6 Ways To Use The Power Of Silence To Massively Improve Your Life
Quiet down and see what happens next.
Andrea Piacquadio / Pexels We’re often taught that the best way to make a strong impression is to be loud, to take up space, and to make sure everyone notices you. Yet this belief overlooks an even more dynamic trait: Being quiet.
Here are 6 ways to use the power of silence to improve your life:
1. Don’t jump to defend yourself
Insecure people tend to talk more than they listen, especially to prove a point. They often hide their mistakes and play up their accomplishments, as though they’re not just as fallible as the rest of us.
It’s one thing to celebrate your wins and another thing altogether to brag about them.
Confident people have a certain kind of self-awareness that insecure people lack. Instead of building themselves up, they’re comfortable just being themselves. They know that making mistakes is an essential part of being human.
They know that mistakes are opportunities to learn and grow.
Staying quiet amplifies your greatness.
2. Don’t complain
It’s easy to complain when life doesn’t go our way, but what does complaining actually accomplish? Not much, and it keeps you stuck in a negative place, where you’re only thinking about what went wrong and not all the opportunities that lie ahead.
Instead of focusing on everything that’s disappointing you, shift your mindset. Flip the script: Think about what you do have and feel grateful. Work on changing what’s in your power to change and learn to accept what isn't.
It’s important to recognize that complaining is different from advocating for yourself, which is always an important skill to have. If someone’s crossed the boundaries you've set or treated you or others unfairly, speak up in a way that will create change, not just point blame.
3. Emphasize actions over words
What you do matters so much more than what you say you’ll do. Making empty promises only gets you so far, until the people in your life begin to trust you less.
As they say, talk is cheap. Focus less on talking about your plans and put more energy into making your goals a reality.
Don’t just say you’ll do something. Get out there and do it.
4. Respond, don’t react
Cato the Elder said, “He approaches nearest to gods who knows how to be silent, even though he’s in the right,” which is a fancy and ancient way of saying that you don’t always have to prove you’re right, even when you are.
Being right doesn’t always win an argument. Rather, seeing the other person’s perspective and holding space for their emotions makes you the wiser person.
5. Be mindful of what you say
It’s easy to get stuck in certain patterns of communication that don’t serve you. It’s part of human nature to gossip, but spreading rumors only serves to hurt people, in the end.
Learn how to hold your tongue and hold yourself accountable for how your words affect others.
A major part of being a strong communicator is knowing when to speak and when to listen. Hone your skills by listening more than you speak, asking intuitive questions, and giving people time to tell you what’s on their mind.
6. It’s okay to be still
Learning to be alone is one of the greatest gifts you can give yourself.
Photo: fizkes / Shutterstock
We live in a world that’s built around constant, unending access: With the swipe of our finger across the phone screen, we can discover literally anything. There’s no limit to the knowledge we seek, which can lead to a specific and destructive kind of overwhelm and burnout.
Information overload is more common than ever, but there are ways to combat it. Spending time away from your devices, with just your mind and body, might seem scary, but it’s a very healthy practice and a great way to reset. There are benefits to boredom.
There’s power in learning to be quiet with yourself — You never know what you’ll discover.
Alexandra Blogier is a writer on YourTango's news and entertainment team. She covers social issues, pop culture, and all things to do with the entertainment industry.