The Type Of Toxic Person You Attract (And Why), Based On Your Personality Type
Do you find that you attract the same type of people over and over again? It may be thanks to your personality type.
Jacob Lund / Canva Relationships are very complicated. You always want to choose the right people to build relationships with, but unfortunately, things don't always go as planned. You may often catch yourself wondering why certain types of people are attracted to you, both the good and maybe the not-so-good.
It's fun to know why good relationships come into your life, but it's more important to understand why the wrong person does. Because the kind of people you attract has a lot to do with your personality type.
Being able to get a good grasp of your Myers-Briggs personality type can greatly impact how you see your relationships and could be why certain people may be drawn to you. So, there's a certain type of toxic person your personality type tends to attract.
The Type Of Toxic Person Your Myers-Briggs Type Attracts
1. ENFJ
As an ENFJ, you're extroverted and charismatic, but one of your biggest goals in life is to make sure people like you — and you have no problem going out of your way to achieve this likability, even if it means letting the wrong people into your life.
You tend to care too much about what other people think, so you usually attract people who know that they can influence or manipulate you.
The most important thing for you to remember is that you can't get everyone to like you, and the people do who like you as you are without trying to change you are the only people who matter anyway.
2. ENFP
You're incredibly enthusiastic and upbeat. Pleasing people is important to you and you're often willing to sacrifice your personal time to do so. This is why you attract users — or, in other words, people who will use you.
They know that you'll always agree to basically anything they want and they also know how easy it can be to get you to agree. You're willing to go the distance for these people, but they aren't willing to do the same for you.
You're wasting your precious personal time, money, and everything else by letting in people like this, so do yourself, an ENFP, a big favor and walk away from them.
3. ENTJ
You're strong-willed, cool under pressure, and are usually the most confident person in the room without even really trying to be. These are qualities that fascinate people and draw them to you, making you a brilliant leader and role model for many. However, this is also what attracts the wrong type of people to you.
The most common kind of toxic person ENTJ types attract is the narcissist. They want to be everything you are, so they'll squeeze their way into your life with seemingly good intentions until they reveal their true colors. Their ultimate goal was to take your place at the head of the table.
Although asserting your dominance over your own life is typically no sweat for you, you'll still need to keep one eye open around these people and remember to stand your ground a little firmer than usual when dealing with them.
4. ENTP
As an ENTP personality type, expect to have a lot of fans and followers who admire your uniqueness. But we're not just talking Instagram followers; there will be many copycats and fakes out there who want to be just like you.
They think they can mimic your appeal and authenticity. Don't worry, though. You have enough loyal, trustworthy people in your corner who will always be able to separate the knockoffs from the original.
5. ESTJ
People admire you no matter where you go or what you do. ESTJs are grounded, responsible individuals and everyone looks to them for advice and guidance. You absolutely love your position as the role model and you always help the people who look up to you, but not everyone who comes to you will give you that same respect.
You understand the importance of security and comfort zones, so you're always willing to lend an ear and give advice. You want your friends to feel safe and that there's someone they can count on. Unfortunately, there are people who will take advantage of this.
Some people get too clingy with you and try to dominate all your time. They know that you can't resist anyone who looks up to you and needs advice. But when they have fully inserted themselves into your lives and are seeking this advice at basically every waking hour of your life, a line has been crossed.
It can be hard for an ESTJ to say no, especially to someone who they think needs their guidance, but it's extremely important that you don't let your generosity get taken advantage of by toxic people.
6. ESTP
You like to dive into everything head-first. Because you're an ESTP, you're not one to live by the rules and prefer to enjoy the spontaneity that life brings.
Your ability to live life your own way is a huge part of your charm, but it also causes green eyes. Some people are jealous of your free-spirited, unapologetic approach to life. They try to bring you down and want to make you feel like an outcast instead of the special, easygoing individual you really are.
They'll judge everything you do and have no shame passing their thoughts about you around to others. But deep down, they really just envy you and wish they could be as unique as you are without caring what everyone thinks.
Lucky for you, you're much too content with who you are to let a little gossip by some judgmental people bring you down.
7. ESFP
As an ESFP, you love to be in the spotlight. You know who you are as soon as you walk into a room, and heads will definitely turn.
It isn't your fault, but with a dazzling reputation like yours, you're unfortunately bound to attract some people who like to stir the pot. These people like to start a commotion with drama and you're a prime target. They have nothing better to do than provoke drama and they thrive off of bringing you down.
You can't let these drama queens get to you, so try to remember that you have way more people who want the best for you than those who don't.
8. ESFJ
You always want to do the right thing and care deeply about the people around you. You can't stand to see someone in trouble, so naturally, those who have a victim complex tend to flock to you. They want to be "saved" by you and they know how much empathy you have for others.
