Boyfriend Believes The Valentine's Day Flowers His Girlfriend's Dad Gives Her Every Year Are 'Creepy'
He believes that grown women should not be receiving Valentine's from their fathers.
Harbucks / Shutterstock Valentine's Day is a time filled with romance, an opportunity to show the people you care about just how much you love them.
One woman is feeling conflicted, however, after her boyfriend claimed that her father’s sweet gestures toward her on Valentine’s Day were inappropriate, going as far as to label him “creepy.” The woman disagreed with her partner's evaluation and shared that her father has always treated her like a queen on Valentine’s Day, regardless of her age.
Feeling uncertain, she took to the r/relationship_advice subreddit, asking others if her boyfriend had a point and if her father’s actions were unsettling.
The 23-year-old woman revealed that ever since she was a little girl, her father has gifted her chocolates and flowers on Valentine's Day.
“He'd always give them to me when I was little, when I went to college and beyond he had them delivered to me,” the woman wrote. “It's just a tradition for us. I think it's sweet, I grew up in a really tight-knit, close family.”
Photo: ValeryMinyaev / Shutterstock
A little over a year ago, the woman began dating her boyfriend, Mark. When Valentine's Day rolled around, she got the usual delivery of chocolates and flowers from her father. That first year, Mark didn’t make too much of a fuss over the delivery; however, this year, while the couple discussed their upcoming Valentine’s Day plans, he had more to say.
The woman’s boyfriend told her that it was ‘creepy’ that her father sends her flowers and chocolates every year for Valentine’s Day.
"He made a passing comment about hoping I don't get any 'creepy gifts in the mail this year,'" she shared. “I was confused and asked him what he meant, and he said, ‘You know, how you got that stuff from your dad last year. It's creepy for a dad to be sending his adult daughter Valentine's Day gifts.’” the woman wrote.
She admitted that Mark’s comment surprised her. “It's not like my dad sent me lingerie or something!! It was just flowers and some chocolate,” she noted. “I tried explaining to Mark that this is a tradition I have always shared with my dad. He stands firm that it's ‘creepy’ and ‘weird,’ and he said he asked his friends and they thought it was weird too.”
Photo: Evgeny Karandaev / Shutterstock
Although the woman tried to let Mark’s comment about her father’s Valentine’s Day gifts roll off her shoulders, she confessed that it had been bothering her lately.
“I have never heard these kinds of negative comments from Mark before and am not sure whether it's a ‘red flag,’” she wrote.
She added that she does not want Mark to feel “uncomfortable” when she receives her father’s gifts on Valentine’s Day this year.
“Is it actually creepy for my dad to be sending this stuff?" she asked Redditors. "I have never found it so, but would like to hear other perspectives.”
The majority of people found the Valentine's Day gifts from her father sweet — not creepy.
“I’m 38 and I have gotten a Valentine’s Day gift from my parents every year. There’s more than just romantic love to be celebrated,” one Redditor shared.
“My dad sent me and my daughter flowers until he passed a couple of years ago. I’m 53 now," another user wrote. "Your dad is making sure you also know that he loves you and thinks of you. This is not creepy or weird."
“I'm a dad of two girls and this makes me sad that a father showing love for his daughter is thought of as creepy. Every year I get my girls a piece of jewelry, and flowers and take them to dinner,” a third user wrote. “You have a limited amount of Valentine's Days with your dad on this earth. One day, he won't be around to send you your cherished Valentine's gifts.”
Valentine's Day is not exclusively about romance.
It can also be a celebration of other kinds of love, including that between parents and children. In fact, a 2016 survey conducted by TODAY.com found that 85 percent of parents report buying gifts for their children on Valentine’s Day.
“I love you” is not a statement that is reserved solely for romantic partners. A father expressing his affection through a Valentine's Day gift for his children should be seen as a heartwarming gesture rather than a creepy one.
Megan Quinn is a writer at YourTango who covers entertainment and news, self, love, and relationships.