Woman Details 'Awkward' Situation Of Husband Living With 'Female Friend' While They Are Trying To 'Salvage' Their Marriage
Many people pointed out that she should consider leaving her husband.
Marjan Apostolovic / LightField Studios / Shutterstock; Reddit via Canva A woman shared that she doesn't know how to navigate an uncomfortable situation involving her husband and his new roommate.
Posting to the subreddit "r/relationship_advice" — an online forum where people can share issues happening in their friendships, family relationships, or romantic partnerships — a 23-year-old woman revealed that she and her husband are trying to salvage their relationship but it's becoming difficult after he moved in with someone else.
She claimed that her husband moved in with a 'female friend' while they were trying to work on their marriage.
In her Reddit post, she explained that she and her 28-year-old husband have been married for three years, and following the birth of their first child, she's noticed a shift in her husband's behavior.
"He became increasingly irritable, aggressive, and sexually distant from me. Once he started to get physically abusive by grabbing and pushing me we decided to live at different residences in a desperate attempt to salvage our marriage," she detailed in her post.
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It's been three months since the two have been living apart, and while she's at home with her mother, working part-time and taking care of their 18-month-old son, he recently bought a new condo and has been living with a "female friend."
Upon finding out that her husband was essentially living with another woman, she was immediately uncomfortable with the idea. "We agreed that we are not taking a break in the sense of seeing others and we are still married and not going through a separation, but just trying to give each other, mainly him, space," she said.
To make matters worse, her husband's roommate acts "hostile" toward her whenever she comes over with their son. She recalled a time when she had gone over, and the entire time she was there, his "roommate" would just glare at her.
"When I asked if he and I could talk privately she said, 'No, this is our place,' and of course, this made everything awkward so I just left shortly after that," she admitted. When she tried to talk to her husband about his roommate's behavior, he brushed it off. She even added that at one point, she noticed her husband smirking whenever his roommate would act hostile toward her.
"I don’t know if I should be concerned that he and her have become more than friends, especially since my husband told me through text that [he] and I are still 'exclusive' to each other."
In the comments section, many people encouraged her to leave her marriage.
The woman's post garnered thousands of comments from individuals who urged her to leave her husband and stop trying to "salvage" their relationship since he was still emotionally abusing her despite them not living together.
Unfortunately, this circumstance is not uncommon.
According to the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence, 1 in 4 women have experienced some form of domestic abuse by an intimate partner. Abusive relationships also often follow a cycle, with periods of tension building, explosive abuse, and then a honeymoon phase where the abuser apologizes and promises to change.
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Once someone experiences their partner putting their hands on them to inflict violence, there is a strong possibility it will happen again, which many people pointed out in the comments section.
"Abusers do this, they will pretend that their partners are lying or even that they themselves are being abused," one Reddit user explained. "Taking a break isn’t going to fix him, he’s shown you who he is when he’s under pressure. And there’s lots of pressure ahead with marriage and raising kids."
Another user added, "Let her have him. This man is no prize. Go live your life as best you can and go to therapy. Heal, love yourself, and find joy. Life with this man would be misery. Soon she’ll learn that too."
Experiencing domestic abuse can happen to anyone and is not a reflection of who you are. For anyone struggling, call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-SAFE (7233). If you’re unable to speak safely, text LOVEIS to 1-866-331-9474 or log onto thehotline.org.
Nia Tipton is a Chicago-based entertainment, news, and lifestyle writer whose work delves into modern-day issues and experiences.