Woman Asks Grieving Mom For Her Baby Shower Gift Back After Her Son Was Stillborn
The lack of empathy is concerning.
Insung Yoon via Unsplash / KieferPix via Shutterstock In a Reddit post, someone shared screenshots of a mom's Facebook post regarding a conversation she had with a friend after the tragic death of her son.
The mom's friend asked her to return baby shower gifts just days after her son was stillborn.
The friend claimed she wanted to give it to another friend of hers who had a baby.
“Hey hun just wondering if you used the bits and bobs I got for the baby if not I can give them to Laura’s little one hope ur ok and resting up hun,” screenshots show the person asked in a message. She tried to justify her request, claiming that she wanted to save money for the holiday season. “Let me know hun before I by more stuff save a bit money for before xmas u know how it is.”
Photo: Reddit
Despite going through an extremely difficult time, the grieving mom tried to deal with this woman in a nice way.
“I can’t believe you’re asking me atm but yes I still have the things except for the blanket…he will be buried in it because it is warm and it is stunning,” she wrote.
Anyone should’ve understood by now that this probably isn’t the best time for the grieving mom. However, the woman didn’t think she was doing anything wrong and had the audacity to ask for the blanket.
“I just needed to know before I spend anymore, is there a chance you have another blanky for him babe?…Like you said its nice and warm and Laura’s baby can have use of that,” the friend responded. “Heartbreaking isn’t it hun let me know if u need ANYTHING I’m here all the time.”
Photo: Reddit
The mom didn’t want to reply to her friend after this. But after not hearing from the mom for a while, the woman messaged her again.
The woman suggested that she drop by to pick up the baby's gifts.
At this point, the mom just couldn’t take it.
“No!!!! Don’t come here please. The blanket is in with Benjamin!!!! You can have the rest…my husband is fuming with these messages you are sending me a week after I lose my baby," she wrote. "They’re packed in a bag… I'll leave them at yours. The blanket is with Benjamin he is having 'use’ out of it.”
To this, the friend showed her complete lack of empathy, getting angry with the mother and asking for a refund for the blanket.
“Excuse me!!!! I’ve been patient with you…I don’t see why you had to use the blanket that’s 7 you owe me it was 10 but I'll let the other 3 go seeing as u been unwell and had bad news.”
Photo: Reddit
After that, the woman tried to make amends but still refused to let go of the money.
“I'll see you tomorrow and we can catch up with a cuppa and make ammends [sic] i can’t leave our friendship like this. Babe no hard feelings I'll be in from 10am onwards… then u can come up with the bits and bobs and 10 pound.”
The mom didn’t bother to reply after this.
People weren’t shy to show contempt and anger for the insensitive friend through their comments.
“I'm appalled that not only did she do that, but she did it because she wanted to re-gift them to another person! To save a few pounds on Christmas gifts!” one person wrote, while another called her "a vile creature."
A woman commented how she could relate to it after having gone through the same thing, writing, “I am a mother of a stillborn and I can’t even begin to form a guess on what I would do if someone did this after I lost my baby. There are not enough words in my vocabulary that I have for this excuse of a human being.”
There's no excuse for treating a so-called friend this way after a traumatic experience.
Giving birth to a stillborn child is one of the most traumatic events a mom could experience, yet this woman found a way to make it worse.
Gifts should never come with strings, as "true altruism means unselfish devotion to others’ welfare," Sarah Newman, MA, MFA, wrote for PsychCentral. It should be unimaginable to ask a friend for a gift back in any situation, especially one like this.
Sanika Nalgirkar, M.F.A. is a writer and an Editorial Intern at YourTango who writes on entertainment & news, lifestyle, and pop culture topics.