Unfortunately, it can be difficult to spot a victim right away, but over time it will become clear as day. You'll start to notice that the victim seeks refuge and a way to end their suffering, but that they never actually take any action to do so. They'll use your big heart as a shield to protect them from this world, so they don't have to ever face their own problems.
It may be difficult, but as an ESFJ, don't let yourself get caught in this toxic cycle with a victim. There are some people who just aren't worth your heroic efforts.
9. ISTP
You're friendly, but you also greatly value your privacy. You appreciate having time to yourself and don't always let everyone into your life right away. Some people may take this personally and will lash out at you by being pushy and temperamental — and exactly the type of toxic personality you don't need in your life.
Temperamental people don't have the control that you, an ISTP personality, do over their emotions, especially the negative ones. They'll try to make you feel bad for them, so it can be a challenge not letting these people get in your head. Thankfully, you do a great job at keeping your cool.
10. ISTJ
You truly have the patience of a saint. As a natural introvert and ISTJ type, you're a reserved and quiet individual who likes to observe and take things in rather than talk. Some people just can't stand how calm and collected you are and how you always think before you speak.
Since you don't really like to vocally offer your opinions all the time, these people will seek out opportunities to put you down and show that they're better than you. These people have serious superiority complexes and are usually all talk and no game. Unlike you, they've obviously never heard that silence is indeed golden.
11. ISFJ
As an ISFJ, you're kind and warm-hearted. You have an amazing awareness of other people's feelings, so you're uncomfortable with any kind of conflict. You like to keep your life free of confrontation and try your best to guard yourself against it.
Toxic people will use this against you. They're mad that they can't get a rise out of you and will try their hardest to break down your defenses. They tend to think that since you're such a sweet person it will be easy to break you down, but they couldn't be more wrong.
You'll always stand up for yourself and you do it in the most respectable way possible, without ever raising a finger or your voice. In the end, you'll be the one standing tall while the toxic person is left feeling foolish.
12. ISFP
You're a service-oriented ISFP personality and enjoy helping people whenever you can. However, as an introvert, you also have a quiet side.
Arrogant types tend to seek you out because they know that you're nice enough to help them and won't speak up when they start making jokes that cross the line. These people are just downright offensive.
It's in your personality to want to help them even when they're being rude, but they're just not worth your time. The best action to take is to drop them and move on to someone who really needs the help.
13. INTP
You're an easy-going and highly independent INTP type. This is why you attract the mean girl clique type. They believe that people belong to a hierarchy of groups, not as different individuals with their own minds. And this is why they don't like you.
You think for yourself and you're never one to just go along with the crowd, especially if it's something that doesn't feel right to you. These mean people probably hold a personal grudge against you for being this way, but they're really just envious that they can't be an independent thinker like you.
You won't let people like this bring you down because you value your individualism far too much.
14. INFP
You're creative and expressive. Your dreams are big and you want to make them all come true, as a typical INFP type. But not everyone will support you; in fact, there are some people who just can't wait to crush those dreams.
They'll laugh at you and tell you how unrealistic you're being. They'll say that you'll never be able to do the things you aspire to. So, it's important for you to realize that these people are just upset with themselves because they never believed in or had the confidence to make their own dreams come true, so now they want to ruin it for you.
Your faith in yourself and your dreams is much stronger than they realize, and you're not about to let these dream-crushers stand in the way of achieving everything you've wanted.
15. INTJ
You've got a very strong work ethic, and anything you put your mind to, you can do. As an INTJ, you have a quick, ambitious mind and your ability to see logic is unmatched by any other personality type. People look to you when they need someone to make an important, informed decision.
This is why you attract people who want to challenge you — but not in a good way. They want to one-up you and will obsessively be keeping score. They'll always be quick to point out any little mistake you make.
They're waiting to find any kind of thing to fault you for, so they can use it against you whenever they feel like it. These people can be very tricky, because you don't always know when they're going to pull out something negative against you.
But what they don't know is that your sharp-witted mind always keeps you one step ahead.
16. INFJ
You're passionate and gentle. You also have a brilliant imagination that is constantly churning out original ideas. As an INFJ, your complex, different way of seeing things is what makes you really stand out from other personality types.
However, some people will be a little too into your ideas. They'll want to steal them and then take the credit. But these people are often so conceited that they'll speak before thinking and boast to everyone and anyone about their stolen ideas.
They make such a show of it that it raises alarm bells and becomes obvious that there's no way they thought of this. Only an INFJ is capable of thinking quite that creatively.
Sloane Solomon is a professional writer, editor, and former contributor to YourTango. She graduated from the University of Colorado with a Bachelors in English Writing, and has had her work published on Yahoo, MSN, and other outlets.