try to think about the reasons… even when we were not close with those people, to begin with. But what if they just accidentally clicked unfollow?
Then again, you start thinking about what if they didn’t just accidentally click it. Don’t stress over it (although I know you will).
6. Catastrophizing every situation
Like when our roommate doesn’t get home at the usual time and doesn’t text us, we hop into absurd scenarios. And when our roommate does get home, we realize the things we thought about were not even possible. Let’s not talk about the quiz or presentation for next week.
We may catastrophize if we've had negative past experiences, particularly in a similar situation, or if we have low self-esteem or a mental health condition like depression or anxiety. Fortunately, we can use strategies like mindfulness and journaling to give us a quick reality check. A study published in Health Psychology recommended identifying the thoughts when they occur and reminding yourself of the connection between feelings and thoughts.
7. Constantly thinking about what other people might be going to say
And sometimes forget about what we want. We think about how people would react if we go for the things that make us happy.
But there are always going to be people who wouldn’t think fondly of you — so maybe we should live a little. Not for them, but for ourselves.
8. Reliving past conversations in your head
We think about a joke a friend dropped two hours ago because we know how jokes are often half-truths. In the end, we just let it go and give our friend the benefit of the doubt but not before analyzing if he/she is really a friend.
9. Ruminating on mistakes
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Sleeping becomes a challenge when you think about that one time you had let a friend down (insert wince) or that failing mark (insert I-wish-I-studied-a-little-harder sigh). No matter how small or huge our mistake is, we still end up lying on our bed willing ourselves — but failing miserably — to stop thinking about it.
10. Not being able to differentiate between compliment vs. sarcasm
When one compliments us, we can’t seem to grasp if it was the truth or simply the person laughing at how dense we could be. Not only do we doubt others, but we begin doubting ourselves.
11. Wavering on choices you've made
It doesn’t matter if it is between the expensive pens you bought or the course you are majoring in college — in the end, we start thinking if we’re going to regret the choices we made. We live by those choices anyway… since we start overthinking where we’ll end up if we quit.
12. Being mistaken as 'negative' or a pessimist
Since we can’t live through the moment with the devil-may-care attitude, people think we are negative thinkers. It’s not that we are pessimists but we are realists.
We get affected by the little things and so we tend to withdraw from what we think would hurt us. But it doesn’t mean we can’t go ahead and jump head first — of course, we’ll first make sure to bring the parachute.
While overthinking can often lead to negative thought patterns and a focus on potential problems, it doesn't necessarily mean someone is inherently pessimistic. 2013 research explained the key difference is that overthinkers may simply be exploring various scenarios, while pessimists tend to automatically assume the worst outcome in most situations, even without extensive analysis.
13. Overthinking about how you're overthinking again
Enough said.
If you or somebody that you know is experiencing a mental health crisis, there is a way to get help. Call SAMHSA’s National Helpline at 1-800-662-HELP (4357) or text "HELLO" to 741741 to be connected with the Crisis Text Line.
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