Stepmom Refuses To Babysit Her Stepdaughter's Kids — 'I Was Forced To Watch My Younger Siblings Until I Left At 16’
No one should be forced into babysitting against their will.
fizkes / Shutterstock After a woman showed up with her kids at her stepmom’s house expecting help with childcare, she was shocked when her stepmom refused.
Sadly, not everyone is up for babysitting, especially when it was forced on them from a young age.
The stepmom took to Reddit to ask if she was wrong for telling her stepdaughter she doesn’t want to babysit for anyone’s kids, including hers.
In the since-deleted AITA post, the stepmom explained that she had never wanted kids.
“I was forced to watch my younger siblings (four of them) until I left at the age of 16,” she wrote. “I greatly dislike babysitting and never had my own children. Never have been comfortable around young kids after that.”
Her husband has three kids who were in their 20s when they got married.
“I am not a mother figure to them at all, just their dad’s wife,” she disclosed. “Overall, I got along well with the three adults.”
When one of his kids, who she referred to as Kelly, got pregnant, her husband’s family was excited by the news of their first grandchild.
“I made it clear I didn’t want to babysit, and when grandkids were around, my husband was to be the main caretaker,” she explained. “My husband agreed.”
She said the baby’s first two years went well and described her husband as an “awesome grandpa.”
“I am fine being the relative that brings toys and other fun stuff once in a while,” she said.
Recently, Kelly has been trying to persuade her stepmom to take on a traditional grandma role since her mother-in-law is not involved. Kelly has even suggested her stepmom start babysitting rather than her own dad.
After her husband went on a work trip, Kelly showed up to drop her kids off anyway.
The stepmom’s husband usually babysits on Mondays, and even though he informed his daughter he wouldn’t be available and canceled, she still showed up, hoping she could sway her stepmom.
“I asked what she was doing since her dad wasn’t here,” the stepmom wrote. “She told me that I need to step up and babysit. That she doesn’t care if her dad isn’t here, I am present. I told her no.”
“This went in circles for a bit and got more heated the longer we went,” she added. “I told her, 'I don’t want to watch any … kids, and that includes yours.' She is pissed.”
While her husband respected her decision, his kids were less than pleased.
To be fair, on the stepmom’s behalf, Kelly was out of line in attempting to force her kids onto her stepmom and additionally expecting her to go back on her clearly communicated stance.
“There's no excuse for her behavior whatsoever,” one Reddit user commented in reference to the stepdaughter. “You said no, you told her why, and she still pushed it. That's on her.”
“Nobody owes stepdaughter babysitting either. They are her kids. Her responsibility,” another person commented. “Why would you want to force your kids on someone who doesn’t want to be with them? That’s so bizarre.”
The stepmom has the right to choose not to babysit, considering her past experiences.
If anything, it’s admirable that she had the strength to say no, even in the face of her desperate stepdaughter. Many women would have likely given in to her demands, but the stepmom refused and stood her ground.
Kelly was bold to pressure her stepmom to be more involved when she was clearly uninterested in pursuing such a role.
It’s unknown how involved Kelly’s biological mom is in her life. Still, her behavior seems to indicate that she was trying to push a grandmotherly role onto her stepmom against the woman’s will.
While she may genuinely wish for some extra help, as Reddit users pointed out, her kids are her own responsibility, and it's wrong for her to expect others to babysit for free. She can’t force others to help if they don’t want to, and it is not her place to overstep her stepmom's boundaries.
The stepmom never expressed any issues with the child. She seems to be supportive and happy for her stepdaughter, but she simply does not want to feel responsible for babysitting, and that’s a right she is entitled to!
Francesca Duarte is a writer on YourTango's news and entertainment team based in Orlando, FL. She covers lifestyle, human-interest, adventure, and spirituality topics.