Husband Uses Daughter To Tell Wife She Needs To 'Go On A Run' To Lose Her Postpartum Weight
It's not only hurtful to his wife, but could potentially instill insecurities in their daughter.
@brookbrenn / TikTok The journey of motherhood is meant to be a life-altering experience filled with joy and profound change. However, amidst all of the countless emotions and adjustments, women are still held to impossible standards when it comes to their bodies.
Such could be said for one new mom, Brooklyn Brenner, who shared in a TikTok video an exasperating conversation she had with her husband about postpartum bodies and the unrealistic expectation that many women are meant to "snap back" after having a baby.
Her husband told her she needed to 'go for a run' to lose her postpartum weight.
"So, this morning, my husband and I were talking about the genetics of women and how after having a baby, some women's tummy will go down like a week or two after, and some will take three months postpartum for them to look how they did pre-pregnancy," Brenner began in her video.
Brenner had been explaining to her husband that she felt her body had gradually started to lose some of the baby weight a week after she had given birth, and that she felt her body and weight were on track to get back to how it had been before she had given birth.
Her husband's response had been troubling as Brenner said he had used their daughter's mouth to say the words: "Mom needs to go on a run."
Shocked at her husband's words, Brenner claimed that he didn't have the first clue about the tremendous effort a woman's body goes through when she's pushing a human out.
"You try having a baby deplete all your nutrients and energy levels for nine months and then pushing it out of your 'you know what,'" she sarcastically quipped.
Unfortunately, many women often feel shame and discomfort when it comes to their bodies after giving birth.
According to data acquired by U.S. News, in a survey of 161 pregnant and postpartum women between the ages of 18 and 45, researchers found that 50% reported feelings of body dissatisfaction. More than 40% said being pregnant or having a baby had made them self-conscious about their appearance.
Women shouldn't be criticized or made to feel pressured to 'snap back' and lose their postpartum weight. The process of giving birth is a profound physical experience that leaves lasting impacts on a woman's body and doesn't just end once she pushes the baby out. Part of the process includes the postpartum period, which involves healing from birth and adjusting to the new reality of being a mother.
Both pregnancy and childbirth are physically demanding processes and women never be made to feel bad about how their bodies look or that they should be losing weight at a faster rate. This societal pressure to "bounce back" quickly after pregnancy will only contribute to body dissatisfaction and feelings of inadequacy.
It's also harmful that Brenner's husband used their own daughter to relay the message that she needed to lose her postpartum weight.
While their daughter was only an infant and didn't understand the words her father used, it can still harm children, especially daughters, to hear how their fathers view a woman's body.
How a father talks about and treats women can shape a girl's expectations and understanding of relationships. By objectifying or criticizing women based on their appearance, a young girl might think that behavior is normal and even accept it from other people, which can lead to a pattern of being in unhealthy relationships.
It can also warp a young girl's perception of herself and her self-worth. If a father values women primarily for their physical appearance, it can teach his daughter that her worth is tied to her looks rather than her intelligence, talents, and overall character, leading to insecurity issues in the future.
Women already face significant body image pressure in society and the unrealistic standards of beauty that are forced upon them. It's extremely disheartening that even with childbirth, women are still expected to fulfill outrageous expectations of what a body is supposed to look like.
Every woman's motherhood journey is unique and shouldn't be used as some sort of regimen for how all mothers should look during postpartum. It's important to celebrate the incredible accomplishment of bringing a new life into the world instead of fixating on societal ideals of appearance.
Nia Tipton is a Chicago-based entertainment, news, and lifestyle writer whose work delves into modern-day issues and experiences.