Bride Demands Sister Cut Her 'Distracting' Hair If She Wants To Be A Bridesmaid
"If she’s gonna freak out about this, I worry what else she’s gonna freak out about."
Dmitry Lobanov via Shutterstock / Gabrielle Scarlett and athuristock from Getty Images via Canva Wedding planning can be stressful for all parties involved. Whether you're the bride, groom or in the wedding party, if you have a part to play, there’s a chance it can get rough.
One bridesmaid, whose sister was getting married, discovered quickly that her sister’s wedding planning process would become a stressful one once she started doling out rules for her bridesmaids.
The bride demanded her sister cut her hair before the wedding so it wouldn’t attract attention.
Posting to the subreddit “r/bridezillas,” a woman explained that her sister’s wedding was in a couple of months. Since her brother-in-law was a “cool enough person,” she was happy for her sister — until the sister's rules for her bridesmaids became clear.
“Some [were] understandable (like wearing longer sleeves to cover up my tattoos, I’m fine with that),” she wrote, “but one of them was really weird and felt kind of pointed at me, everyone in the wedding party must have shorter hair than the bride by at least 6 inches.”
The bride’s hair rests at her middle back and is already longer than the rest of the bridesmaids. The bride's sister, on the other hand, has knee-length hair, which she explained is “super important” and “a significant part of [her] identity." So unsurprisingly, she didn't want to cut it.
Photo: Todd Trapani / Unsplash
“My sister freaked out when I said I wasn’t gonna cut my hair, I offered to wear it up,” she wrote, but her sister reasoned that it would be a distraction if the rest of the women wore their hair down as she wanted. “I offered to just be at the wedding instead of in the wedding party and she began throwing a temper tantrum,” she continued.
Eventually, the woman's future brother-in-law reached out in an attempt to persuade her to cut her hair. She once again refused, but offered up a little more information into why she believed it was an unreasonable request — she would be spending years growing back hair just for one day of celebration.
Eventually, she decided to drop out as a bridesmaid and attend the wedding as a guest, a decision that came with one more request from the bride.
"I got a phone call from the bride herself, she was crying and said fine I don’t have to cut my hair or be a bridesmaid but to please wear it up," the woman wrote.
Traditionally, brides often have special requirements for their bridesmaids' appearances — most would agree there should be a limit to those demands.
When a bride asks someone to be a bridesmaid, it usually (or at least should) means that that person is special to them. It's certainly an honor to be included in what many brides consider the most meaningful day of their life. And while the bride should absolutely be the center of attention on her wedding day, expecting someone to alter their appearance isn't the best way to go about achieving that.
"Remember the point of a wedding party is asking people who have had the greatest impact in your life thus far to stand by your side on a really big day," an event-planning company told Insider. "If you find yourself choosing bridesmaids who will match your wedding, it might be time to hit pause and step back for a minute."
No hairstyle or wedding is worth destroying a relationship, especially that with a sister.
Isaac Serna-Diez is a writer who focuses on entertainment and news, social justice, and politics.