'I'm Jealous That My Sister's Husband Didn't Leave Her When She Got Sick Like Mine Did'
Her jealously is valid.
Evgency Hmur / Shutterstock A woman opened up about her resentment toward her sister after she was diagnosed with cancer.
Her sister's husband stayed with her after her cancer diagnosis while the woman’s husband abandoned her after her own diagnosis.
Her husband walked out soon after she was diagnosed with cancer.
The woman shared her story on the subreddit thread, r/TrueOffMyChest, an online space for people to share personal and intimate stories they do not wish to share with those close to them.
“My husband was out the door as soon as I got diagnosed,” she wrote.
According to her, her husband told her that he “didn’t sign up to be a nursemaid.” She and her husband had been married for 20 years.
Additionally, she shared that her prognosis was promising, as her cancer was only stage one and she did not require any treatment beyond the initial surgery to remove the tumor. She was hospitalized for one day.
As expected, the woman made a full recovery. “It's been almost 10 years and I'm cancer free still,” she wrote.
Still, she resents her ex-husband for leaving her and her children during a crucial time.
“I know I'm better off without him but our kids (ages 15 and 16 at the time) were devastated when he left,” she shared. “It was scary enough for them for me to have cancer but him just up and disappearing made it worse.”
The woman shared that her sister was also diagnosed with cancer after she was.
Her sister’s case was far more serious.
“She needs multiple surgeries and rounds of chemotherapy,” the woman wrote. “We almost lost her twice and she got covid during one of her chemotherapy rounds and that was serious.”
Unlike the woman’s husband, her sister’s husband remained by her side every step of the way.
“Her husband went to every appointment, slept on a cot in her hospital room after her surgeries if it was allowed, and treated her like a queen through everything,” the woman revealed.
“He took care of her almost 24/7 and only hired a nurse to help so he could also be there for their teenage children,” she added.
The woman claimed her brother-in-law was “the rock” of the family during those difficult times and “would have moved heaven and earth” to give her sister whatever she needed.
Thankfully, the woman’s sister is recovering well.
“She's now finished chemotherapy and the latest scans show no evidence of disease,” she shared.
Although the woman is grateful that her sister is holding up great and that she had a tremendous amount of support from her husband, she feels that she deserved the same.
“This may seem petty which is why I'm posting it here instead of saying it out loud but I'm jealous that her husband stayed,” she wrote.
“I'm not mad at her or anything because she is the best person I know and deserves the world but a small petty part of me gets jealous and feels like it is unfair.”
Many Redditors validated the woman’s feelings.
“It's understandable, your ex-husband treated you and your children appallingly. I'm so sorry you had to go through all of that,” one user wrote.
“It’s ok to be jealous and that you're putting it here where it can be thrown away,” another user pointed out. “Your husband sucks and you're right you are better off without him. I’m sorry you went through that.”
Other Redditors reminded the woman that she dodged a bullet.
"He did you a favor by taking off. It's clear you were the backbone for that relationship while he coasted by,” another user commented. “He couldn't possibly live a life where the sun did not rotate around him.”
According to an ISU study, there is a 6% higher probability of divorce for married couples where the wives fell ill compared to marriages with physically healthy wives.
However, there was no increase in divorce rates when a husband becomes sick.
Megan Quinn is a writer at YourTango who covers entertainment and news, self, love, and relationships.