Why It's So Important To Tell Your Crush How You Feel — Before It's Too Late
Should you tell your crush you like them? Yes. Here's why.
Crushes. No matter our age, we all have them.
You meet someone, find them attractive, and begin to develop feelings. The butterflies start and you light up whenever that person walks into a room. Sound familiar?
In a perfect world, your crush would miraculously discover how you feel without you having to actually say anything. Then, they begin to like you back, show up at your doorstep, and you ride off into the sunset together.
But this isn't a 1980's John Hughes movie, and we're not Molly Ringwald. In real life, sometimes being too shy to actually make a move means you don't get Jake Ryan in the end.
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Unless the object of your affection asks you out first, you're going to have to put in the work...a.k.a. ask them out.
I know, I know. The idea of this can feel scarier than a spider sighting in Australia, which is why my hope is that by sharing my own mistakes and learning from them, it might inspire you to be bold.
Let me start off by saying that I am a pretty outgoing person and I have definitely had my share of brave moments over the years. However, when it comes to someone I like, I become super shy. As an actor, I will gladly make a complete fool of myself in the name of the comedy, but tell a crush how I feel? Forget about it.
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Can you relate? You're totally comfortable around your friends, but the minute the guy or girl you like walks in the room it's as if you are literally trying to avoid eye contact with the person you want to talk to the most. Ironic isn't it?
This is what will happen, though, if you don't make your feelings known. Your crush will never have a clue you are into them and starts dating someone else who wasn't too scared to approach them.
This how I realized why you need to let your crush know you feel: I got sick of seeing people I've genuinely liked over the years end up with someone else because I was too scared to face rejection.
Listen, there is no guarantee that the person you like will feel the same way, but to never know is actually much worse. You end up living with regret.
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There's a great 90's romantic comedy film called My Best Friend's Wedding. It stars Julia Roberts and if you haven't seen it, I totally recommend it. For the sake of this article though, I will be including spoilers, so you have been warned.
In the film, Julia's character is best friends with a guy she had a brief fling with during college. They have been friends for nearly a decade, with neither of them coming close to a serious relationship with someone else, let alone marriage. Then he calls to say that he met someone and is getting married. Yikes! Julia's character realizes she's been in love with him this whole time, and instead of just telling him how she feels, she ends up trying to sabotage the wedding.
Side note: please do not sabotage any weddings.
Okay, now back to the movie... There is a scene in which it is literally the perfect moment for her to be honest about her feelings. The guy even remarks about how important it is to tell someone you love them. Hello!? And what happens? She chokes! She lets the moment pass her by and he ends up marrying the other girl.
All I'm saying is if you like someone, take a chance! Say hello and strike up a conversation. Ask them to hang out. You don't have to go all-in about your feelings up front, but at least show your interest. People generally don't take hints well.
Who knows? Maybe it will work out or maybe it won't. Either way, don't look back and wish you had. That is the real heartbreak.
Jill Zwarensteyn is a writer and Michigan native who covers trending topics, pop culture and astrology. When she’s not writing for YourTango, she is also a travel blogger and an actress.