Husband Shares The Drastic Career Downgrade His Wife Had To Take After Moving To The US To Be With Him — 'I Ask Myself Is It Worth It?'
She went from a high-level tech career to working in a warehouse, and it's rapidly taking its toll.
EugeneEdge | Shutterstock Whether it's the challenging job market or the high cost of necessities like groceries, America isn't exactly the "Land of Opportunity" it once was to many people in other parts of the world. One Redditor's experience with his foreign wife is a perfect example.
Since leaving South Korea to join him in the U.S., the man's wife has taken a drastic career downgrade, and it is rapidly taking a toll — not just on her psyche, but on her body too.
The woman took a drastic career downgrade in the U.S. to be with her American husband, and he's worried it wasn't worth it.
His wife's story is an all too common one for many people who immigrate to the United States. "By moving to the U.S. in 2021," the Redditor wrote in his post, "she gave up her career as a front-end web developer and has not been able to find a similar position since."
"Now she works at a warehouse so we can make ends meet, and has given up on her former career," he went on to say.
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If you've lived in a big city and take a lot of taxis or Ubers, you'll likely meet immigrant drivers who were doctors or professors in their home country.
I used to teach English, and one of my students was a well-known lawyer back home in Venezuela, but in the U.S. she worked in a daycare because none of her education, even her bachelor's degree, was acceptable in the U.S.
It's a common dilemma immigrants face — made even worse by the exorbitant costs of re-educating themselves in the States, and worse still by the punishing nature of many of the jobs immigrants can get. Such is the situation this man and his wife have found themselves in.
The punishing schedule and back-breaking labor of his wife's American job is taking a toll on her physical and mental health.
Between the way her credentials don't transfer to the U.S. and the waves of layoffs in the American tech industry, the man said his wife's career goals are pretty much "dead" at this point.
"This hardly makes it the land of opportunity," he wrote. "And now, she's moving heavy boxes."
She works her job in a warehouse under the kind of nightmarish conditions that many employees of companies like Amazon have described — long hours, insufficient days off, and hard, physical labor at a pace that has left his wife in debilitating pain.
"People keep quitting because they're being pushed to the limit," he wrote. "The majority of senior team members have left for the military as a way to get out."
He likened it to "slave" labor in which they're "forced to go beyond protocol standards with limited resources and people."
He says seeing his wife in so much pain 'isn't worth it,' and they are considering moving back to South Korea.
"I give my wife so much credit," he went on to say. "She's an amazing person and an extremely strong woman — mentally and physically."
They moved to be closer to his family, to be able to buy a home with their help, with a yard for their kids. Instead, despite how grateful he is for the financial help of his family, he feels like they've been duped. "It's hard to justify living here," he added. "When I see my wife in pain, I ask myself, 'Is it worth it?'"
They both work so much that they don't even have time to eat dinner together, and they've completely sworn off having kids due to financial considerations. "I look out at [our] yard … and I feel like what's the point? Ain't nobody playing in it."
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"I love her so much and want what's best for her," he went on to say. "This life is NOT it. I need to do whatever I can to help her. And if we move back to Korea, it'll be obvious why."
That's precisely what some told him to do. But others who've come from or lived there said South Korea's work culture and economy are, in most cases, just as brutal as the United States, and the cost of living is often much, much higher.
And South Koreans are so averse to having children because of similar issues that the government has proposed paying people an approximately $76,000 incentive to have a baby.
It's hard to know on which side the grass would be greener for this couple, and it's a testament to what runaway capitalism has done to countries all over the globe that their options are both so punishing. Hopefully, they find a way through it, and the future brightens — for all of us.
John Sundholm is a news and entertainment writer who covers pop culture, social justice, and human interest topics.