Mom Of 11 Kids With 8 Different Men Explains Why Having 8 Dads Is Better Than 1
It might not work for everyone, but it works for her.
krakenimages on Unsplash A mother with eight different fathers for her children decided to set the record straight on why she prefers it that way.
In a video, Phi, a Tennessee mother of almost a dozen children, hit back at all of the criticism and judgment she's gotten since sharing her familial situation, admitting that she has her "reasons" for what seems to be an unconventional reality for other people.
She has 11 children with 8 different men and believes having 8 fathers is better than having one.
In a video from August 2022, Phi addressed the backlash she had received and decided to explain that there were advantages to having different fathers for her children.
"One thing I'm sick of having to explain is why I have eight baby daddies," she said. "Let me explain it. If you have one and you take away one, you have zero but if you have eight and you take away three, you still have five.”
"If I only had one baby daddy and he [happened to] leave or die my kids would be fatherless,” she further pointed out in her comment section. “But if I have eight and three were to leave or die my kids still have five dads.”
In a follow-up video, Phi revealed how she keeps an amicable relationship with all eight of her children's fathers, saying that she simply keeps to herself to avoid drama and confrontations. "I don't take any of their [explative], I also don't need them for anything," she pointed out. "I manage everything on my own, what they do is a bonus for me."
Phi continued, adding that she is not afraid to "block" any of her children's fathers if they say something that she deems inappropriate and out of line.
She remarked that she and her children's fathers also have amicable relationships and that she has full trust in them to take care of the children they have together, and above all else, strives to be respected by them and vice versa. "I respect them, they respect me. It's co-parenting."
In another video, Phi joked against the backlash after receiving a comment asking if she would have more children, and where she finds men to be fathers to their children. "I wanna have like another 19, just so I could make it even, 30," she jokingly stated.
She later quipped that she'll locate fathers on sites such as Craigslist, saying, “But that’s kinda played out now so I usually just like post on Facebook Marketplace… or if I see like an empty billboard, I’ll post an ad up there.” Despite the humorous response, she seems to have a friendly and good-natured relationship with all of her children's fathers.
Many viewers were unimpressed by Phi's parenting situation and slammed the mom of eleven in her comments section.
"The only thing I learned here is that birth control should be administered at a certain point when clearly there is a problem like above,” one user declared.
“Once is a mistake. Twice is a choice. After that, it’s a habit,” another user stated. Meanwhile, a third bluntly wrote: “For the love of God, stop reproducing!!!”
However, other users praised Phi for being honest about her situation and having her children's best interests at heart. "Keep being a great mom," someone gushed.
Another added, "Take care of yourself throughout your life...you'll have 8 more! Do you boo!"
"You don’t even need to explain yourself if you are a good mom providing, that’s what matters to me," another chimed in.
Co-parenting can be complex and everyone's version of family is not always defiined by traditional standards
In a world quick to judge, Phi's story challenges conventional notions of family structure and parenting. Amidst the criticisms and praises, her unapologetic stance on her choices offers a valuable lesson: the importance of respecting diverse paths to parenthood and family. Instead of scrutinizing her situation through a narrow lens, we can learn to appreciate the resilience and resourcefulness it takes to navigate such complexities.
Phi's emphasis on maintaining amicable relationships with her children's fathers underscores the significance of effective co-parenting and prioritizing the well-being of the children involved.
Her story reminds us that family is not defined by traditional standards but rather by the love, care, and respect shared among its members. So, let us embrace the diversity of family dynamics and refrain from passing judgment, recognizing that each family's journey is unique and worthy of respect.
Nia Tipton is a writer living in Brooklyn. She covers pop culture, social justice issues, and trending topics. Keep up with her on Instagram and Twitter.