6 Red Flags A Man's Jealousy Is Completely Out Of Control, According To Therapist Of 25 Years
The red flags often wave right in front of your face.
Jupiterimages | Canva Do you ever ask yourself: Am I dealing with jealousy in relationships? Is his (or her) jealousy reasonable? Is it rational or is it irrational? Is he (or she) being so jealous that it's not right and it's not fair? If so, you need to be on the lookout for signs of jealousy in your relationship. Because if you let things go unchecked, you may find yourself single once again.
Here are 6 red flags a man's jealousy is completely out of control, according to a therapist of 25 years:
1. He always wants to know what you're doing
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Is he calling you all the time and checking up on you? Does he always ask who are you talking to and where are you going? This kind of behavior reeks of insecurity, and research from the National Library of Medicine tells us that will end a relationship.
2. He gets mad when you want alone time
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Is he making issues about you taking time to spend on your own? Does he get upset or angry when you want to go out by yourself or with your friends? It's essential to have 'me time' in a relationship, with one poll even showing that 41% of respondents would break up with their partner if they didn't allow them to have their alone time.
3. He doesn't want you talking to other men
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Does he get upset or complain if you talk to other guys? Does he accuse you of being interested in someone other than him? Does he refuse to see that you are just being social and playful, having a good time with other people and that you just want to share that good time with him?
4. He expects you to be on his schedule
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Does he always want to know what time you're coming home and then get angry if you come home later than expected? Do you feel like you don't have the freedom to be yourself and do the things that are important to you?
5. He doesn't respect your privacy
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This one is very important. Is he going through your personal things — emails, phone messages, your date book — trying to find out where you're going and who you're with because he doesn't trust you?
If you think your partner is jealous, the first thing to do is to reassure him that he has nothing to worry about. Take his feelings seriously, but at the same time, make sure you preserve space to do your own thing.
6. He expects you to dress a certain way
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You're not allowed to wear leggings when you're not with him. Your hair has to be up, and it looks like all of your outfits have to include a baggy shirt or he's going to be blowing up your phone, demanding why you want other men to look at you. Just because you're in a relationship with someone, doesn't give them the right to dictate how you should dress.
If he persists in trying to limit your life and the activities you share with other people to the point where you are feeling controlled by him, it is time to reach out and talk to a counselor to help you learn how to set limits and put controls in place for yourself. You hold on to what's important to you, so don't start giving things up out of fear of his jealousy or to placate him.
Dr. Jane Greer is a marriage and family therapist, author, and radio host. She's been featured in Huffington Post, Psychology Today, Cupid’s Pulse, and on-air at OK!TV.