11 Hard Truths Gen Z Should Accept In Life, According To Boomers
The best part of accepting these truths is that they make life much more enjoyable.
PeopleImages.com - Yuri A | Shutterstock Life is anything but easy, especially in young adulthood, when most people are just figuring out who they are. As the years pass and people grow older, they learn valuable lessons that pave the way to an authentic and meaningful existence. Life is vastly different than it was just a few decades ago, yet listening to advice from older generations still holds value.
Gen Z might disregard the generations before them as old-fashioned and out-of-touch, yet there are hard truths Gen Z should accept in life, according to boomers. While no single person has the answer to everything, having life experience often translates into a deeper understanding of how to find your way in the world.
Here are 11 hard truths Gen Z should accept in life, according to boomers
1. Success takes time and effort
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The age gap between boomers and Gen Z is significant. The world Gen Z has inherited looks nothing like the one boomers built. Their version of success doesn't exactly align with how boomers define it, yet the hard truth behind being successful remains the same.
Instantaneous prosperity is the exception, not the rule. No matter what kind of success someone aims for, they shouldn't expect it to appear if they don't put in the work.
Writer and coach Alex Mathers revealed that being successful requires "a simple re-alignment" in the way people map out their goals, declaring, "The secret to achieving anything you want comes down to two words: Thinking small."
According to Mathers, when it comes to achieving goals, "Consistency is more important than the standard of any one step." He advises to break down steps into smaller, more manageable ones, and to not stop doing them. Keeping it simple and breaking down "what it is you need to do into the smallest piece" will propel you forward.
2. Acceptance is the key to inner peace
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The desire for control is a common thread for most people. We want to control our futures so we have some sense of stability. We want to control our emotions and our day-to-day lives. While this impulse is part of the human experience, the hard truth about life is that we actually have no control over it at all.
Dating coach Sabrina Zohar shared advice she learned from her therapist to help alleviate emotional pain, based on the Dialectical Behavior Therapy technique of radical acceptance. According to Zohar, "Radical acceptance is a distress tolerance skill that helps you keep pain from turning into suffering. Essentially, what that is, is that you stop fighting reality. You stop reacting with destructive behavior and you handle situations for what they are in the moment. Ultimately, at the end of the day, you can't control other people, you can only control yourself."
Zohar continued to say that radical acceptance "is a means where you finally accept the situation for what it is and release the control around the situation that you don't have." This means "living in the moment and accepting the situations as they are, and not trying to change them or create a narrative in your head about them." And no matter how the situation turns out, you accept it.
The idea that we can control how other people act or how they show up — or don't show up — keeps us stuck in patterns that don't serve us. Accepting what you can't change allows you to keep moving forward and create the life you want, which builds a foundation for a peaceful existence.
3. You're in charge of your own happiness
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Relying on external validation to feel happy, secure, and confident doesn't actually work. Outside influence might make you feel good in the moment, but that kind of happiness tends to be hollow and short-lived. We can't expect other people to tend to our emotions, which includes how happy we are.
Stephanie Harrison, the author of the book "New Happy," shared science-backed habits to help people feel happier, starting with the habit of treating oneself with love. Harrison advised people to seek progress over perfection, saying, "We are the happiest when we are moving toward the goals that matter most to us. Identify what progress you can make [each] day and then make that your priority."
Harrison continued to explain that we should put our happiness and joy first, adding, "Make time for your projects, for the things you're passionate and excited about. Invest in your relationships... take the time to really nurture those relationships. It could be a quick message or a phone call, doing them a favor, helping them out, spending time together."
It's easy to feel like happiness is something that either happens or doesn't happen, rather than something we can build with our daily actions. Believing that you have agency over your emotional well-being is empowering, and that feeling can lead to a more fulfilled life.
4. Being an adult means doing things you don't want to do
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Being independent and autonomous is a privilege, yet that privilege comes with responsibilities you can't actually avoid. Supporting yourself as an adult involves a certain amount of discomfort. Waking up early, going to work, and only getting two free days each week isn't most people's idea of a good time, but it's a necessary task. Spending half your paycheck to replace your car battery isn't as fun as seeing your favorite band or going out to eat, but not fixing the problem will only make your life harder.
While honoring yourself and your needs is important, there will inevitably be parts of life that aren't enjoyable or in alignment with your passions, but you have to do them anyway. It's one of many hard truths boomers believe Gen Z needs to accept.
5. Mistakes are inevitable
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According to boomers, Gen Z should accept that making mistakes is inevitable, yet it's how they handle being wrong that makes a difference. Getting defensive and avoiding accountability is a natural human instinct when we're confronted with mistakes we've made, but that response stunts our emotional growth and limits our ability to connect with other people in a genuine way. Learning to accept responsibility for being wrong is one of life's hard truths, but it's the kind of hard truth that leads you toward being your most authentic self.
Therapist Jeff Guenther revealed that holding yourself truly accountable is the only way to heal, yet not everyone will be able to meet you on that journey. If you've taken accountability, apologized genuinely, and understand your mistakes you've made toward another person, but it's still not enough for them, it probably won't ever be enough. But instead of beating yourself up, adds Guenther, "You don't have to feel guilty or ashamed anymore, because that's what they want you to feel. You don't have to live inside their narrow vision of a past self that you aren't anymore."
