Mom Goes 'On Strike' After Reaching A 'Crisis Point' With Her Husband — 'It's Like Being A Single Mother With An Inconsiderate Roommate'
She's admitted to her husband on more than one occasion that she feels as if she's drowning from his lack of support.
NDAB Creativity | Shutterstock A woman admitted that she ended up reaching her breaking point with her husband due to his lack of consideration and support.
Posting to the subreddit r/breakingmom, she claimed that her husband leaves almost everything up to her to complete, and she's sick of it.
She went 'on strike' after reaching a 'crisis point' with her husband.
In her Reddit post, she explained that most of the struggles she faced at home were because of her husband and compared it to being a single mother with an inconsiderate roommate.
Despite having a full-time remote job, while her husband worked 10 minutes away from their house, she was tasked with completing most of the chores, household responsibilities, and childcare.
aslysun | Shutterstock
"Everything is on me. Groceries, planning and making the meals, cleaning, budgeting, bookkeeping, the little fixes in the flat, laundry, buying clothes/shoes ... the school, activities, homework, school outings ... every simple thing," she detailed. The list went on and on, including things that her husband could take care of on his own but simply chose not to.
Instead, her husband's only contribution came from working 40 hours a week and transferring his salary into their joint bank account. She pointed out that she envies her husband's laid-back attitude when it comes to household responsibilities and childcare. He comes home from work and just puts his dishes in the sink after eating dinner. He'll do the bare minimum and start the laundry machine if his wife has already put the clothes inside, but he won't take them out or hang them up to dry them.
Sarah Chai / Canva Pro
She admitted that on the weekends, all of the family planning comes down to her, to the point where she finds herself resenting her husband and hoping he'll just up and leave their family one day.
However, their relationship wasn't always about her giving 100%, while her husband gave none.
"We talked and talked and made sure we wouldn't be one of those couples where the mom is overworked and on edge and the husband.... acts like a baby. Well, guess what, I am that cliché after a year and a half of things going down," she continued.
A majority of mothers are often tasked with doing most of the household and childcare responsibilities.
According to a Pew Research Center survey, roughly six-in-ten (59%) say the mother plays a larger role in managing their children’s schedules and activities, while just 5% say the father does more, and 36% say the parents share this responsibility equally. Mothers also tend to take on more household chores and responsibilities; 41% of married or cohabiting parents say this is the case in their households, compared with just 8% who say the father does more. Half say they and their partner share household chores and responsibilities about equally.
Renee Reina, a content creator and mother, explained during an episode of her podcast, "The Mom Room," that generally, it's women and mothers taking up the best parenting strategies for their children compared to men and fathers.
"For the most part, it’s moms who are following parenting accounts, who are listening to parenting podcasts. So we’re gathering all of these tools to be able to manage certain situations with our children — whether it be a meltdown or tantrum [or] bedtime struggles."
During an interview with HuffPost, Reina added, "The issue arises when your partner does not do the same or doesn’t take an interest in these parenting-related topics, and now you’re having to basically teach them what you have learned so you can both be on the same page."
This exhausted mom admitted that she was 'drowning' from her husband's lack of initiative.
She acknowledged that while her husband isn't aggressive or mean, he's just indifferent and disconnected, which ends up being worse since he's completely oblivious to the needs of his family and his wife. She's told him countless times that she feels as if she's drowning whenever he doesn't pick up some of the load but rather dumps it all on her.
"I can't be the only one caring," she wrote. However, her insistence that he should be more attentive just ended up falling on deaf ears. He hasn't changed and it's just becoming endlessly frustrating to try and make him. Unfortunately, this is an issue that many women and mothers can heavily relate to. An equal partnership means that no one person in the relationship should be tasked with stretching themselves thin when they should be receiving help and support.
There's nothing more telling than a wife who feels as if she's the hired nanny for the family, and she, along with any other wife out there, shouldn't be tasked with having to sacrifice their mental well-being because their husbands don't get the memo of needing to step up.
Nia Tipton is a Chicago-based entertainment, news, and lifestyle writer whose work delves into modern-day issues and experiences.