12 Signs Someone In Your Life Is Completely Out Of Touch With Real World Struggles
A deep dive into just how far removed some people are from the challenges others face.
sav_an_dreas | Shutterstock According to the Federal Reserve Bank of St. Louis, the top 10% of households by wealth hold nearly 70% of our nation’s total household wealth, compared to just 2.5% in the bottom 50% of American households. So, not only can the wealthy afford basic necessities like rent and groceries, but they’re also set up for generational wealth, constant luxury, and societal influence in ways that middle-class Americans can’t fathom.
While it’s not just wealthy people who live this reality but a more prominent host of economically and socially privileged people, there are ways ignorance, manipulation, and disconnect can seep into social interactions and relationships with people from all demographics and backgrounds. In your day-to-day reality, there are unsettling signs someone in your life is entirely out of touch with real-world struggles, feigning an ignorant and dismissive attitude towards others that can sabotage your basic sense of empathy and trust.
Here are 12 signs someone in your life is completely out of touch with real-world struggles:
1.They dismiss other people's complaints about financial stress.
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When someone constantly brushes off concerns about money, they may not just lack empathy — they could be disconnected from financial struggles altogether. People who have never experienced financial insecurity, such as living paycheck to paycheck or struggling to cover basic needs, find it difficult to understand these challenges.
Suppose you’re expressing anxiety to a friend about your current financial situation, and they’re consistently brushing it off or insinuating that you’re overreacting. In that case, they’re not just a bad friend but likely incredibly out of touch with real-world struggles.
People who have grown up with privilege or have never experienced money stress find it difficult to imagine a reality where they’re living paycheck-to-paycheck, afraid of being evicted over missed rent, or going hungry after paying for a utility bill. They always have a backup plan, whether it’s family, saving money, or debt, to lean on, so they can’t empathize with the financial struggle in the ways someone who's been there before can.
While this can be frustrating in personal relationships, it’s not necessarily demonizing behavior. They’re unable to relate until they invalidate or dismiss your concerns.
2.They promote irresponsible spending on luxuries.
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If a friend insists on spending lavishly — dinners out, expensive vacations, and frequent indulgences — without considering your financial situation, it’s a clear sign they’re out of touch. Such behavior reflects an inability to empathize with the reality that many people can't afford these luxuries without going into debt.
Encouraging others to spend on irresponsible luxuries or invest money in unproductive ways is one sign that someone in your life is entirely out of touch with real-world struggles. Even if they’re unaware of your financial situation, expecting friends to go out every night, spend thousands on vacations, and invest in parties, gifts, and experiences every month is radically inaccessible for most people in the current economic climate.
Considering the deterioration of “third places” and accessible community-focused areas for social interaction, many people feel pressured to spend money to see their friends or financially invest in things like a gym membership or daily coffee to find social connections. However, in the face of a friend with a much different financial situation, this disconnect can feel overwhelming — sparking feelings of isolation and loneliness. At the same time, your peers plan an expensive trip or birthday party.
Of course, people living out of touch from real-world struggles aren’t always financially secure. Sometimes, they’re more willing to take on debt to fund their luxuries, social connections, and prestige. While missing out on opportunities with friends can be discouraging, the right people won’t encourage you to spend irresponsibly and spend quality time together.
3.They believe in the misleading ‘pull yourself up by your bootstraps’ mentality.
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Out-of-touch individuals often promote the "hustle culture" mentality, expecting others to work harder without understanding how privilege and opportunity shape success. This usually leads to criticizing those who need support despite never having faced financial insecurity themselves.
With such a strong societal emphasis on hard work, and the American Dream, many people who’ve grown up in privileged situations, specifically financially, struggle to rationalize the misguided nature of these manipulative and misguided motivational themes. They believe people should “pull themselves up by their bootstraps” without having ever ridden the horse of financial insecurity,
Not only do people who are radically out of touch criticize others for not “working hard enough” to achieve financial comfort, success, or stability — despite having worked little for their privileges — but they also actively condemn people in less fortunate situations for seeking support from resources like government assistance programs.
They’re not only entitled, feeling like they’re worthy of similar support despite not needing it, but incredibly out of touch with the reality of their peers’ struggles, communities, and the world at large. Of course, many of these entirely out-of-touch people don’t face criticism or pushback from the people in their lives, as they subtly and sometimes subconsciously craft “echo chambers” to reassure their misguided opinions and beliefs.
4.They don't know the real cost of everyday necessities.
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Someone not involved in budgeting or seeking affordable grocery options might be unaware of how expensive necessities can be. Ignorance of the rising costs of essentials like fresh produce, menstrual products, and baby food reveals a vast disconnect from real-world struggles.
