10 Phrases You Will Never Hear A Resilient Person Say
Resilient people never give up, no matter what life throws their way.
Pavel_Kostenko | Shutterstock Resilience is an extremely valuable trait that helps people adapt quickly to changing situations. Whether someone with this trait had a bad day or has been feeling down lately, there are certain phrases you will never hear a resilient person say.
People who are resilient understand what it takes to overcome hurdles, and refrain from speaking words that negatively impact themselves as well as others. They tread carefully and avoid approaching situations with a defeatist attitude. As such, this mindset benefits them and increases their likelihood of success.
Here are 10 phrases you will never hear a resilient person say
1. 'I can't handle this'
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During tough moments, people feel like the weight of the world is on their shoulders. Feeling trapped and overwhelmed, they might secretly tell themselves that they're unable to handle the situation. However, for truly resilient people, this thought would never cross their minds, and they certainly would never verbalize it.
People who grew up having to depend on themselves know just how capable they are in handling tough circumstances. They dealt with it when they needed to take care of themselves on a daily basis and when they entered the world as young adults. Truly resilient people know just how tough they are and refuse to doubt themselves, even for a second.
2. 'I don't need help'
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It's understandable why many people are independent. Perhaps they were forced to become adults much sooner than normal, or they find that they achieve more on their own. Whatever the case, in a world that has become less friendly and trusting, the ability to lean on others has become a foreign concept for most.
But resilient people understand that they can't do everything themselves. Even during their lowest moments, they know how helpful and efficient it is to ask for help from family and friends, and even people they don't know that well. With a mindset like this, resilient individuals learned to conserve their strength and lean on others when they need it most.
And, according to a study from the American Journal of Epidemiology, people who have stronger connections are less likely to pass away early, compared to those with weak social connections. It shows just how important it is for everyone, even resilient people, to depend on others every once in a while.
3. 'I give up'
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When times get tough, as they do for everyone at some point, some people tend to give up hope and succumb to their despair. Unfortunately, a lack of motivation, according to a study published in the Linguists Journal of Linguistics and Language Teaching, leads to an academic decline in students, especially.
But even outside of academia, losing motivation can lead to a person feeling stuck. For resilient people, however, they see the best in everything. Rather than give into hopelessness, they choose to fight every day. They don't give up nor do they let their willpower falter. As hard as it might be, they keep pushing forward, regardless of whatever challenges come their way.
4. 'This is pointless'
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"This is pointless" is one of the phrases you will never hear a resilient person say, as they are always pushing themselves forward to overcome anything. But there's a lesson to be learned regardless of how supposedly insignificant things may seem. Whether it's a lesson in finances or in appreciating your relationships, everything has a purpose. For those who remain open-minded to experiences, they find it easier to succeed and learn from past mistakes.
A study published in the Journal of Clinical and Experimental Neuropsychology found that the personality trait of openness leads to higher intelligence and divergent thinking. For resilient individuals, finding beauty in new experiences helps them keep on, keeping on.
5. 'I don't deserve this'
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When things don't pan out the way someone expects, it's easy to allow self-doubt and insecurity to creep in. Feeling cheated, most people will say they didn't deserve whatever good thing came their way. But saying, "I don't deserve this," won't change the outcome, and resilient people understand this better than anyone else.
People who are resilient know that playing the victim won't benefit them, which is why they choose to brush things off and try again. Instead of telling themselves they don't deserve something, their never-give-up attitude helps them stand on their own two feet, and is incredibly admirable.
6. 'I don't want to fail again'
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Failure is a sore spot for most people, as it's not a comfortable feeling and can cause individuals to lose hope that they will ever find success. The fear of failing in front of others, especially, can lead to burnout, as one study published in Environmental Research and Public Health found. As the study determined, resilience for athletes, specifically, is necessary as it protects them from experiencing that burnout.
It's humiliating for someone to stand in front of friends and family and say they lost out on a specific opportunity, whether it was for a new job, new home, or new adventure. But avoiding failure is like avoiding breathing: it's simply impossible. When looking at the most successful people in the world, they have one thing in common: their ability to fail and keep moving forward.
Failing and getting up to try again is respectable and can mold people into successful, resilient people. They've learned from their past mistakes and used it to keep pushing ahead.
7. 'I'm not good enough'
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People may not realize this, but the words they say have a huge impact on their behavior. According to a study published in the journal PAIN, negative words can lead to an increase in stress and anxiety, changing people's behavior for the worse. That said, resilient people know better than this, which is why they refuse to put themselves down, choosing instead to put a positive spin on everything.
Resilient individuals tend to hype themselves up and repeat that they are good enough. They are always working on finding ways to improve themselves, which is why the phrase "I'm not good enough" is something you will never hear a resilient person ever say.
8. 'Why does this always happen to me?'
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According to Keith M. Bellizzi, a professor of Human Development and Family Sciences, the brain is hardwired to resist change. It's why many people have a hard time letting go of toxic relationships or circumstances. In truth, their brain is struggling to let go of what's familiar to embrace the unknown.
For resilient people, they find ways to get comfortable with the uncomfortable. They understand that their brain naturally might hold them back and they use that knowledge to convince themselves that breaking toxic cycles is okay. They turn the phrase "Why does this always happen to me?" into, "How can I prevent this from happening again?" And that creates all the success and prosperity they desire.
9. 'I don't care anymore'
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Part of being resilient means possessing an unwillingness to give up. It means that when times get tough or seem unbearable, resilient individuals still find a way to make the best out of a bad situation. That's why you will never hear a resilient person say, "I don't care anymore," because, in fact, they care an immense amount.
Don't expect a person with this mindset to throw in the towel right away or stop fighting for themselves. The opposite is true; they will keep pushing, keep striving, no matter how difficult things become for them. At the end of the day, they really do care and they show that care through their hard work and consistent effort.
10. 'There's nothing I can do'
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Resilient people are incredibly hard workers and somehow find a way to make the impossible happen. Amid failure, they continue to educate themselves on what they can do differently next time to have a more positive outcome.
According to a research paper from the University of West Georgia in Carrollton, consistency has been shown to have a positive impact on students' grades. According to the authors of the paper, "Student advisors should emphasize that 'studying hard' (total minutes) is not as important as 'studying smart' (consistency)."
That said, remaining optimistic isn't easy. Even the strongest people sometimes feel hopeless as they constantly fail or fall behind. But by continuously trying, they'll eventually accomplish great things and prove how resilient they are.
Marielisa Reyes is a writer with a bachelor's degree in psychology who covers self-help, relationships, career, family, and astrology topics.