This Major Mistake Keeps Waaay Too Many Men From Having Multiple Orgasms
Because yes, they can!
getty When it comes to understanding how to have the best sex and orgasms possible, many men and women are still unaware of the many ways tantric sex techniques like edging can benefit their sex life and their relationships at the same time.
But with the help of some simple tips (and some pleasurable masturbation as practice), both partners can experience a level sexuality they may never have thought possible.
Men have many economic and political advantages over women, but when it comes to sex, women tend to have so much more fun in bed!
The clitoris alone has 8,000 nerve-ending whereas the penis only has "only" 4,000 in comparison. And the multiple orgasms women are capable of having! That factor alone (almost) makes things like sexism pale in insignificance.
But ... men are actually capable of having multiple orgasms, too! Most of them just don't it and most don't know how.
Recently, after a two-hour session with my lover, during which he never ejaculated, he got himself into a massive mood with me over my ability to have had such a good time anyway. In fact, the next time we were together, he "got revenge" on me, as he put it, by ejaculating after only a few minutes.
I was taken aback by his behavior. He was clearly resentful of me for having so much more fun than he had, but I had done my best to make him happy, and yet, he'd managed to remain annoyed with me all week!
His behavior was quite rude, but then I tried putting myself in his shoes.
The obvious problem is that having an orgasm, or at least, ejaculating, is generally both the end goal and end of each sexual encounter for men. However, women don't just have one orgasm before losing interest and turning over to watch football on their phone.
But, many men are stuck in a cycle of sex for the sake of ejaculation. After all, anyone who has watched pornography knows that it's all about "the money shot."
Instead of exploring and finding what works for them, couples enter "the game" with a lot of assumptions. Most men don't know that they can orgasm without ejaculation — and this means that they can orgasm many times without having to stop (if they know how).
The good news is that thousands of years ago, people found a way around this sexual dilemma.
The first thing to understand is that orgasm and ejaculation are not the same things.
Orgasm is the energy around the ejaculation and it can happen without ejaculation.
If men learn how to separate the two, then they can have multiple orgasms without ejaculating. Not only does this benefit them, but it's also an amazing experience for women too. Both bodies vibrating together in a long orgasmic harmony can be the most incredible thing ever.
To most people, this seems like an impossible feat and it might not even make sense. But, it takes practice and dedication to make that happen and many men claim that the benefits more than pay off.
Here are 3 steps men can take to learn how to have good sex and have multiple orgasms:
1. Relax.
Allow the energy to spread through you rather than involuntarily force it out.
Stress is a fight-or-flight response and plays a major role in ejaculation. Many men have limited control over their ejaculation so instead of allowing stress to take over, try to relax.
2. Practice edging by yourself.
Set aside time for self-pleasure in order to practice edging. Work on continuously bringing yourself close to the edge of orgasm and then pulling back just before it happens.
Eventually, you will get to a point where you have a greater awareness that an orgasm is about to start with a partner and you will be able to stop it before ejaculation.
3. Locate, and learn to use, your PC muscles
Use your pubococcygeal (PC) muscles, the muscles located on your pelvic floor, as well as your mind, to pull the energy up and back into your when it is trying to make its way out.
This will send your orgasm shooting up your body, turning into a full body orgasm.
In ancient China, sex was viewed as an art form. There were realms of literature dedicated both to sex for fun and to sex for health benefits, some of which survives to this day.
The world is beset by an epidemic of sexual dysfunction, with both doctors and their patients are at a loss of what to do. In ancient China, the emperors also realized that after having sex with their multiple wives and concubines, they were exhausted. So, they set about on a mission to discover how to have sex without draining themselves.
This became a national pastime and most Chinese families at the time had a book entitled The Art of the Bedchamber in their homes. The secret, it claimed, was not to let the energy come out, but to pull it up the body.
The Ancient Chinese considered the ‘self-massage’ of sexual organs as part of a healthy meditation practice and an essential part of health and self-care.
These practices are part of Sexual Alchemy, an ancient Taoist practice that combines sex and masturbation with meditation. Alchemy is about transformation and when the energy travels up the body, it transforms and it energizes you. It's meditation where you play with your sexual energy with your mind, spreading it around your body instead of forcing it out.
It's a whole different perspective on masturbation than you might be used to, but it's a good way to improve your orgasms and it's so much fun, plus, it leaves you feeling energized instead of depleted after.
Self-pleasuring is an essential way to get to know your energy and discover your potential.
Through conscious self-pleasuring techniques like edging, you can learn to unleash your orgasmic potential and have multiple orgasms so you can have as much fun as many of us women do!
Jade Lotus is a Tantra Educator and Taoist instructor who specializes is sexological bodywork. She helps people to release traumas and heal themselves so they can find the life they are looking for. For more info check out her website. For more info about conscious self-pleasuring, subscribe to her YouTube channel.
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