How To Figure Out Which Of These '5 Christmas Girl Vibes' You Have & What They Say About You
Christmas vibes are like Christmas cookies — no two are alike, and we all think ours is the best.
Halloween is over, November has begun, and this all means one thing: It's officially Christmas time, whether you like it or not.
And if you're not so secretly happy we've entered into "the most wonderful time of the year," you definitely have a whole Christmas vibe, right? But which one? And what does it mean?
A TikToker has narrowed holiday lovers down to '5 Christmas girl vibes' that describe your Yuletide aura.
Yes, I just said "Yuletide aura" and, as a gay man, I know of what I speak — much like the girls, most of us are either Halloween Gays or Christmas Gays. It's just one of those rules none of us made or agreed to but, nonetheless, we all follow.
It's much like how Mariah Carey's yearly "it's tiiiiiime" shtick means the holidays have officially begun even though we haven't celebrated Thanksgiving yet.
This is just how things work, so we all might as well lean into it! And this is precisely what TikToker Allie Balfour, a self-described "holiday enthusiast," proposes we do by digging into what our Christmas Girl vibe is.
Likening them to different Christmas aisles in a store, Balfour explained that "there's five very specific vibes for Christmas," and while many of us mix-and-match a bit, "generally, you stay on that aisle because that is your vibe."
"I had to explain this to my husband," she went on to say, "because my husband and I are very different vibes, so I thought it was so funny, and I feel like nobody talks about it."
Here are the the "5 Christmas Girl Vibes" Balfour has identified.
1. The Traditional Christmas Girl
Do you love a good red-and-green tartan? Do you covet a nutcracker? Do you go absolutely feral the moment you see a gift wrapped in brown butcher paper tied up with a buffalo-plaid ribbon? Then you are what Balfour dubbed "a Traditional Christmas Girlie."
The dead giveaway for these girlies? "The red trucks. Like, if you are down the aisle and you see the red trucks and they're, like, calling to you, you are traditional Christmas." That makes so much sense. I don't know why, but it just does. As does the moose decor Balfour pointed out.
What is with the moose decor every year?! If you automatically know the answer to that question, you are a Traditional Christmas Girlie, antlers and all.
Photo: KlavdiyaV / Shutterstock
2. The Glam Christmas Girl
These girlies are all about luxury and making their house look like a Neiman Marcus every year. "Glam Christmas just has, like, a lot of whites, golds, silvers," Balfour said. It's about GLITZ, it's about GLAMOUR, it's about making other people feel POOR, but in a festive way!
Telltale signs that is one of the 5 Christmas girl vibes you rock with? "I think if you have a flocked Christmas tree that is very on brand for Glam Christmas," Balfour explained. "Or if you put the ornaments in a bowl for decoration" — and we all know that girl — "very on brand."
Balfour also said if you're the type who matches your Christmas decor to the decor of your house, you're definitely Glam Christmas. Traditional Christmas Girlie is to Dolly Parton as Glam Christmas Girlie is to, say, Kim Kardashian. You are untouchable. Unknowable. You may or may have bullied Mrs. Claus in high school. Glam Christmas.
Photo: Tatyana Berdo / Shutterstock
3. The Peppermint North Pole Christmas Girl
"My husband loves this," Balfour confessed. "This is who he is. His favorite movie is 'Elf.' 'The Grinch' and 'Elf.' If you love those movies, you love this vibe." I'll be honest, this is not my cup of tea. It feels very "Disney adult," and that is my truth and I need to be able to express it in this sacred, safe space!
However, as Balfour said, the Peppermint North Pole Christmas Girlies are the "jolliest" of the 5 Christmas Girl vibes, and there's no doubt that in today's world, we need your whimsy.
We need all the elf-themed, peppermint-printed, light-hearted zaniness of you gals who do the Whoville-themed Christmas trees Balfour highlighted as central to this vibe. We need it all so bad! You go, Cindy Lou Who or whatever your deal is!
Photo: Unique Creative Arts / Shutterstock
4. The Woodland Christmas Girl
This one's all about "greens, the pine trees, the browns, like bears, deer, little trees," Balfour detailed. "There's a lot of green. There's not that much red."
It's giving Colorado pine forest, it's giving the snowy wilds of Lapland, it's giving "I cut these pine boughs myself with my traditional Scandinavian garland shears because the nearest town is 400 miles away and you are definitely going to die here."
Okay, that last part is a bit extreme and might be the plot of a Christmas-themed reboot of "Misery," but you get my drift. Woodland Christmas Girls, which include Balfour herself, like to keep things simple, austere, and earthy. "If you like pine cones in your tree, definitely a big sign that you're a Woodland Christmas girl," she said.
Photo: Mariya Zhitnaya / Shutterstock
5. The Blue Christmas Girl
You are low-key. You are cozy. You are clinically depressed and decorate your Christmas cookies with crushed Zoloft. You are a Blue Christmas Girl.
Just kidding, of course — that's more the vibe of the Elvis song that probably inspired this trend. But these gals are "kind of snowy," as Balfour put it, with lots of blue lights and shades of blue and snow flocking with a blue tint and blue ribbons and blue ornaments and... everything is blue.
The Blue Christmas Girl spits in the face of your red and green theme! And while Balfour didn't say so, I feel it needs to be mentioned for everyone's safety — I sense in my bones that Blue Christmas people and Traditional Christmas people cannot and must not mix. Maybe that's why Elvis was so depressed — some Traditional Christmas girlie wisely broke things off because sometimes you just know. You know?
Photo: Tatsiana Tsyhanova / Shutterstock.com
Anyway, there you have it — the 5 Christmas Girl vibes. Now, go hit your aisle at Target before all the good stuff is gone and you have to fight off the marauding hordes of Peppermint Christmas Girls. You know how they like to tussle!
John Sundholm is a news and entertainment writer who covers pop culture, social justice, and human interest topics.