When people aren’t regularly budgeting for groceries, seeking out the best prices, or pressured into rigid financial circumstances when paying for basic necessities, they often grow ignorant of the actual costs and the dollar's value.
While many people in financial crises struggle to afford fresh produce, baby food, and menstrual products, others shop at organic food stores and spend $500 on a casual grocery store trip.
Of course, it makes no sense to demonize people who can afford to pay for organic, nutritional, and high-priced groceries. Still, it’s worth examining the disconnect between these demographics and those constantly battling food insecurity to pave a more equitable path forward. When people are ignorant or dismissive of this disconnect, it’s a sign that they're entirely out of touch with real-world struggles.
5.They deny basic human rights like food, water, and shelter.
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Those who dismiss the concept of human rights—such as food or water being a basic necessity — often do not grasp the struggles faced by others. Wealthy elites who make callous remarks about the poor, like suggesting they make sacrifices to save money, exhibit this out-of-touch mentality.
Many people living out of touch are intrinsically motivated and more concerned with their stability, access, status, and success than helping those struggling to survive.
On a more corporate level, financial elites and wealthy people living out of touch with reality perpetuate harmful stereotypes through this profit-driven mindset. Even Kellogg’s CEO, suggesting poor people should “eat cereal for dinner” to offset rising grocery costs and financial insecurity, invalidates financial insecurity through the lens of their profit and success.
With CEOs suggesting water isn’t a human right and others demonizing government assistance for food-insecure households, it’s impossible to ignore the ignorance many people living out of touch perpetuate — even in passing comments and conversations. It doesn’t take much more than empathy and basic understanding to fuel a belief that people deserve shelter, food, and water, even if they cannot hold a job or play into the rigidity of “hustle culture” that benefits particular demographics of people.
6.They think sacrifice alone will lead to financial comfort.
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Out-of-touch individuals often preach that sacrifice — cutting out small pleasures — is the key to financial stability. However, the reality is much harsher for many: even with budgeting and sacrifice, they’re still struggling to meet basic needs due to rising costs and stagnant wages.
A person’s general financial beliefs can be one of the signs someone in your life is entirely out of touch with real-world struggles, especially if they’re passing off financial advice to people without having experienced poverty or struggled to pay a bill in their life. Not only do they believe sacrifice and temporary discomfort are the keys to financial stability, but they also tend to demonize poor people who seek out occasional luxuries — arguing that grocery store treats, fast food meals, or even a T.V. in their home is “the reason” they’re financially struggling.
Despite indulging in a vice at the end of a hard day or “couch rotting” on the weekends, these out-of-touch people refuse to give homeless people money — claiming it’ll go towards their vices — or express empathy when discussing issues of poverty. They’re not just ignorant but blatantly self-centered, with unrealistically inflated egos surrounding their success.
Sacrifice and budgeting don’t help people thrive; they only help them survive. According to a Bank of America survey, nearly half of Americans live paycheck to paycheck, struggling to keep up with necessities and bills amid a tumultuous job market, rising costs, and inflation.
If proper budgeting, occasional sacrifice, and planning were the cure for poverty in this country, everyone would be financially comfortable and secure. But, of course, that’s not the case. Despite working full-time and, in some cases, multiple jobs, many still struggle — simply surviving to pay for necessities, even after cutting out small luxuries like a treat for their kids at the grocery store.
It’s this cycle of dehumanization, and these ignorant opinions that out-of-touch people feed into that keep misguided stereotypes about poverty thriving, causing people already struggling to burn themselves out, blame themselves, and feel embarrassed about asking for support.
7.They refuse to consider or respect differing opinions.
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A rigid, "black-and-white" view of the world is one sign that someone in your life is entirely out of touch with real-world struggles. They not only believe their perspective on the world is inherently correct, but because of their power, success, or prestige, they refuse to debate or consider differing opinions.
This inflexibility creates tension in relationships and hinders their understanding of social issues, especially when they dismiss the struggles of those with differing experiences.
Even on an interpersonal level, the inability to accept or hear opinions that differ from theirs causes tension between people living out of touch and their families, especially for adult children and their parents, a study published in the Psychology and Aging Journal explains. They’re not only stubborn in their rigid view of the world, but they believe they’re “right” in every circumstance, causing the people in their lives to feel less heard, understood, and valued, even in seemingly passive interactions.
Along with family tension and societal ignorance, people out of touch with real-world struggles also tend to demonize and dehumanize other people they disagree with, suggesting there’s something inherently wrong or faulty with their opinions to support their own. Not only does this sabotage their social connection, isolating them from relationships with diverse and unique people, but it also causes other issues like generational disconnect and resentment that follow people throughout their lives.
