11 Distinct Behaviors Of Adults Who Have No Close Friends Or Family To Rely On
They know how to look out for themselves.
ShotPrime Studio | Shutterstock While many of us subconsciously experience the benefits of interpersonal interaction in our daily lives, studies like one from the Family Medicine and Community Health suggest that lacking community and a consistent social routine can actually negatively impact our mental health and general well-being in profound ways. From sparking depressive symptoms, to urging people to grapple with loneliness, and even affecting their physical health, not having a social circle to rely on has consequences.
However, there are certain behaviors of adults who have no close friends or family to rely on that sometimes prove that lacking community isn't always "doom and gloom." Whether it's a consequence of their living situation, work schedule, or social skills, it's possible to still form healthy habits and maintain a consistent routine without having a ton of friends or family around.
Here are 11 distinct behaviors of adults who have no close friends or family to rely on
1. They maintain consistent routines
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While many people rely on their friends for motivation in sticking to healthy habits or are even distracted by family members when trying to commit to a new morning routine, one of the distinct behaviors of adults who have no close friends or family to rely on is their ability to craft consistency in their lives, building self-discipline and internal motivation.
Especially considering the goals and habits they develop aren't intentionally created with the external validation of friends or peers in mind, they're much more likely to commit, compared to others that may boast or try out new habits, only to drop them days later.
In some cases, not having a huge inner circle of friends and family can be a conscious choice, giving people the opportunity to focus on their personal growth and goals.
2. They embrace solitude
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With more personal time to invest in themselves, without the pressures of maintaining close friends or family relationships, many of these people also have more time to embrace their solitude. This means unwinding with intentional hobbies, learning how to self-soothe, and pursuing passions that allow them to connect with their own identity.
According to Andrew McAfee, author of "The Geek Way," prioritizing alone time can be incredibly beneficial for your well-being and happiness, encouraging you to connect with yourself outside the lens of external validation or opinions, and giving you the freedom to invest in hobbies that uplift and empower you.
Of course, a study from the American Journal of Lifestyle Medicine determined that making time for social connections and interactions can be equally empowering for your emotional well-being, but with work responsibilities and other community-centric opportunities, even people with no close friends or family to rely on can strike a healthy balance with their solitude.
3. They set strong boundaries
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Considering many adults who don't have a demanding social schedule or full inner circle of friends also don't have to worry about appeasing a million different people — making time to spend with everyone — they're more intentional about setting, practicing, and prioritizing their own boundaries.
From saying "no" to offhand social excursions to crafting their own personal schedules, they're willing to prioritize their own needs and spend time crafting routines that fulfill them, their needs, and their identities. And, according to psychologist Hasaan Mansoor, putting self-care first can improve your mental health, reduce stress, and make room for self-reflection.
While it's certainly possible to learn how to craft healthy boundaries with friends and family in your life, it can be difficult and uncomfortable learning how to navigate expressing them with others at first, especially when you're still figuring out what you need and the best way to verbalize those things to others.
Considering people who have had a lot of solitude to experience and a lack of this inner circle, they're the only ones standing in the way of crafting healthy boundaries — giving them the space and practice to learn how to set them in ways that work for them, outside the lens, validation, and pressures of others.
4. They can handle challenges independently
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Being self-reliant fuels many of the distinct behaviors of adults who have no close friends or family to rely on. They've learned how to navigate life changes, emotional struggles, and conflict by themselves.
It's certainly possible for this kind of self-sufficiency to spiral into hyper-independence, further isolation, and even problems with control. According to the Newport Institute, hyper-independence is a "stress response that causes people to feel they must make decisions and accomplish things without the support of others," which can lead to difficulty trusting others, taking on too much responsibility, and resisting forming close bonds with others.
However, with the right balance and intentions, these kinds of people can confidently accept help, start new relationships, and craft routines while still feeling personally empowered.
5. They're great listeners
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According to Harvard Business School experts, there are a number of ways to develop emotional intelligence outside the realm of social connection — from journaling, to learning to regulate your own emotions, and even investing in intentional hobbies and habits.
