Woman Promises To Pay For Adopted Sister's College Tuition But Refuses To Pay For Her Biological Brother
Her parents won't do it.
Look Studio / Shutterstock A woman is being praised after deciding to help her sister pay for college, but not her brother.
Posting to the subreddit "r/AmItheA--hole" (AITA) — a forum where users try to figure out if they were wrong or not in an argument that has been bothering them — she explained that her adopted sister, 17, isn't favored by their parents.
In her Reddit post, the 21-year-old woman wrote that she doesn't live at home, but her siblings do — where her sister, Amy, is always second-best to their 16-year-old brother.
"Growing up my parents always favored [my brother] and me over Amy," she recalled.
"I did not have a good relationship with [my brother] and he doesn't respect me but our parents always let him get away with everything."
She promised to pay for her adopted sister's college tuition but refuses to do the same for her biological brother.
At home, the woman explained that her sister has "the worst room" and is required to "do more chores" than the other siblings.
"My parents kept discouraging me from speaking and having a good relationship with Amy indirectly," she wrote.
When the woman decided to go to college, her parents told her they either wanted her to be a nurse or a doctor, but when she chose computer engineering, her parents refused to pay for her tuition and other college necessities.
"Luckily I got a partial scholarship and some loan funding and I ended up going to a top school," she revealed.
However, Amy has recently shown interest in coding.
During a recent family dinner, the siblings' parents told Amy that once she turned 18, they would be retiring, but promised Amy she wouldn't have to pay rent as long as she kept doing her chores.
"I saw red [and] told my parents that it was wrong to see Amy as a live-in slave and that she was smart and had a bright future ahead."
Her parents immediately said they wouldn't pay for Amy to go to college if she wanted to pursue coding, calling it a "useless degree."
"I said I would pay for Amy and she going live with me if she got into an [university] in the same city," she told her parents.
The woman also pointed out that she can afford to pay for Amy due to all of the money she recently made from one of the apps she created that has done really well.
After telling her parents she would pay for Amy to go to college, they argued about whether or not she'd also pay for her brother, though the woman refused, citing her negative relationship with him as the issue.
A majority of people who commented on her Reddit post agreed that she was NTA (Not The A--hole).
"Good for you for having Amy’s best interests at heart when it sounds like no one else does," one user wrote.
Another user added, "If your parents are so invested in equality, you wouldn't be in this situation at all, right?"
"It's never wrong to uphold good values and share [them] with loved ones. But neither is it your obligation to give equally to each sibling."
"It's a sisterly thing to do to look after Amy. That doesn't mean you're a jerk for ignoring your brother, whose needs are already met."
A third user chimed in, "Your parents should be ashamed of themselves. One would think they adopted her because they wanted better for her, but they clearly do not."
Nia Tipton is a writer living in Brooklyn. She covers pop culture, social justice issues, and trending topics. Keep up with her on Instagram and Twitter.