If You’ve Accomplished These 11 Things, You’re More Successful Than An Average Person
Success means different things to different people, but these accomplishments mean a lot.
Photoroyalty / Shutterstock Everyone defines success differently. Some people measure success according to their jobs, their wealth, and their material possessions. Others base their sense of success on the strength of their relationships and how they feel about themselves. While success is fairly subjective, if you’ve accomplished certain things, you’re more successful than an average person.
In psychological terms, success can be defined as "achievement of intention" meaning you accomplished what you set out to accomplish, whatever that might be.
A big part of being successful comes from feeling fulfilled and nourished in the life you lead. Comparing what you have to what other people have won’t make you successful. Comparison will fill you with self-doubt, which holds you back from reaching your potential. It’s important to remember that people experience success according to what matters most to them, and everyone’s journey is unique.
If you’ve accomplished these 11 things, you’re more successful than an average person
1. You’ve channeled your authenticity
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If you’ve channeled your authenticity and let your fullest self shine through, you’re more successful than an average person. Showing up for yourself in an authentic way requires dedicated self-reflection. You’ve spent time thinking about what makes you feel most like yourself and put those parts of yourself out into the world.
Cultivating your authenticity isn’t easy, but doing so can bring you success and self-confidence in huge measures. Consultant and well-being expert Tchiki Davis explains why authenticity can be hard to access.
“We’re just trying to fit in, be liked, and be accepted by other human beings,” she points out. “Being yourself can feel risky, and it is. But if you have to hide who you really are, you can end up feeling lost, lonely, or even worthless, because you are basically telling yourself that who you really are isn’t okay.”
“Rather than letting fear drive our self-expression, we need to learn how to accept ourselves so we can truly be who we are,” she reveals.
Davis shares that being authentic means accepting yourself as you are and talking back to your inner critic. It means being vulnerable and celebrating your strengths. Ultimately, channeling your authentic self means owning every part of yourself and announcing to the world that you are exactly enough, just as you are.
2. You’ve committed to life-long learning
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If you’re continually learning, you’re more successful than an average person. Some people believe success means reaching a tangible endpoint. They equate success with mastery, and believe once they’re successful, they’ll have nothing left to learn. Yet true success is, in fact, the opposite of knowing everything. True success means admitting you don’t know everything and you’re ready to keep learning.
Just as curiosity is a marker of high intelligence, it’s also a sign of success. People who are successful in their professional roles get there by taking on challenges and being adaptable, both of which require a commitment to learning new things. Being open to change is a requirement of being successful, and that kind of mental flexibility can be acquired by teaching yourself new skills and letting others teach you, too.
3. You’ve established purposeful goals
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If you’ve established purposeful goals and worked toward achieving them, you’re more successful than an average person. Your goals shouldn't be so huge that you can’t actually reach them. Goals should be practical and accessible, while pushing you to do your best work.
Coaches Orna and Matthew Walters share that the key to reaching your goals is building up confidence and believing you can get there, which can be done by adjusting your mindset.
“How you think about accomplishing your goals is just as important as the series of planned actions to achieve a goal,” they explain, noting that the first step to being confident and achieving your goals is to change your inner dialogue.
“How you speak to yourself has a direct effect on how you feel about yourself,” they reveal. You have to pay attention to how you speak to yourself and “notice if you're kind and compassionate towards yourself or if you're critical and judgmental.”
“In order to boost your confidence, speak to yourself in a way that empowers you to keep moving forward,” they advise.
“You're only trying to be better today than you were yesterday,” they conclude. “Track your progress, let your efforts count, and continue to foster an inner dialogue that's supportive.”
4. You’ve shifted your perspective when it comes to challenges
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If you’ve shifted how you view challenges, you’re more successful than an average person. It’s easy to look at hardships as roadblocks that keep you from reaching your full potential. Yet the truth is that everyone’s life journey has their own challenges, it’s how you approach them that makes a difference.
Believing that you have the power to push through challenges requires shifting your mindset. As coach Alex Mathers explaines, “The secret to achieving anything you want comes down to two words: Thinking small.”
“Wins feel good,” Mathers acknowledges. “Feeling good drives us forward, saturating our souls with creative power. Knowing that we can achieve is life-giving. Believing in ourselves and having the faith that we can achieve even the smallest success is vital.”
He shares that the key to success comes down to acknowledging your growth points while setting surmountable goals.
“All we need is for the steps to be small enough so that we can complete the task daily, despite our other commitments, and that we don’t stop doing them,” Mathers concludes.
Approaching challenges with persistence by taking small steps makes you more successful than an average person.
5. You’ve made mistakes
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You might think success is synonymous with perfection, but the reality is that those two things stand nowhere near each other. If you’ve made mistakes and owned your imperfections, you’re more successful than an average person.
