3 Powerful Ways To Deal With People Who Dominate Conversations
When someone dominates a conversation, it's a monologue and you didn't buy a ticket to hear it.
justaskjefferson / TikTok, New Africa / Shutterstock There is nothing worse than interacting with a conversational narcissist, a person who loves to make it all about them and has no interest in hearing about the happenings of your life.
Their way of socializing can be a result of their own smug nature, they could be attempting to manipulate you, or they simply couldn’t care less about what you have to say.
Trying to end that toxic conversation can be as hard as playing double-dutch, looking for the perfect place to exit smoothly. But once you are aware that the conversation has run its course and that there is nothing more to be gained, there are ways of leaving the interaction respectfully.
How to Deal With People Who Dominate Conversations
TikToker and lawyer Jefferson Fisher shared three ways he had come up with for handling people who take over the conversation.
He starts by saying, “When a person starts to dominate or monopolize the conversation, it’s no longer a conversation, but a monologue, and I didn’t buy a ticket to hear it.” He then goes on to lay out a few good tips for ending those awkward conversations.
1. Interrupt them.
The first way Fisher gives viewers for getting out of conversations with people who try to verbally dominate is to simply interrupt them.
According to Fisher, “This is one of the few exceptions where interrupting is a must, because if they’re not going to value your time, it’s your job to protect it.”
If you choose to deal with it in this manner, you just use their name to get their attention and don’t even have to wait for a break in the conversation. Start by saying the name low and progress to a higher volume until you get their attention, causing them to take pause.
2. Filter and pass.
Once you have successfully stopped them from talking, you are going to "filter and pass." This means you repeat what they said to you back to them. This tells them that they have been heard and understood.
From there, you ask for another person’s opinion, giving them a chance to talk, and subtly tell Mr. or Mrs. Motormouth to be quiet. Alternatively, you can offer your opinion to close the loop on the subject being discussed.
3. Put a time limit on it.
If you’ve done all that and they still insist on commanding the conversation, give them a time limit.
In the example given by Fisher, he says, “Hey, David. I got like two minutes and then I gotta bounce and knock some stuff out.”
No matter how much time you give, it’s important that you stick to your guns and leave when time is up since you’ve already set that expectation.
There are so many reasons a person might take over a conversation. Most are social and include things like "feeling important" or "branding" oneself by standing out.
Conversations should be a time of give and take where stories, ideas, and good vibes are transferred back and forth.
NyRee Ausler is a writer from Seattle, Washington who specializes in content self-love, interpersonal relationships, and lifestyle topics. She strives to deliver informative and entertaining news you can use to help navigate life.