The One Narcissistic Behavior That Drives A Victim To The Brink Of Insanity
It’s not the gaslighting or projection. It goes deeper than that.
GaudiLab / Shutterstock You can be the most loving, supportive, creative, funny, emotional, and adventurous person they've ever met, and you will never be enough for the soul-sucking life they chase.
You can be the best version of yourself. You can be there for them at the drop of a hat. You can do everything right and it still won't be enough for some people. And that's a life lesson to learn. Even if it hurts too much, you still have to walk away. Because you deserve better.
You two will share the biggest laughs, the best memories, hugs, and most incredible moments, but it’s all FAKE, just like them. And the jokes on you.
They share this fake crap with everyone! You were one of the unlucky ones to fall in their path, or better yet, maybe you pursued them once they played hard to get. They love the chase; they love it.
One day your trauma-bonded self will realize it!
You aren’t unique! I know they said you were.
They made you really believe all the crap they spewed out of their mouth daily, didn’t they? Looking back, you will realize they said many things but showed you nothing but misery.
But you kept believing their words. Of course, you did.
You wanted someone to say those things to you. But here's the best part, you are all those amazing things. And you were all those amazing things before someone came around and told you about them, and you still will be after they're gone.
Narcissists do it to everyone they are with! When will you realize that? There is nothing they said to you they aren’t saying to multiple people right now.
Now leave them alone while they groom the new person; they don’t have time for your needy self! Their focus is on making the latest person they're dating believe all the stuff you did initially. Remember that Oscar-worthy performance?
The good thing is, if you wait long enough, they will have an opening in their schedule. It could be hours from now or years from now, it's hard to tell with narcissists.
They eventually run everyone off and open up the old black book to see if you forgot what type of narcissist they were. Or better yet, maybe you have such little self-worth you have been slowly dying inside in their absence while waiting for them to come crawling back.
It sucks, I know. But the quicker you understand what you are dealing with when it comes to the worst kind of narcissists, the faster you can tell them goodbye.
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Chris Freyler is a Yourtango contributor who writes on mental health, psychology, relationships, and parenting. Read more of Chris Freyler's writing on Medium.