11 Phrases People With Serious Emotional Issues Say Often
People with unchecked emotional issues often believe they don't deserve happiness.
goffkein.pro | Shutterstock Emotional hardship is an inevitable part of the human experience. For every win, there's a loss somewhere along the way. Pain doesn't have to become an impossible struggle, but we have to be brave and reach out for support in order to move through it. The phrases people with serious emotional issues say often reveal the depths of their despair. Yet even at their lowest point, they have a well of resilience to draw from.
Identifying and expressing how they feel is the first step to finding their center. No feeling lasts forever. Even the most difficult emotions ebb and flow. Accepting this as a universal truth might not be easy, but it is transformative.
Here are 11 phrases people with serious emotional issues say often
1. 'I never do anything right'
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Being dysregulated often makes people with serious emotional issues say that they can't do anything right. Negative feelings can create a sense of imbalance, especially for people who lack the ability to self-regulate.
According to Harvard Health Publishing, people can't avoid hard feelings, but they can change how they respond to them. Cognitive behavioral strategies help people recognize their emotions and assign them a name. This practice helps them understand their more difficult feelings and ultimately let those feelings go.
Being able to self-regulate doesn't mean your difficult emotions will completely disappear, but it does provide you with skills to manage your emotional challenges with patience and self-compassion.
2. 'I can't handle this anymore'
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When people with serious emotional issues say the phrase "I can't handle this anymore," it's often a sign that they've lost access to the coping mechanisms and tools they need to hold onto hope. The Mayo Health Clinic pointed out that feeling a sense of loss is a common reaction for people to have after receiving a life-alterning diagnosis about their physical or mental health.
Letting yourself grieve is essential for healing, yet the Mayo Clinic pointed out that it's equally as important to focus on your abilities, not only your limitations. When it feels like all hope is lost, finding meaningful anchors can reconnect you to your deeper purpose. Focus on the people you love and the activities that bring you even the slightest joy to regain a baseline of hope.
3. 'I feel like a burden'
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Facing serious emotional issues can make people feel like they're a burden to everyone around them. They see themselves through a distorted lens, which keeps them from reaching out for help when they need it most.
People with serious emotional issues often say they feel like a burden because they're deeply disconnected to their own inherent self-worth. They worry that their emotional issues mean they're not deserving of love or community care, yet this couldn't be further from the truth.
At our darkest moments, we need to lean on the people who love us. One study from Psychiatry supports this, finding that leaning on your support system during difficult times is beneficial to mental health. When we're unable to lift ourselves up, we can reach out and take hold of another person's hand, and let their unwavering love guide us back into the light.
4. 'I feel like my life is falling apart'
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It's hard for people with serious emotional issues to feel like they have agency over their own lives, which is why they often say that it feels like their lives are falling apart. Coping with acute stress, anxiety, and depression is never easy, yet people with serious emotional issues have a hard time seeing that they're capable of doing hard things.
Even minor setbacks feel unmanageable, in part because people with serious emotional issues hold themselves to impossibly high standards. They put immense pressure on themselves to be perfect, which makes it even harder for them to see that they're doing the best they can, just like everyone else.
As life coach Jordan Gray pointed out, "Perfection doesn't exist. Progress does." More often than not, all anyone can do is put one foot in front of the other and celebrate every small win. "Keep moving forward," Gray advised. "That's all any of us can ever do."
5. 'I don't deserve to be happy'
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Happiness is a human right, but people with serious emotional issues often say they don't deserve to be happy. Their core wounds are so overwhelming, they can't see how worthy they truly are. They go through life with the misguided belief that they're too broken to ever be happy.
The truth is that everyone is deeply flawed, and they still deserve to be happy. Once people with serious emotional issues accept this truth, they can give themselves grace, which will ultimately lead to a quiet sense of contentment.
6. 'I don't want to talk about it'
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"I don't want to talk about it" is a common refrain from people with serious emotional issues. They don't face their feelings, out of fear that whatever they discover will be too hard to manage. This fear keeps them trapped in their turmoil, unable to see that letting their emotions out is the only way to heal. As Gray revealed, "You grow in life to the degree that you're willing to lean into difficult conversations."
Airing out their darker, more difficult sides guides people with serious emotional issues toward a path of radical self-acceptance. "Ask tough questions," Gray advised. "Speak challenging truths... Lean into your discomfort and you will gain more confidence for every unit of courage that you expend."
7. 'I just want to disappear'
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People with serious emotional issues often say that they want to disappear, because life feels too painful to navigate. According to clinical psychologist Vinita Mehta Ph.D., Ed.M., serious psychological conditions are often rooted in trauma, which cuts people off from themselves. Having a history of trauma can make major emotional issues feel so overwhelming that people want to disappear from their own lives.
While it's never a simple or linear journey, healing from trauma is possible. Moving from repression and disassociation to embracing their emotions allows people with serious emotional issues to change their self-perception. Understanding and accepting their past trauma gives people a sense of control over their narrative, which ultimately leads to empowerment.
8. 'I don't know who I am anymore'
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Serious emotional issues often create a sense of dysregulation, which can make people feel disconnected from themselves. Because they struggle to access a healthy sense of self, people with serious emotional issues often say that they don't know who they are. They feel adrift in their own lives, which makes it hard to find meaning in their existence.
Psychological research has shown that having a consistent sense of identity is directly correlated with higher self-esteem. To find your way back to yourself, you have to ask hard questions, tune into your deepest feelings, and be willing to sit in the discomfort they bring. Self-trust doesn't appear overnight, but figuring out what your values will absolutely lead you to become your most authentic self.
9. 'I ruin everything'
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Accepting mistakes is a challenge for everyone, but it can be especially difficult for people with serious emotional issues. They often say that they ruin everything, a phrase that signals how deep their sense of shame goes. Holding onto everything they've done wrong makes it impossible for people with serious emotional issues to let themselves off the hook and move on with their lives.
According to divorce coach Karen Finn, forgiveness is an incredibly powerful tool for living a happier life. "It's hard to experience genuine happiness if you're constantly berating yourself for a past transgression or still tied to a past transgression of someone else," she shared.
"Forgiveness isn't about condoning the transgression; it's about not letting it control you... Let the past be in the past. See the present for what it is, and allow the future to be full of promise," Finn concluded.
10. 'No one cares about me, anyway'
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Having serious emotional issues can create a sense of separation and isolation. When people are really going through it, they often say that no one cares about them, and they really believe that to be true. They get so lost in their troubles, they can't see how loved they really are.
As Mehta pointed out, trauma can lead people to internalize a distorted view of themselves and their relationships with other people. They operate from a place of unworthiness, which impacts their ability to trust in their own lovability. They reject themselves before anyone else gets the chance, holding themselves apart, which only reinforces how isolated they feel.
11. 'There's no point in trying'
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People with serious emotional issues are driven by a deep sense of despair. They don't see a way out, and they often express that they don't see any point in trying. They're overwhelmed by the intensity of their own emotions, like they're stuck in a current they can't escape from.
When life feels too hard to manage, we can turn to the people we love. We can gather strength from their love and carry it within ourselves, giving it freely to those in need. The only thing we can really do in this world is try our best, leading with love as we go.
Alexandra Blogier, MFA, is a staff writer who covers psychology, social issues, relationships, self-help topics, and human interest stories.