Woman Excluded 16-Year-Old Niece From Her 'Child-Free' Wedding & Now She's Hurt She Isn't Invited To Her Birthday Party
She thinks her niece will "get over it."
IVASHstufio / Shutterstock After a teenager was not invited to her aunt’s wedding, she decided that she would no longer be inviting her to her own milestones.
When her aunt asked her mother why she was excluded, her mother asked her what she expected after being barred from a special day.
Now, the girl’s mother is wondering if she was too harsh.
The woman’s 16-year-old daughter was not invited to her aunt’s wedding since it was ‘child-free.’
Posting her story to the subreddit thread, r/AmITheA-hole, the 32-year-old woman sought the advice of other Redditors regarding her situation.
She began her post by revealing that her 16-year-old daughter and her 23-year-old sister have always been close due to their small age gap.
The woman’s sister got married a few months ago, however, her daughter was not invited since she did not meet the age requirement to attend.
“My daughter was extremely upset about this as my sister always talked about how important my daughter being at her wedding was going to be, and her wedding being childfree completely came out of the left field,” the mother wrote.
Recently, her daughter turned 16 and wanted to have a small party with a few family members and friends.
She decided not to invite her aunt to her birthday celebration since she was excluded from her wedding.
When the woman’s sister called and asked what time she should come to the birthday party, she reminded her that she was not invited after she disregarded her daughter’s feelings about not being invited to her wedding and she did not want her there since she was still upset.
“My sister got upset, asking why I was letting my daughter punish her because she had her wedding how she wanted it,” the mother wrote.
“I asked what she expected knowing how close she and my daughter are and told her she should have known that my daughter would be upset about it.”
Although she claims that her daughter had a “blast” at her birthday party, the woman’s sister is still being “passive-aggressive” toward her and her husband.
“I know it's my daughter's party, and it's supposed to be about her, but my sister's behavior is making me feel doubtful about my decision,” she revealed.
She added that her sister had known from the beginning that her niece would be upset if she did not invite her to her wedding.
Her sister told her that she “wanted the freedom to go wild at her wedding” and that her daughter would “get over it.”
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Redditors sided with the woman and her daughter.
“Your sister got to decide how she wanted her wedding; your daughter gets to decide how she wants her party,” one user commented. “Tit-for-tat. I hope your sister learns a lesson.”
“Your sister deliberately excluded your daughter from a milestone event. More than that, she built your daughter up for years and actively fed into her expectation that she would be included, even given a role of importance, in her wedding. Given the context, excluding her was just cruel,” another user pointed out.
“Your sister is welcome to apologize and try to make amends, but I would advocate for my daughter and refuse to intercede on my sister’s behalf.”
“People need to understand that the freedom to make choices exists for every person and that they need to face the consequences of those choices,” another user shared.
Other users pointed out that 16 years old was not exactly a child.
“Childfree I understand but considering a 16-year olf you were supposedly close with as a 'child' is an insult,” one user commented.
“16-year-olds aren't children, so honestly, excluding them from an event sounds more like a power trip than anything,” another wrote.
Hopefully, in the future, the woman’s sister will consider inviting her to more of her significant milestones so that she will be invited to hers.
Megan Quinn is a writer at YourTango who covers entertainment and news, self, love, and relationships.