Life Coach Explains The Difference Between Feeling Burnt Out & Having A 'Burnout Mindset'
"I was consciously trying to create less stress in my life, but subconsciously creating more."
Kaspars Grinvalds / Shutterstock We’ve all dealt with the stress of a full-time job or the chaotic nature of managing a household. Navigating daily life, juggling all of your responsibilities, and trying to act like “a normal person” is a feat in itself by 5 p.m.
Of course, everyone needs occasional breaks and rest from all of this hustle and bustle. Without it, the looming consequences of burnout get closer and closer, ready to forcefully shut down your motivation, productivity, and mood if you ignore the importance of rest.
However, as life coach Peter Guse pointed out in a recent TikTok, there’s a big difference between dealing with burnout and dealing with a “burnout mentality” — two things that can easily develop in response to stress, overwhelming responsibility, and insurmountable pressure.
Understanding the difference between feeling burnt out & having a ‘burnout mindset’ can be the key to unlocking real rest, according to Guse.
“I thought that I was just another burnt-out corporate millennial when I left my full-time job two years ago," Guse admitted at the start of his video. "I thought by taking a break from work and taking some time to focus on doing my own thing would be the solution.”
However, it quickly became clear that a week away from work with a destressing regime wasn’t going to be enough to heal him from burnout. Why? He’d developed a “burnout mentality” — where he was subconsciously seeking out stress in every avenue of his life, instead of trying to get rid of it.
Feeling burnt out, usually from work, school, or social interactions, is characterized by overwhelming stress, exhaustion, and anxiety.
Characterized by physical and mental exhaustion, feelings of anxiety and overwhelming stress, and a lack of energy, burnout typically is fueled by increased stress in life. Whether it be caretaking responsibilities, a full-time job, or family stress, people often experience the symptoms of burnout when they ignore the need for rest.
Instead of recognizing the typical indicators of exhaustion, and taking actionable steps to get rest, people struggling with burnout likely waited until they were forcibly required to take a break. By that point, they were unable to focus on work, couldn’t get out of bed, or just felt overwhelmed with their typical workload.
Healing burnout can look different for everyone, but the bottom line is that it requires real, thorough rest. Seeking support from others, getting some sleep, and practicing mindfulness activities can be the keys to getting back on track.
A ‘burnout mentality’ is present in people who are ‘addicted to stress’ and who find worthiness in their productivity and work ethic.
As Guse suggested, people with “burnout mentalities” are not simply healed by rest — they have an underlying issue that prevents them from properly destressing.
“Turns out the first week that I didn’t have anyone to report to and I could actually just rest, my brain had different ideas,” he admitted. “It was busy reminding me that rest is lazy and that if I don’t do something more productive today, then that future worst-case scenario of being poor and homeless will come true.”
People with this kind of mindset value their work ethic and productivity over everything else in their lives, even their own well-being. Many people, including Guse, develop this mindset early in life when their academic performance, maturity, or “busyness” define their identities.
“I thought that I just needed to do more yoga and meditation and sleep more. Turns out I had more than just a dysregulated nervous system," Guse shared. "Turns out I was addicted to stress.”
Typical burnout is healed by rest, while a ‘burnout mentality’ often requires more intentional methods of therapy to unlearn.
“My mind was constantly seeking out evidence to confirm that my subconscious belief that I picked up at 10 years old was true: that my level of worth came from my level of productivity,” Guse explained.
Although he was consciously trying to destress, things continually got more overwhelming. While doing yoga, he was thinking about all of the things that were piling up at work. While drifting off to sleep, the first thing that came to mind was “falling behind.”
As many commenters admitted, this phenomenon is far from unique, especially in our work-driven culture. With so many things tied to work, from citizenship to insurance and social help, it feels impossible to separate our value as employees from our value as humans. However, this is the key to unlocking real rest — to unlearning the “burnout mindset” that’s plaguing people across the country.
Zayda Slabbekoorn is a news and entertainment writer at YourTango focusing on pop culture and human interest stories.