People Share 'Subtle Red Flags' About Others That 'Give Bad Vibes' & The Answers Show The Importance Of Trusting Your Instincts
Sometimes, small things signify that something's not quite right.
Monstera / Pexels The appearance of red flags in relationships generally signify that it’s time to take a step back and assess whether that relationship is functioning in a healthy way. Red flags aren’t always immediately clear; often, they’re small things that are part of a larger pattern.
A person on Reddit questioned how others experience less-obvious red flags, asking on the subreddit r/AskReddit for people to give examples from their own lives.
People shared ‘subtle red flags’ that give them ‘bad vibes’ — and their answers show how important it is to trust your instinct.
“What’s something subtle that instantly gives you bad vibes about someone?” asked a person who goes by the username yuko-mo-me on Reddit.
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The term “red flag” can be defined as “warning signs that indicate unhealthy or manipulative behavior.” While some red flags are clearer than others, such as overtly controlling behavior or a lack of trust, other red flags aren’t instantly recognizable.
The question posed on Reddit about subtle red flags received two thousand comments.
While people’s examples of subtle red flags varied, they all indicated the value in paying attention to your intuition.
A common theme in some answers revolved around the way people talk about themselves and others in casual conversations. One person said that their subtle red flag was someone “not being a reliable narrator and believing your assumptions as facts.”
Someone else echoed the sentiment related in that subtle red flag, explaining, “Small exaggerations or telling stories from your perspective once in a while [is] fine but seemingly being unable to frame your perspective and feelings separate from the rest of the world is concerning.”
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Another person said that they tend not to trust people who are “always the ‘good guy’ when they tell stories about bad situations.”
One specific example given as a subtle red flag was “People who incessantly refer to you by name in a conversation. It comes across like some weird sales [or] cult strategy to engineer fake rapport.”
Someone else said, “Obsessing about how other people eat their food. Particularly getting annoyed at plain eaters. Like, eat your own food and mind your own d–-n business. How someone else eats isn't going to affect your food.”
Another person shared a story that reinforced how expressing concern over other people’s eating habits can be problematic. They said, “I had a roommate who would mock me for eating ‘boring’ and ‘bland’ food every time I cooked… After moving out, I began cooking much more elaborate meals because I didn't feel stressed out... I later found out the reason I cook a lot of simple stuff in the first place is because I have autism.”
Someone else offered an example of how the way someone eats can signify who they are as a person. They relayed that “Whenever I've met someone and we go out to eat or just eat snacks at home, and they don't clean up after themselves… Those people are usually the last people to take responsibility for their actions.”
The little things that bother us about others don’t always signify something sinister is at play. Yet, more often than not, when our gut tells us something’s wrong, it means just that.
There's inherent value in listening to and trusting your intuition. If a person gives you bad vibes, it’s important to pay attention to that feeling, and stay curious about why you feel that way.
Alexandra Blogier is a writer on YourTango's news and entertainment team. She covers relationship issues, pop culture analysis and all things to do with the entertainment industry.