Mom Asks If It Was Wrong To Wear A Bikini To Her Kids' Swim Lessons After Other Parents Said She Made Them Uncomfortable
When she asked if they were bothered by her husband not covering up at the pool, they said it didn't matter since he didn't have a "baby belly."
Paul Hakimata Photography | Shutterstock When a mom signed her four kids up for swimming lessons, she was excited to see them learn a new skill and spend time with them. However, instead of having fun, the lessons left her feeling insecure about her body.
She never could have imagined that her choice of swimwear would spark controversy among the other moms at the lessons. In a Reddit post, the mom revealed that her two-piece bathing suit made other parents at the lessons “uncomfortable.”
The mom was told that her two-piece bathing suit made other parents ‘uncomfortable’ since they could see her stretchmarks.
The 27-year-old woman shared that she is the mother to two-year-old quadruplets. This year, she decided to sign all four of them up for swimming lessons.
Since they were just starting out, the swim instructor required that each child have an adult guardian in the water with them. The woman’s husband and two of his friends also came along so that each child had an adult looking after them.
Evgeny Atamenenko | Shutterstock
“At the lessons, all the other kids had their mothers/female guardians with them, and all of them wore shorts/shirt swimsuits,” the woman noted. “My husband/his friends had trunks with no shirt, and I wore a two-piece. Nothing bad, everything was well covered, but obviously my stomach and back showed.”
The mom was comfortable with her swimsuit and didn't think it was an issue until a few mothers approached her in the locker room after the lesson.
“They and a few other mothers were uncomfortable with how I was wearing a two-piece to the lessons all week,” she wrote. “They suggested if I do another class with my kids here, I cover up my stomach because nobody wants to see it because of the stretch marks from my pregnancy.”
The woman pointed out the double standard, asking the mothers if they had an issue with her husband and friends not wearing shirts in the pool; they said they didn’t care because they didn’t have a “baby belly.”
Shamed by the other parents, she turned to Reddit, asking if she was in the wrong and whether she should change her choice of swimwear for future classes. “I never thought about it, so maybe it’s my fault for being careless and not thinking of everyone else,” she wrote. “My husband says I was fine, but all the mothers there apparently don’t think so.”
Most people assured the mom that she had done nothing wrong and that the other parents had no right to dictate what she wore.
“Their rudeness and entitlement is grosser than any stretch marks,” one Redditor commented. “Does everyone have an obligation to cover every body part that is different/damaged/unusual?”
“You've had four babies. Your body is the way it is because it carried them, and I'm glad that shame didn't occur to you, or at least not prior to these women feeling entitled to tell you to hide,” another user wrote.
“They were being very rude. ‘No one wants to see that' is an absolutely vile thing to say to anyone, and if they were so offended by your stretch marks they can simply look away,” another noted.
bmcent1 | Canva Pro
Instead of shaming a fellow mom for her physical appearance and the swim attire she chose to wear, the other women in the swim lessons should have praised her for confidently and unapologetically wearing what made her comfortable without worrying about her stretchmarks being visible.
Stretch marks are a completely normal part of womanhood, and 90% of females will have them on their bodies at some point in their lives for a multitude of reasons, including pregnancy.
While societal expectations may make women feel as if their stretchmarks are something they need to hide, they are as ordinary as having teeth — and how often do we laugh and smile and others see our teeth!? Not every woman is going to have a cellulite, stretchmark-free figure, despite what the media depicts.
There is no need to shame women who show what an authentic and realistic body looks like.
Additionally, the behavior of the other moms is not one that should be modeled for their children. If anything, they should be teaching them that not all bodies look the same, and what one person is uncomfortable wearing may be suitable for another.
We do not always have the same ease wearing a two-piece as others, and that is okay! However, it is not okay to ridicule those who do and force them to wear what you are “comfortable” with them wearing. Stretch marks are not inappropriate, especially when they reflect the strength and beauty of bringing four babies into the world!
Megan Quinn is a writer at YourTango who covers entertainment and news, self, love, and relationships.