I Want An Old School Love, Not Whatever This Is

By Emma Spear

It seems like these days it’s impossible to find a relationship.

Sure, you can join dating apps and find people you connect with, but I feel like dating apps don’t always work, and sometimes relationships fall out quickly.

I look at relationships like the ones that my parents and other family members have and I just stare in awe. These relationships are so pure, and filled with love.

I feel like finding a true relationship is nearly impossible these days.

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With terms like “ghosting,” “talking” and “situationship,” you’re considered lucky if you get past “the talking stage.”

I want to love as you see in the movies, where the guy is walking me home, opening my car doors, and throwing pebbles at my window.

Instead, I’m sitting here staring at my phone wondering why I’m not getting a text back, or how many more swipes I can make on a dating app before I find “the one.”

For once, I want a guy to pick up the phone, and shoot me a text saying “hey, let’s grab dinner” instead of the usual “wyd?”

My parents met in college, and my dad got my mom’s number by asking the professor in their class for it because he “needed to borrow her textbook.” He called her from a payphone at the gas station he was working at and asked her out.

Their 30th wedding anniversary will be coming up shortly. That’s the love that we need to strive for.

We need people who give an effort and want to pursue a relationship. It seems like now we’re just lazy, and we’re fine with the bare minimum, and I don’t understand it.

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We are worth more than a single text back after we’ve waited for hours.

We’re worth having someone profess their love to us in a text, someone who will buy us flowers from 7-Eleven simply because they were thinking of us.

We deserve the love that we’ve always wished for, and I know I’m not the first girl to ask for something like this.

Hookups can be fun, and it can be nice not having the emotional attachment, but there comes a time when we have to say to ourselves "is this really what I want?"

And if that’s what you want, then fine, go for it, no one is stopping you, but it’s not what I want, and I refuse to settle for anything less than what I want.

I’ve always wanted to be married, I’ve always dreamed of having my wedding day standing there with the man of my dreams.

If this is someone I am going to spend the rest of my life with, I want our relationship to be meaningful and not just a fun fling for the night. That might be how some people find love, but I don’t know if that is what is exactly in the cards for me.

I am worthy of an amazing love story, and I know that it’ll happen for me one day, it’s just hard being in a modern world when you want old-school love.

I know I’m going to fall in love with the best person at the best time, hell, maybe I’ve met them already. But until then I think I’m good on my own because I know what I want, and if that means waiting then I’ll sure as hell wait.

You deserve the love you’re looking for, keep your head and you’ll get there. Hang in there, babe.

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Emma Spear is a student, paraeducator, writer, and contributor to Unwritten. She has a passion for writing about mental health, self-care, and education.