Mom Gave Birth To Her Second Baby & Kept The Gender A Secret — Now She's Upset People Keep Asking If It's A Boy Or Girl
She expressed her frustration with people only asking about the baby and not about her well-being after giving birth.
@mommananis / TikTok A mother who welcomed her second baby opened up about how frustrating it is for people to ask about the gender.
In a TikTok video, Amairani Diaz explained that she had decided to keep the gender of her second baby a secret, which she had done during her first pregnancy. However, following the baby's birth, she began getting an influx of messages from family and friends who were only worried about the gender.
Diaz pointed out that it's frustrating when people only ask about the baby's gender instead of her well-being after giving birth.
"I just gave birth to my second baby, we kept the gender a secret [and] not even me or my husband knew what it was," Diaz began in her video.
She explained that once the baby was born, and she announced that the little one was here, she noticed that almost everyone was only asking about the baby's gender. "The first thing they ask is, 'boy or girl?'" Diaz continued.
She pointed out that her frustration lies in that being the first question her friends and family had asked her, instead of inquiring how she was doing physically and mentally after welcoming her child and going through the intense experience of giving birth.
"They go straight to the gender of the baby. I just don't get it, I find it kind of rude, I didn't even want to text people that [the] baby was here because that was the first thing they were gonna ask me and it's so frustrating," Diaz remarked.
She recalled how the same thing happened when she had given birth to her first baby as they also kept the gender a secret. Once Diaz's daughter was born, though, she claimed that all anyone cared about was whether she was a boy or a girl.
"I don't even know if people asked how I was doing, honestly, or how [the] baby was doing other than what's the baby's gender," she added. "You're gonna find out eventually, I will announce it, there's a reason why I haven't announced it yet."
Diaz's annoyance highlights how disheartening it can be for the focus to be primarily on a baby's gender instead of a mother's well-being.
Diaz's frustration echoes a broader societal trend where the focus on a baby's gender can often overshadow the experiences of new mothers. It shows that we need to cultivate a more thoughtful and empathetic approach to interacting with new parents.
The experience of becoming a mother, whether it's for the first time or not, is a significant and often complex transition in a woman's life. During this time, women are experiencing a myriad of emotions, which can only be made worse when the primary focus is on a trivial question such as the gender of the baby.
While the baby's gender is an interesting aspect that people will want to know, it's just a small part of the larger journey of parenthood. Instead, we should be engaging in conversations about the mother's well-being and providing an opportunity to discuss the physical and emotional reality of becoming a parent, either for the first time or once more.
By prioritizing questions to be about a mother's health, friends and family can create an opportunity for an atmosphere of support and understanding. Diaz's narrative should serve as an invitation to be more mindful about the conversations we engage in, and that it's important to show genuine interest in the transformative experience that happens when becoming a mother.
Nia Tipton is a Chicago-based entertainment, news, and lifestyle writer whose work delves into modern-day issues and experiences.