Instead, you should be proud of yourself and your accomplishments. Guenther concluded that you should also "Be with your community. Surround yourself with people who love you, appreciate your growth and can do the hard work of evolving with you."
6. Good health isn't guaranteed
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As boomers move up in years, they've gained first-hand experience of the aging process, both the good parts and the hard parts. Getting older provides people with a stronger sense of self, which means they're able to release what's not important to them and embrace what is. But the wisdom of each passing year also brings major health changes, like loss of hearing, vision, and mobility, along with general aches and pains.
The hard truth that there's no guarantee for good health is something Gen Z has taken to heart, as various studies and surveys have shown. They actively consider how their physical health and psychological well-being will impact their future and they take care of themselves in the present.
A survey by the American Heart Association reported that 75% of Gen Z worried that having health issues would prevent them from experiencing everything they want to do in their lives, compared to 63% of boomers. According to a report from the American Psychological Association, 37% of Gen Z have gone to therapy or received mental health treatment, compared to 22% of boomers. Gen Z seems to fully understand the hard truth that good health is a gift that builds upon itself.
7. Everyone has their own hardships
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Every generation experiences some form of struggle, yet what's important is the way they navigate those storms. Being self-aware and emotionally intelligent helps people become resilient, a trait that ultimately helps people survive the challenges they face.
The American Psychological Association defined resilience as "the process of adapting well in the face of adversity, trauma, tragedy, threats, or significant sources of stress." Resilience is something people can cultivate by focusing on four core components: connection, wellness, healthy thinking, and meaning.
Connecting with people who can offer empathy and validation in times of emotional distress is a reminder that you're not actually alone. Practicing self-care and mindfulness helps people manage stress and find hope in the darkness. Seeking out opportunities for growth allows people to find their purpose and make meaning in their lives.
Boomers might think that gentle parenting trends and technology has made younger generations too soft and sensitive, yet that belief overlooks the resilience and level of emotional attunement that Gen Z has.
8. Just because you want something, doesn't mean you'll get it
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Everyone has the right to have desires and express them, yet desire, in itself, doesn't automatically translate to any tangible reality. Having dreams, not just practical goals, is crucial to keeping a sense of hope and purpose in a difficult world.
It's a hard truth that life doesn't always deliver in the way we want it to, but grasping that truth makes the disappointment sting a little less. Even if people don't get exactly what they want, they can still find their true selves and live a purposeful life, as therapist Susan Saint-Welch explained.
"In order to be content and happy with your life, you must first find your true, authentic self," she shared, noting that authenticity comes from living in a way that aligns with your values and the core aspects of your identity. "Finding yourself means becoming aware of those around you, what makes you happy and what does not, and when you feel good about yourself and when you don't."
9. Staying in your comfort zone will only hold you back
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Trying new things and putting yourself out there can be scary things to even consider, let alone act on. Anticipatory anxiety often keeps people from reaching for the opportunities that have the capacity to expand their lives. While sticking with what you know might feel safe, it prohibits people from moving forward.
Ed Latimore, a retired professional boxer and influencer, shared his perspective on self-improvement as a method to create lasting change. He explained that people are enamoured with the outcome of improving themselves, but dislike the process, noting that "the process is the way to the outcome."
But people who stay in their comfort zones and don't aim for improvement will never know how strong and capable they really are. Adds Latimore, self-improvement "takes time and effort to build new health habits, repair old relationships, create new ones, and acquire skills." Yet the impact of those changes can bring people closer to being their fullest selves.
The only way people grow is by stepping beyond what they already know and actively seeking ways to improve, which is a hard but necessary truth. For many people, discovering who they really are lasts for the course of their lifetime, but it's work that's entirely worth committing to.
10. You need practical skills to thrive
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The rapid-fire pace of technological development means that all the world's information is accessible with one swipe of an index finger, yet having immediate access to knowledge doesn't mean people actually learn essential skills.
Being born as digital natives gave Gen Z a foundational understanding of how to exist online, which is crucial information, yet having a grasp on practical life skills is equally as important. Knowing how to cook meals and do household maintenance makes daily life easier and saves money, since having those basic skills means people aren't paying someone else to take care of those tasks.
Boomers might complain that Gen Z is glued to their phones, but they overlook that being chronically online affords Gen Z the opportunity to watch tutorials on YouTube and find expert advice on TikTok, so they can pick up those practical skills.
11. Change is the only constant
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According to boomers, a hard truth Gen Z should accept is that change is the only constant aspect of life. This hard truth can be an especially difficult one for people to swallow, no matter how old they are.
Part of the human experience is our enduring attempt to find stability, only for any sense of security to shift at a moment's notice. It's not easy to walk into each new day, knowing that we don't actually know how anything will go, yet acknowledging this hard truth is a universal touchpoint of growing up.
Alexandra Blogier, MFA, is a staff writer who covers psychology, social issues, relationships, self-help topics, and human interest stories.