With more solitude than the average person and a general commitment to their own routines, many people without close friends or family to rely on form a healthy emotional intellect, able to persevere, regulate themselves, and connect outside of social interactions.
Considering they're more emotionally intelligent than the average person, they're also more empathetic when they do interact with strangers or talk to peers at work, recognizing the importance of skills like active listening in their conversations.
6. They form closer connections with people they do meet
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Being able to form close connections is ironically one of the distinct behaviors of adults who have no close friends or family to rely on. When they do meet someone with shared interests or experiences, they have the emotional and social capacity to truly connect with them, leveraging skills like active listening to help them feel heard and valued.
Despite not having those close relationships with friends or family to rely on, these people still have a great capacity to connect. In fact, research from Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin found "positive relationships between the ability to manage emotions and the quality of social interactions."
People with no close friends or family are not only emotionally intelligent enough to connect without reservation, they're willing to offer up support, help, and love in ways that both uplift them and others.
7. They cut off emotionally draining people early
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With the emotional intelligence and internal security necessary to set intentional boundaries, people without close friends and family to rely on often pick up on other people's energy easily. From noticing a shift in a conversation's energy to acknowledging when a friendship isn't empowering them, they're willing to cut people off early to look out for their own well-being.
Although people with close friends and family aren't typically only relying on them to provide advice for setting boundaries or cutting off relationships, it's important to note that people without that inner circle of advice are forced to set clear boundaries, figure out their own needs, and reimagine their relationships without help or wisdom from others.
8. They enjoy occasional social interactions
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Considering that many people who have no close friends or family to rely on also aren't encouraged to attend a sleuth of social events they're not interested or motivated in going to, they have more emotional space to enjoy the intentional events they choose to be a part of.
While other people might drain their "social battery" by constantly attending social events and connecting with the people in their lives, people without a consistent inner circle tend to intentionally craft social experiences that empower and recharge their batteries, making social interaction much more enjoyable across the board.
Not having a close inner circle or accessible family members doesn't mean you have to be completely isolated; in fact, it can ensure you have the space to focus on yourself and intentionally interact with people that empower you, rather than drain your energy.
9. They're occasionally uncomfortable with change
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While embracing solitude and making the most of their personal habits are some of the distinct behaviors of adults who have no close friends or family to rely on, the predictability of this routine also makes it hard to be comfortable with change.
According to Rosabeth Moss Kanter, author and former chief editor of Harvard Business Review, common reasons people resist change include fearing a loss of control, doubting their competence, having past resentments, and being afraid of uncertainty.
For people who have no close friends or family to rely on, they may still be interacting with other people and forming new relationships that adds diversity to their routines, but considering they're intentional about the events they choose to go to and the conversations they choose to open, they're not battling natural life changes, challenges, or discomfort to the same degree as others.
10. They encourage people to work for their trust
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Although trust is necessary to cultivate in relationships, according to research from Frontiers in Psychology, many of the healthiest connections start out with a very basic understanding of trust and loyalty.
Rather than forcing their partners or friends to essentially "work for" their trust, they simply offer it up — less condemned by the fears of rejection or abandonment that people without close friends or families may struggle with.
Especially if they're comfortable in their routine and personal life, being open to starting new relationships and offering up vulnerability and trust can be awkward and anxiety-inducing. However, with the right tools and a reliance on the emotional intelligence that supports open communication, they can find a healthier balance to connect with others without reservations.
11. They may be overly accommodating to others
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People-pleasing and adopting an agreeable attitude are some of the distinct behaviors of adults who have no close friends or family to rely on, despite being intentional about their personal boundaries and time.
Considering they have a heightened sense of empathy for those around them and internal emotional intelligence, they may get stuck in a routine where they're consistently trying to offer support to people to combat their own subtle feelings of loneliness or isolation.
Zayda Slabbekoorn is a staff writer with a bachelor's degree in social relations & policy and gender studies who focuses on psychology, relationships, self-help, and human interest stories.