8.They have the privilege of family support for childcare.
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Not everyone with family support for childcare is out of touch. Still, those who fail to recognize the financial burden it poses to others — suggesting that other parents need to work "harder" and be more responsible to be comfortable — can be.
According to research from the U.S. Department of Labor, some families spend nearly 20% of their shared income on childcare alone — an incredibly unaffordable and inaccessible expense many can’t afford to ignore.
Some families are even quitting jobs to offset expensive childcare costs, unable to rely on family members or grandparents to watch their children. Even people in power, with the influence to change this inaccessible institution and make things more affordable, perpetuate ignorant ideas about solving this “crisis” with familial support, forgetting that the majority of parents raise children entirely on their own or away from their families.
If we’re talking about sacrifice, as some out-of-touch people suggest, it is the cure for financial instability. For many families, it’s the difference between childcare and their kids’ future education, the difference between affording to pay rent, buying groceries, and having safe, accessible childcare. It’s not giving up a TV or fast food meal to pay a babysitter; it’s larger, life-changing decisions that people living out of touch can’t fathom making.
9.They are unaware or avoidant of global issues.
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People with the means to help often remain blissfully unaware of global struggles or issues such as poverty, injustice, or humanitarian crises. Their avoidance of uncomfortable truths and unwillingness to engage with these issues highlights a deep disconnection from the real world.
Especially with growing technological accessibility and resources to support people in less fortunate situations around the world, there’s genuinely no excuse for ignorance in people with the means, comfort, and stability to give back. Of course, not everyone has the time, money, or energy to learn about every niche humanitarian issue or world crisis. However, those who intentionally avoid education to support their comfort tend to be radically out of touch.
According to the American Psychological Association, many people feel less motivated to become self-informed about these issues the more they commit to remaining ignorant. Instead of acknowledging their privilege and power in genuinely helping others and learning about inequitable and unjust situations, they feign ignorance to avoid uncomfortable feelings like shame, guilt, or embarrassment.
10.They use a victim mentality to gain sympathy.
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Even though they might criticize others for their struggles, some out-of-touch individuals play the victim when it benefits them. They use their own misguided financial or social struggles to gain sympathy, even when their issues pale compared to the challenges others face.
They may criticize people struggling to pay rent and financially survive while, in the same breath, suggesting they need financial support to pay their expenses after spending irrationally or irresponsibly.
Even if it’s simply to gain sympathy or emotional support from other people, people who are radically out of touch will play the victim, playing off stereotypes or misleading people about their financial or social situation to get attention.
11.They constantly complain about minor inconveniences.
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Instead of expressing gratitude, out-of-touch people often complain about trivial inconveniences, ignoring the real hardships others face. This behavior stems from a sense of entitlement and lack of awareness, combined with a craving for attention and misguided empathy, further disconnecting them from the struggles of those who are less fortunate.
In many cases, a person’s disconnection from reality encourages them to stay stagnant rather than seek a general understanding of the world around them. They may be entitled enough to believe that everyone owes them something and that they’re not truly in control of their lives, which leads to constant complaints and unnecessary judgment. Despite criticizing others for not taking “ownership” of working themselves out of poverty or an unfortunate circumstance, they may continue to feel entitled.
It’s ignorance and idiocracy that infiltrates these out-of-touch people and communities, encouraging them to dehumanize people living in poverty or enduring systemic oppression while still complaining about losing their parking spot or having to pay extra for food they didn’t like at a restaurant.
12.They are disrespectful to service workers.
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Out-of-touch individuals may belittle or treat service workers poorly, reflecting their skewed sense of superiority. This rude behavior often stems from an inflated sense of entitlement, ignoring the hard work and dignity of those in less prestigious or lower-paying jobs.
While there are undoubtedly personal exceptions to situations where people are rude to service workers, many out-of-touch people tend to lash out at people they perceive to be less “successful” or prestigious than them. It’s this inherent insecurity or sense of powerlessness they feel drawn to prove that manifests itself in their lack of empathy and rudeness.
People who benefit from societal stereotypes like traditional career routes in Corporate America are the same people who work tirelessly to uphold them — with their identities tied into the perceived success and prestige they feel operating within them.
By being rude to service workers and dehumanizing people in less traditional careers, people living entirely out of touch from real-world struggles find comfort — believing they’re owed something or entitled to more opportunity simply for finding a spot in a rigid, toxic and confirmative societal structure.
Zayda Slabbekoorn is a staff writer with a bachelor’s degree in social relations & policy and gender studies who focuses on psychology, relationships, self-help, and human interest stories.