6 Uncomfortable Signs You're Emotionally Healing, According To A Holistic Psychologist
Growth isn't linear, so remember to trust the process.
fizkes / Shutterstock It can be difficult to recognize our own emotional growth and progress. When we come face-to-face with personal changes and challenges, our inner conflict often causes us to lose sight of how far we’ve come.
Sometimes, the uncomfortable things we experience are actually a testament to our growth and healing, even if it doesn’t seem so.
Dr. Nicole LePera, a holistic psychologist, took to Instagram to explain how these discomfiting, and sometimes painful, signs contribute to emotional growth and healing.
Here are 6 uncomfortable signs you're emotionally healing, according to a holistic psychologist
1. You’re spending more time alone
Solitude often feels daunting and isolating at first, but it can help individuals reconnect with themselves and reflect on their feelings, problems, and experiences.
According to Enlightened Solutions, “It allows you to do the hard work of going inward to process your pain and fears, to sit with yourself and grow stronger in your sense of self, to ground and center yourself in your purpose.”
If you find yourself feeling more introverted and comfortable in your own space, exploring the simple pleasures of being home, like curling up to read a good book or cooking a homemade meal, this is a sign of healing!
It means you are creating space for self-discovery and developing a strong bond with yourself. You are allowing yourself to rest and relax in your own presence, and this can actually improve your relationships with others.
2. Relationships that no longer serve you come to an end
A true sign of alignment with your healing is the end of certain relationships, be it romantic, platonic, or even familial. People come and go, it’s a part of life. When someone no longer serves your highest purpose, the universe will remove them from your life. Even though it may hurt to lose people you once cared deeply for, sometimes this is for the best.
“The person we were years ago isn't the person we are today. So, it's natural that some relationships will end. This creates space for new people to enter our life,” Dr. LePera explained on X.
3. You feel lost and confused
A natural part of one’s healing journey is the feelings of confusion that accompany it. Healing is going to feel scary and uncertain, but it’s during uncertain times that you rediscover yourself.
The process of healing requires taking big steps toward your self-improvement, but this also means acknowledging the darkness of your shadow self and past experiences. This might result in you questioning your purpose in life, but don't worry, this is all a part of the process.
According to Jada Butler, a holistic health and wellness coach, “Embrace these moments as invitations to delve deeper into self-discovery. Reflect on your passions, values, and what truly brings you joy. Trust that the answers will come in due time, and your journey of healing will lead you towards a purposeful and fulfilling life.”
4. You have the courage to see your childhood for what it truly was
It takes courage to acknowledge the pain of your childhood so you can heal your inner child. Dr. LePera explained that a majority of people find it too painful to retreat to their childhood traumas, so they “deny its relevance,” but this will only further trap individuals in repetitive cycles of trauma.
When you actively intend to acknowledge the wounds from your past, you’ll come across several unwanted memories and triggers, but doing so will help you develop a greater sense of self-awareness.
Adopting this awareness can help you better navigate healthier coping mechanisms, reconnect to your passions, dreams and talents, and cultivate increased self-esteem and self-compassion.
5. You're aware of the dysfunction behind what society considers 'normal'
Emotional healing means you have woken up from the restraints of society. When you feel you can no longer relate to the unhealthy conditions of societal norms, this means you are no longer in denial about the world around you.
While this may cause you to feel like an outsider, you aren’t the only one waking up from the dysfunction, and this awareness proves your desire for authenticity and self-care.
Choosing to ‘unsubscribe’ from society’s dysfunction is a sign that you’re prioritizing your own needs, values, and desires, rather than following what society pushes you toward. "You're choosing to [live] for yourself, not for approval from others," Dr. LePera wrote.
6. You fall into old patterns (and gain more clarity from them)
Lastly, a surprising sign that you’re emotionally healing is falling back into the same old patterns.
While this behavior commonly gets mistaken for receding backward, by embracing the opportunity to reflect and learn — rather than beating yourself up for these natural circumstances, or worse, staying stuck in these patterns — you demonstrate clear emotional growth.
As Dr. LePera explained, “Old patterns are wired into our subconscious mind and nervous system.” Repeating the same old patterns is a natural part of healing, and it will take time, repetition, and reflection to break these habits.
Although it may feel like you’re stuck in a loop of repetitive behaviors, each cycle will bring you a stronger sense of clarity about who you want to be.
Find peace in the discomfort of your healing, as it will all lead to a greater sense of purpose and meaning.
People tend to romanticize healing journeys as linear, rewarding paths toward growth — but the truth can be quite the opposite. Individuals who work to heal from their past traumas will experience moments of ongoing, unresolved pain and anxiety, and sometimes it may feel as though there is no progress.
While these signs of emotional healing may be uncomfortable and discouraging to experience, they are essential for growth, transformation, and ultimately, finding peace and healing.
If any of these signs resonate with you, trust that you are following the right path toward healing your emotional traumas, and your hard work will pay off. Remember to trust the process, be patient and empathetic with yourself, and seek support from trusted family, friends, and health professionals when needed.
Francesca Duarte is a writer on YourTango's news and entertainment team based in Orlando, FL. She covers lifestyle, human-interest, and spirituality topics.