Part of pushing yourself and aiming to win will inevitably mean losing. Not all the time, but at least some of the time, you won’t get what you want. The value of making mistakes can’t really be overstated, since doing things wrong is how you learn to get it right.
Part of accepting mistakes as inevitable involves having a growth mindset. While someone with a fixed mindset equates making mistakes with being a failure, having a growth mindset means you see mistakes as opportunities to learn and grow.
Being scared of mistakes will hold you back in life, as that fear means you won’t step out of your comfort zone to try something new. If you’re making mistakes, you’re already more successful than an average person.
6. You’ve held yourself accountable
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Holding yourself accountable is an accomplishment that shows you’re more successful than an average person. Most people are terrified to take responsibility for things they’ve done wrong, or things they haven’t done at all. Holding yourself accountable is a sign of success because it shows you’re willing to change.
As psychotherapist F. Diane Barth explains, “Taking responsibility does not mean never making a mistake,” but rather, it means acknowledging your actions and working to show up differently next time, which can positively impact your sense of self.
“Knowing that we can make changes gives us a sense of agency, a feeling of power over what we do and don’t do, and a sense of competence,” Barth concludes.
7. You’ve built a support network
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If you’ve built a support network of people who care for you and who you care for in return, you’re more successful than an average person. Investing in your relationships is an indicator of personal success. Putting in the time and effort to get to know people who will show up when you need support means you’re successful, because you’re harnessing the power of your community. Having a support network means giving when you can give and receiving when you’re in need, both of which are needed.
If you have people in your life who push you to grow, who inspire you and love you as you are, you’re more successful than an average person.
8. You’ve learned to communicate with intention
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If you’re always working to communicate directly and clearly, with honest intention, you’re more successful than an average person. You fully understand that communication is the key to having healthy relationships, but you also know that it’s often harder than it seems to communicate with clarity.
Professor Yvonne K. Fulbright reveals that “the trick is discovering how to express yourself amid the sea of emotions that can quickly submerge your best efforts.” She explains that a major part of strong communication isn’t about what you say, but rather, how you listen.
“Communication needs to be a two-way street,” she shares. “If you expect your partner to hear you out, then you need to make yourself vulnerable to any reaction, especially the need to reflect back on what you’ve just said.”
Staying present in a conversation is as important as taking the space you need to process what’s been said, and expressing gratitude for the connection you have with your partner will always raise your communication efforts to a higher vibration.
9. You’ve taken time to have fun
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If you’ve taken time out of your daily routine just to have fun, you’re more successful than an average person. Having fun is a simple practice that will make you feel good. Having fun boosts your mood and keeps your mental health balanced.
In his book, “The Fun Habit: How The Disciplined Pursuit of Joy And Wonder Can Change Your Life,” psychologist Mike Rucker writes, “Happiness is a state of mind. “But fun is something you can do. It doesn't require education, money or power. All it requires is intentionality.”
Rucker shares that fun requires being active and intentional. Fun can involve other people or be done alone, but it’s something you choose for yourself and it gives you a sense of awe and wonder that goes beyond your ordinary experience.
Your version of fun might involve blowing bubbles while listening to disco music. It might be taking a walk and leaving your phone at home. Whatever your definition of fun is, seeking it out regularly makes you happier, healthier, and more successful than an average person.
10. You’ve focused on cultivating close friendships
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If you’ve focused on making and keeping close friendships, you’re more successful than an average person. Staying socially connected is the antidote to loneliness, as psychologist Guy Winch explained in a conversation with YourTango CEO Andrea Miller on the “Getting Open” podcast.
Winch noted that loneliness can trick us into feeling more alone than we actually are.
“That’s what loneliness does — It convinces us that the people who we have, who are dear to us, who care about us, don’t care as much. And then it makes us reluctant to reach out and that reinforces the loneliness and it’s a very difficult spiral,” he said.
Winch shared that the quality of relationships is more important than the quantity. In the end, it doesn’t really matter if you don’t fit in with the popular kids or you have only a few friends. If the people in your life see who you are and love you for that, then you're more successful than an average person.
11. You’ve separated your achievements from your self-worth
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If you’ve drawn a line between what you’ve achieved and your sense of self-worth, and you’ve accepted that you’re worthy regardless of those achievements, then you’re more successful than an average person.
Psychotherapist Susan Saint-Welch pointed out that having a strong sense of self-worth exists at the core of living your purpose and being your truest self.
“Feeling good about yourself is different than just being happy,” she explained. “It means you recognize something you do well or a quality that makes you feel like a good person. It is a sense of feeling worthy, that you matter and can make a difference in this world.”
You might drive a fancy car or have a powerful job, but you know that your worth doesn’t depend on those things, which is why you’re more successful than an average person.
Alexandra Blogier, MFA, is a staff writer who covers psychology, social issues, relationships, self-help topics, and human interest stories.