Woman Fears She 'Won't Enjoy' Her Honeymoon After Fiancé Asks To Bring His Daughter — Despite Already Bringing Her Baby
Evil stepmother in the making.
LightField Studios / Shutterstock Usually, honeymoons are a romantic getaway for newlyweds to spend one-on-one time together. Children are not normally considered to even tag along on what are meant to be these stress-free vacations.
One bride-to-be on Reddit is planning her honeymoon and intends on taking her infant with her and her fiancé on the trip.
However, when her fiancé informed her of his own plans to let his nine-year-old daughter tag along as well, the woman was against the idea.
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The woman fears that she will ‘not enjoy’ her honeymoon if her fiancé’s daughter comes with them.
Sharing her story in a now-deleted post on the subreddit thread, r/AmItheA–-hole (AITA), the bride-to-be asked other Redditors if her feelings were valid.
The 31-year-old revealed that she and her fiancé plan on getting married next year.
She is currently pregnant with their first child together and is due within the next couple of months.
Her fiancé also had a nine-year-old daughter from a previous relationship.
She admitted that the couple's baby would be joining them on their trip.
Since their baby will still be fairly young around the time of their wedding, the couple planned on bringing them along on their honeymoon rather than leaving them with family for a week.
Since their baby is tagging along on the trip, the woman’s fiancé believed it was fair that his daughter comes with them as well — except she disagrees.
She shares that she and her stepdaughter, who stays with her and her fiancé on the weekends, have a “good relationship.”
"She’s a nice little girl generally, a little bit cheeky but I make a big effort with her and do my best to make her feel welcome and at home when she’s with us,” she wrote.
"Honestly, though I have no major bond with her, I don’t feel any real love for her, no matter how much I try. That’s just how I feel.”
The woman adds that despite feeling no love for her stepdaughter, she would never be “mean” or “nasty” toward her.
However, this does not mean she wants her to come on their honeymoon, knowing that she “won’t enjoy the trip half as much if she’s there.”
"She’s not my daughter and I just don’t feel fully comfortable when she’s around. I wouldn’t be able to relax in the same way,” the woman wrote.
She and her fiancé have butted heads for weeks on the matter, as he believes that if one of their children is welcome on the honeymoon then the other should be there as well.
Redditors slammed the woman over her mistreatment of her stepdaughter.
"You are clearly drawing a line in the sand where it is you, your husband, and YOUR kid on one side and his child on the other,” one user pointed out. “That is not how you blend a family.”
“You are so into yourself that you don’t see that his child is equal to your unborn baby. Both are his kids,” another user noted.
“You’d be livid if nine years from now someone treated your child the way you’re treating his child.”
"This story breaks my heart. The writing is on the wall for this nine-year-old to feel excluded from her 'dad's family' for the rest of her life,” another user commented.
Other users pointed out that the woman will not enjoy her vacation regardless since she will be stuck taking care of a baby.
“I don’t know if you heard but babies cry a lot, constantly need to eat, and have diapers changed. You will not be relaxing on your honeymoon with a baby,” one user shared.
“You will soon discover that a ‘vacation’ with a small child is basically taking care of a small child in a different location,” another user pointed out.
Others encouraged the woman to change her attitude toward her stepdaughter now before it’s too late.
“You need to change your mindset if you want your marriage to last,” one user urged.
“Please please continue to try to create a bond with your stepdaughter. She is your soon-to-be stepdaughter,” another user wrote. “She is your husband's first child! She is a part of your family.”
If you marry into a relationship knowing that your partner has a child, you are signing up to bring them in as your family member as well — that means they should be treated as such.
Megan Quinn is a writer at YourTango who covers entertainment and news, self, love, and relationships.