12 Types Of Men Who Make Very Bad Partners
The signs aren't so obvious at first, but never settle for less than you deserve.
MAYA LAB | Shutterstock The types of men who make very bad partners often struggle to keep their relationships. A report by Pew Research Center found that 51% of men under 30 were increasingly likely to be single.
And though men are facing a loneliness epidemic, there are a few behaviors that certain types of men engage in that make finding love nearly impossible. Women who observe these behaviors should take note, as they indicate a relationship that can become unfulfilling and unhappy.
Here are the 12 types of men who make very bad partners
1. Men who never grow up
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Men who make very bad partners don't want to grow up. They often have Peter Pan syndrome and are emotionally immature.
An important part of relationships is the ability to step up. But men who can't or refuse to do so risk overwhelming and undermining their partner. Additionally, men who believe that vulnerability is a sign of weakness are bad partners, as they tend to not be serious about real issues in their relationship.
Immature men who can't be bothered to make an effort to express themselves end up causing irreversible harm to their partner. So, women should do their best to avoid these types of men who don't want to grow up.
2. Men who think the world revolves around them
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Men who are selfish and believe the world revolves around them are the types of people who don't make good partners in romantic relationships. These selfish men don't know how to give and take in a relationship, leaving their partner frustrated.
They don't fully appreciate their partner's sacrifices, and really only pay attention to the small amount of effort they put into the partnership. They are full of themselves, have a huge ego, and think their partner's effort is just the way things should be.
This arrogance doesn't lead to a sustained, long-lasting relationship; rather, it creates an uneven partnership where one partner's needs don't matter. And without mutual respect and balance, it simply won't last.
3. Men who don't take accountability
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Another of the types of men who make very bad partners are those who never take responsibility for their actions, even when they are at fault. They can't be bothered to admit their wrong-doings, and instead spend their time blaming their partner.
They lack the ability to self-reflect, even though self-reflection is a key component needed to grow as an individual and strengthen relationships. Men who make very bad partners avoid self-reflection if it means keeping their ego intact.
This can create division and anxiety in the relationship, as their partner wonders what they're doing wrong. They will spend so much time focused on being perfect that they eventually neglect their own needs, turning a beautiful relationship into a disaster.
4. Men who glorify jealousy
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Men who make bad partners tend to convince women that being jealous is a sign of love. While it's human nature to be jealous at times, too much jealousy is toxic. Unable to confront problems head-on, these types of men resort to possessive and overly controlling behavior to protect their relationship, not realizing that the relationship they're trying so hard to protect is unhealthy.
According to 2021 research, people who have higher levels of emotional dependency have more jealous reactions. Additionally, having high dependence is a precursor of intimate partner violence.
Women should be wary of men who use jealousy to get what they want, as it can quickly devolve into something more sinister.
5. Men who refuse to set boundaries
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Setting boundaries is essential in telling people, especially someone you're involved with romantically, what is and isn't okay in a relationship. Unfortunately, men who won't set those boundaries do so to avoid uncomfortable conversations and shirk their responsibility to their partner.
Men who struggle to set boundaries risk losing their relationship, as their partner is sure to become fed up with the constant arguing and inconsistency. These types of men need to hold themselves accountable and find ways to implement small boundaries. Otherwise, they may end up lonely, repeating the same cycle from their previous relationships.
6. Men who are moody
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While moodiness can be a sign of a mental health condition, for men who have this specific behavior in their relationships, it can be frustrating to the partner. They don't know what they want, confusing their partner and making them walk on eggshells constantly. They act "hot and cold," wanting commitment one minute, but feeling unsure the next.
Research from Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin found that unstable, fluctuating relationships lead to a decrease in relationship confidence, life satisfaction, well-being, and an increase in psychological distress. For women dealing with this behavior, it's probably best to distance themselves from this type of man, as they make a bad partner.
7. Men who break promises
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Another of the types of men who make very bad partners are those who never keep promises. They may promise to take their partner out, but cancel plans at the last minute. They may promise to be at their partner's side during a difficult time, but then can't be bothered to offer emotional support.
With this type of man, women tend to feel let down all the time, causing issues and creating doubt in their relationship. They may also feel betrayed. And, according to research published in Behaviour Research and Therapy, the effects of betrayal can lead to shock, loss, grief, anger, second-guessing, and damaged self-esteem.
8. Men who lie compulsively
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It's actually good for people to lie sometimes, like when their friend cooks a meal that doesn't taste good or their family wants input on their new home accent pieces. But men who constantly lie to the point it becomes compulsive make bad partners. And they end up damaging the trust in their relationship, leading to an inevitable breakup.
These types of men may do their best to move forward afterwards, but don't see a need to change their lying ways. Because, as a compulsive liar, they tend to have low self-esteem, according to research from the journal Psychological Studies.
Women ought to be on high alert around men who lie constantly, as they make awful partners.
9. Men who are overly flirtatious
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Men who make very bad partners may flirt with others in front of their partner. Whether it's at a party or even an important work event, they don't know how to keep their behavior in check. They may become touchy-feely and ignore their partner in favor of giving undivided attention to someone else. They may even physically cheat with someone else.
These men don't understand nor care how their actions make their partner feel. They are self-absorbed, care only about what they want, and perhaps don't always realize that their flirty behavior causes irreversible damage.
Research from the journal Personal Relationships found that partners who flirted with other people online experienced a shift in thinking. Researchers determined that flirting outside of a relationship causes people to judge their partner more negatively and as less attractive.
This shift in thought can quickly put an end to an otherwise healthy relationship if these types of men aren't careful or don't take steps to change.
10. Men who can't control their temper
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Instead of being a grown-up and taking accountability, men who can't control their temper tend to become easily irritated by every little thing, pinning the blame on their partner at times. They may scream or accuse their partner of purposely triggering them, while secretly being gleeful that they have a justifiable reason to explode.
Constantly channeling their anger to their partner will only result in fear. Additionally, research from the journal Emotion found that partners who have self-reported anger have an increased risk of intimate partner aggression. Partners are increasingly likely to engage in aggressive behavior.
11. Men who are apathetic
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While there's nothing wrong with being low-key and relaxed, as life requires us to take some time to ourselves every now and then, in a relationship apathy spells disaster.
These types of men make bad partners because they don't quite understand the value of showing up in their relationship. Dressing in sweatpants every day, not planning dates, and not taking the initiative to tackle household chores are all examples of this apathy.
Women want to feel like the men they love are still trying and still care, no matter how long they have been together. They want to feel important, but when they are with apathetic men, it hurts the relationship. Men who act like this don't feel the need to put effort into the relationship, plain and simple.
12. Men who can't keep a secret
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The types of men who make very bad partners are those who can't keep a secret to save their lives. Trust is the foundation of healthy relationships, but unfortunately, men like this prefer gossiping over reliability.
They may discuss their partner's business with others, not seeing it as a big deal. Or, they might even accuse their partner of taking things too far when they call them out on their sneaky behavior. Partners need to be able to rely on each other, so women should avoid men who can't keep secrets in confidence.
Marielisa Reyes is a writer with a bachelor's in psychology who covers self-help, relationships, career, family, and astrology topics.