Woman Refused To Give Her Husband’s Pregnant Mistress His Possessions After He Passed Away — Now She Wonders If She's Wrong
She wonders if her grief is clouding her judgment, but the mistress' requests are undeniably shocking.
RichLegg, daseaford, Lina Vanessa Merchán Jimenez, Pavel Danilyuk | Canva Infidelity is always challenging. But one woman's struggle with her unfaithful husband quickly spun out into the kind of drama mostly reserved for soap opera plotlines. Somehow, she has been able to handle it with the kind of grace and empathy most of us could never muster, even as her husband's mistress has made some truly shocking demands.
The woman is recently widowed, and her husband's pregnant mistress is demanding his possessions.
The woman explained in a post on Reddit that she and her now-deceased husband had come to an inflection point in their marriage when she found out that he had a one-night stand with a co-worker.
"We entered counseling and were still living together but obviously it was hectic," she detailed.
But that "hectic" situation was nothing compared to what happened next. Weeks after finding out about the affair, her husband passed away in an accident. While in the midst of grieving this incredibly complicated situation, she got a call that complicated things even further.
"The affair partner reached out to me," she wrote. "She's five months pregnant and preparing to raise the baby."
Her husband's pregnant mistress began making demands of the widow, including that she give her his wedding ring.
Right off the bat, the mistress' requests seemed a bit out of line. "She wanted me to tell his family because she wants her child to have a relationship with his family and be connected to his culture," the widow wrote in her post. "I said I wouldn't do this and simply passed along their contact information."
Naturally, drama ensued when her husband's family found out, but they've slowly come around to the idea of having a relationship with the baby that is coming. The drama could have ended there, but the mistress began making even more demands.
"The mother has gotten back in touch with me to ask for some of my husband's possessions," the widow said. "She wants his clothes, his books, his record collection, and bizarrely his wedding ring. For the baby to feel connected to its father."
Of course, wanting a few mementos is understandable. But his wedding ring? That seems incredibly out of line even in the most charitable reading of this story, and it's left people on the internet absolutely shook.
Understandably, the widow refused and the issue has become a contentious one between her and the mistress. It's also resulted in her in-laws getting involved, who have demanded a paternity test and have since hired a lawyer. Despite it all, the widow is insisting on being magnanimous in a way most of us wouldn't be able to manage.
"I may set up a trust fund for [the baby] when they're an adult with his money because I really don't need it and that seems fair," she confessed. But she's drawing the line there. "I just do not want to give this woman all I have left of my husband. I really do not trust her with any of it."
Her selfless kindness could actually have a major impact because losing a parent before birth can have lifelong effects on a child's mental health.
It's easy to understand why so many people in the comments felt this woman was going far above and beyond the call of duty to help her husband's soon-to-be-born "love child"— especially given the mistress' inappropriate demands. (I will never stop thinking about that wedding ring.) She certainly has no moral obligation to help, of course. But the wife's choice to help the baby financially is not just kind, it might actually have a major impact on the baby's life down the road.
Studies have shown that babies born to mothers who were grieving or experiencing trauma during pregnancy are much more susceptible to an array of mental health conditions, from ADHD to schizophrenia and eating disorders, which scientists say suggests that a pregnant mother's stress may have a major effect on brain development.
This of course presents an array of potential difficulties in the child's life down the road. A Swedish study found that children born to grieving mothers are also far more likely to end up on psychiatric medications for depression or anxiety, for example, which is of course incredibly costly in countries like the United States.
And helping the baby financially may also be the legally shrewd choice. Attorneys say that while the mistress would likely lose any lawsuit brought against the wife herself, she likely does have a legal claim to the husband's estate if paternity can be established.
The wife's instinct to provide for the mistress' baby is kind on a level most of us would be unable to muster, and it's a testament to her empathy and strength that she's willing to put her grievances aside where the baby is concerned. The baby hasn't chosen to be born into this mess, after all. But this woman being willing to do this even in the face of that wedding ring demand? Give her a Nobel or nominate her for sainthood or something!
John Sundholm is a news and entertainment writer who covers pop culture, social justice and human interest topics.