Woman Shares The 3 Hilarious Ground Rules When It Comes To Naming Your Baby
You are not just naming a baby. You are naming a potential corporate leader.
Elizaveta Galitckaia / Shutterstock A woman has issued a very important PSA for parents-to-be who need help naming their babies (and in this day and age, there are many of them who could use some guidance).
She urged people to take her advice seriously to avoid a future generation filled with elderly men named “Bradyn.”
The woman shared 3 hilarious ground rules when it comes to naming your baby:
There are millions of names, and it can be hard for parents to settle on one for their child. However, before choosing a name, Sydney (@sydyeets) advised parents to consider three important ground rules to make life easier for their children.
“It has come to my attention that we need to set some ground rules because we are about one weird name away from society becoming a full-blown "Hunger Games" dystopia novel,” Syd said in a TikTok video.
1. Would the name survive the ‘middle school bully test?’
Middle schoolers can be notoriously catty and cruel and will find anything they can to tease their peers over. An unusual name will surely make your child an easy target.
If they don’t want their child coming home from school crying every day that someone else made fun of their name, Sydney encouraged parents to avoid going with names other children will sneer at and used the name “Orca” as an example (it will be even worse if you send them to school dressed in black and white).
2. Can you imagine a co-worker addressing them in an email?
“They have this name for life, not just when they’re a baby,” Sydney reminded parents.
“I personally like the greeting, ‘Good afternoon.’ I think it sets the tone in emails, but what the [expletive] am I supposed to do if my co-worker is named ‘Afternoon?’”
“Or even worse, what if my co-worker’s name is ‘Baby?’ If I address an email, ‘Hey Baby,’ I just signed up the entire office to do an extra video module of training because that is not okay.”
If you have even the slightest doubt that a potential name will cause issues once your child is a working adult, don’t go with it.
3. Can you spell it out over the phone to customer service without screaming in rage?
Sydney used her own name as an example of what she meant.
“Whenever someone asks me how that’s spelled, I just say, ‘With a Y, like the Sydney in Australia,’” she shared. However, even some customer service representatives have difficulty understanding that.
“I cannot imagine if I’m on the phone with a customer service rep already pissed off, and they ask me how to spell ‘Odyssey’ or ‘Etheral,’” Syndey noted.
She begged parents-to-be to “get real” and stop giving their children ridiculous names because they want to be extraordinary.
“Our generation is already criticized too much. The next one is screwed.”
New Africa / Shutterstock
When it comes to naming your baby, it is important to keep in mind that it is not all about you. Your child is going to have whatever name you choose for them for the rest of their lives.
For their sake, please make sure that it is a name that won’t get them teased, will be easy to spell to spare you all the headache, and a name that will suit them as an adult.
When you name a baby, you are naming an elementary schooler, a potential college graduate, and even the future president of the United States.
Megan Quinn is a writer at YourTango who covers entertainment and news, self, love, and relationships.