Groom Asks His Sister For $115 To Pay For Her Meal At His Wedding Despite Her Gifting Him $400 In Cash
Don't host a wedding you cannot afford.
Nicoleta Ionescu | Shutterstock Paying for a wedding is no easy feat. The Knot’s Real Weddings Study found that the average wedding cost about $35,000 in 2023. That amount of money could easily be used to purchase a car or make a down payment on a house.
Still, it is up to the bride and groom to pay for the festivities, unless they have another arrangement. For one couple, that alternative arrangement came in the form of charging their guests.
A bride and groom charged their guests $115 to eat at their wedding.
The groom's sister, who was “absolutely baffled” by her brother’s “audacity,” took to Reddit to vent and ask for advice.
“My younger brother got married a few weeks ago and it was overall a lovely evening,” she shared. Unfortunately, things didn’t stay lovely. “This week, I received a text from him saying, 'Hi. [My wife] just told me she hasn’t received your $115 each. No rush. You can send it to [my email].”
“Now, at no point before now was it communicated to me that they were charging guests to attend,” the sister clarified. “Nowhere on the invitation either. Plus my husband and I already gave them $400 cash in their card.”
The Redditor noted that the cost of the wedding venue could explain why the couple felt the need to charge their guests. “This wedding took place at an expensive restaurant downtown in a private room that’s famous for its architecture,” she wrote. “No idea why they booked that place if they can’t afford it. No open bar or dance floor.”
When she asked her brother about the charge, he nonchalantly responded that he thought she knew, and must have forgotten to tell her. Infuriated, things quickly got heated. "I eventually told him I would send the money, but he can wait," she said. "Now I’m considering not sending anything and if he asks I’ll say, 'Oh, I forgot.'"
The sister later shared an update on how negotiations were going with her brother.
The woman popped back into the comments section of her original post to provide an update. She claimed her brother ghosted her, and that she would not be sending him any money.
“I’ve found out that they did charge everyone to come to their wedding, but I seem to be the only one who didn’t know beforehand," she added. He insists that he forgot to tell me and that he’s not this person I think he is. I don’t buy it.”
“We’ve been estranged in the past and I don’t expect to see him anytime soon, not even for the holidays,” she added before revealing the last text message she sent him.
“I don’t know if you know this, but it’s extremely poor etiquette to charge people to come to a wedding," the woman messaged her brother. "On that principle, I have changed my mind. Please deduct the charge for your wedding from my gift money you have already received. Thank you so much for understanding.”
While weddings are becoming more expensive, that’s not an excuse to charge guests.
Charging guests seems to have become somewhat of a trend in recent years as the costs of weddings have risen. But, Matthew Shaw, founder of the wedding planning company Sauveur, told the New York Times that’s not an excuse for the lapse in etiquette.
“You’re no longer hosting — you’re offering them a paid experience, which introduces a very different narrative in terms of what guests are expecting,” he said.
Although charging guests may seem like an easy way to offset wedding costs, it’s really in poor taste. It would be better to hold a celebration more within your means.
Mary-Faith Martinez is a writer with a bachelor’s degree in English and Journalism who covers news, psychology, lifestyle, and human interest topics.