Man Says His Wife's Remote Job Is 'Not Nearly' As Stressful As His Manual Labor Job Since She 'Just Sits And Talks To People All Day'
She claimed that their conversation opened her eyes to how differently she and her husband view stress.
Ground Picture / Shutterstock A woman who posted to the UK-based forum, Mumsnet, revealed that she and her husband have incredibly different views on what they deem as being "stressful" after he tried to tell her that her job isn't as laborious as his.
Many people were quick to jump in with their own opinions on the reality of people working in office jobs versus those who aren't.
Her husband claimed that his 'manual labor' job is more intense and stressful than her remote job.
In her Mumsnet post, she explained that her husband works in a manual labor role and that, on a normal working day, he often works his body intensely and walks an estimated 15,000 steps. Due to that, when he gets home, he's usually incredibly tired and will take a nap.
She, on the other hand, works a remote job that doesn't require much from her physically. "I often spend the day in front of the computer, running workshops and doing lectures online (I can’t turn up 15 minutes late if people are attending a lecture so in that sense I guess my work could be considered time-critical)."
Photo: Antoni Shkraba / Pexels
Recently, though, she's been traveling to do these lectures in person and would have to drive between four to six hours a day. "[I] was worrying about this in advance as I had a 6-day working week (including international travel) last week and am feeling quite drained physically and mentally."
After voicing her complaints and worries to her husband, he was quick to argue that she had nothing to be stressed out about, at least compared to his own job. He claimed that her position is "nowhere near as tiring as his."
While that is true for the physical aspect, she still felt hurt that he was diminishing the work she does daily, and arguing that all she does is "sit and talk to people all day."
While the conversation wasn't the best, she admitted that it opened her eyes to how much of the household and parenting tasks that she does compared to her husband. "It has suddenly dawned on me that we have very different opinions on what is stressful."
People agreed that it's wrong of her husband to claim that her job isn't as stressful as his.
Under the woman's post, many people suggested ways that she could try and explain to her husband that even though she isn't physically working her body for her job, it can be just as tiresome and stressful as his.
"I have a very similar job to you and agree that it can be stressful and exhausting. The way I explain it to people is that I have to be 'on' all of the time. You can't switch off because either you're presenting/talking or listening," one Mumsnet user wrote.
Another user added, "He currently has it made, he gets to nap and leave everything to you. If he really believes that anything that doesn't involve physical exertion isn't tiring then he can take over ALL of the admin associated with running a home can't he? But I doubt he will."
"My husband used to work retail and would get really frustrated when I'd complain about being tired from my office job as he was on his feet all day and dealing with customers in his face," a third user chimed in. "He now works an office job and is wiped out mentally by the end of his week. It's taken a role change for him to put himself in my shoes. He has since apologized for not getting it."
While the woman in the Mumsnet post faced a clash in viewpoints with her husband over the perceived stress levels in their respective jobs, it marks the importance of understanding that stress is not a one-size-fits-all concept.
Photo: Keira Burton / Pexels
Every single job has moments that can be more stressful than others, and it isn't to diminish this woman's husband's manual labor job, because that is incredibly tiresome, but it doesn't mean his wife is absolved from being able to voice her own stresses.
The woman's reflection on the disparity in their perceptions of stress extends beyond just her professional life as well. She also brought to light the unequal distribution of household and parenting tasks, which only adds another layer to the discussion, emphasizing that stress seems to permeate into other aspects of her life, and happens even when she's not at work.
Every individual's experience is unique, and acknowledging the complexity of job stress is crucial for fostering healthy relationships and workplaces. In the same vein, it's important that couples make sure to distribute an even amount of household responsibilities to avoid feeling that level of stress in their personal lives.
Nia Tipton is a Chicago-based entertainment, news, and lifestyle writer whose work delves into modern-day issues and experiences.