Man Kicked Out Of His Father's Funeral For Saying He Was 'A Terrible Person' During An Impromptu Speech
While some people criticized his actions, suggesting it was not the appropriate time or place, others believed he had the right to speak his truth.
Kzenon / Shutterstock Not everyone has the relationship with their parents they hope for. Some parents do not even speak to their children, let alone know anything about them.
One man decided to expose his father’s unacceptable treatment of him and his family at his funeral. However, not everyone agreed that it was the time or place for him to do so.
The man called his father a ‘horrible person’ during a speech at his funeral.
Sharing his story on Reddit, the man revealed the heart-rending details about the relationship between himself and his estranged father.
“My dad was a bad person,” the man wrote in the now-deleted post. “He did a lot of bad things and didn’t care about his wife and kids. My mom divorced him when I was very young and I had no relationship with him.”
When he was notified that his father had died, he admitted he was hesitant about attending the services, but claimed he was "bullied" into going. “I was told that if I don’t then I am a bad person and other things.”
What truly irked him, however, was, once there, he noticed that everyone in attendance had nothing but good things to say about a man he viewed very differently. He felt compelled to say a few words of his own that more accurately described the deceased.
“Before the main service, I stood up in the crowd outside and said that he was actually a terrible person and listed some of the things he did do,” the man wrote.
His speech was not well received by the other guests. “Everyone was shocked and I was told to leave,” the man shared.
Some people believed the man’s father's funeral was not the appropriate time and place to share his true feelings.
“Grow up. Get therapy. Who cares if people say you’re a bad person for not honoring a bad person? If you can’t say anything nice to people grieving someone they love stay at home,” one Redditor commented.
“If you were so worried about the pressure they were putting on you, you wouldn’t have been able to do what you did,” another user wrote. “You have issues and you decided that the other people grieving were going to suffer because you were hurt.”
However, others believed that the man had the right to speak about his negative experiences with his father, even if it was at his funeral.
Photo: RichLegg / Canva Pro
“When people complain that this was neither the time nor place, and you just know they will, it is exactly the time and place (one of the few times I will say this). They invited you to not a funeral, but to a lie and wanted you to give them cover for their phony memorial,” one user noted.
“This was a natural consequence of his actions while alive and the actions of those who coerced you into coming. You are absolutely entitled to speak your truth about your dad,” another user wrote.
While the man’s feelings are completely valid, a public service honoring his father’s memory was likely not the ideal time to share those feelings with others.
Funerals are intended to honor and celebrate the life of the deceased, and focusing on their positive qualities and memories is more appropriate.
Not everyone who knew the man’s father experienced the same version of him that he did. Criticizing or speaking ill of him could have caused further discomfort and pain to grieving loved ones and went against the spirit of honoring their memory.
The man’s father may have hurt him; however, it would have been wiser of him to disclose this with his family members privately rather than announcing all of his father’s wrongdoings at a service where he was meant to be grieved by his loved ones.
Megan Quinn is a writer at YourTango who covers entertainment and news, self, love, and relationships.